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Old 10-19-2011, 08:45 PM   #11
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Re: Maternity Graphic Tees

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They weren't thrilled b/c they think kids are expensive and b/c they had a family vacation planned for next summer and now we can't go. They were actually pretty disgusted when they saw DH's shirt.

To be honest, it's not the first time they've been cruel, but I think this hurt the worst. We were so thrilled and they totally took the wind out of our sails. We've prayed HARD for God to give us right attitudes and pure hearts, understanding that their concept of the worth of big families is not what ours is. My ILs only had 2 kids, where I come from a fam of 5, so I have to understand that they just don't get it. Trust me, it's taken 3 years for me to get to this place. I cried almost my whole pg with my DS because of their near mental cruelty.

BUT on the upside, my family is ecstatic and my parents have told us lots of times how they love our parenting and hope we have 10 kids. It helps a lot.
Hannah, I am so sad for you . It really makes me mad when people do that/say those things. To be honest, I wouldn't be able to be around people like that. There was a mom in my last DDC, they don't even tell her ILs until the baby is born (and she only has 2 kids) bc they are so evil to her and nasty about it. I don't understand that at all. I don't know what else to say except I am sorry they tainted even one minute of your happiness. Babies and children are such a blessing

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Old 10-19-2011, 09:22 PM   #12
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Old 10-20-2011, 12:18 AM   #13
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Re: Maternity Graphic Tees

We dont even talk to his parents. His mom is so rude and cruel and doesnt see it at all. She thinks its normal to talk so mean to everyone all the time. They never talk to us and they only live like 10 miles away down the country road. The only words were at our wedding were "why are your shoes blue" just such a cranky cranky lady who never has anything good to say. We have had to make the choice to part away as hard as it may be. I dont even think they knew about our last miscarriage, and word gets around in our small town. Or they just didnt care to contact us. Then theres my family who seem supportive but are so hard to read. Im not looking forward to coming out to family at all. I love sharing it with friends and members of church because we all share the same values but its rocky with family. I wish they would appear happy, and sincerely happy.
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Old 10-20-2011, 04:58 AM   #14
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Re: Maternity Graphic Tees

My mom wasn't so sure about us having #3 because she had 2, and that was perfect for her. I just told her that we don't feel like we have completed our family yet. I just said this is what is right for us, and we couldn't be more happy to be expecting baby #3.

I can't imagine having your parents or your spouse's parents be so upset about a new baby. Yes my mom wasn't so sure, but she couldn't have been happier when we told her, and my dad is OVER THE MOON excited. He even stopped smoking and said if he is going to have 3 grandchildren he has to be around for them. It made me so happy. My inlaws seem excited, they had 4 boys, and love the idea of more grandchildren to spoil.
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Old 10-20-2011, 10:00 AM   #15
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Re: Maternity Graphic Tees

Hannah -

I know exactly how you're feeling - except it's my own parents, not my inlaws, who are rude and mean about it. I haven't figured out how we'll tell them this time, but we will eventually in the next month or so. I'm debating just letting DD tell them - she wants to - but then I worry about them making hurtful comments to her about it.
With DS2 we didn't tell them, but told friends and DH's family. It ended up getting back to friends of mine who live near my parents, and one of their mothers congratulated my mom at work one day. Oops. They were really angry and couldn't believe we wouldn't tell them right away. We explained over and over that we didn't like their hurtful comments, that they had said rude things with past pregnancies that had hurt us and we didn't want to hear them, so we'd held off telling them. They full out denied making any rude or negative comments, and continued to act like the victims in the whole mess.

The comments we've heard so far - that, apparently, they have never made and if they did aren't/weren't hurtful/rude...
-having a hard time swallowing it
-this is it, right?
-and no more.
-and dh will have to get fixed after this one
-don't you know what causes this
-couldn't you afford condoms
-don't you know how to use condoms
and most hurtful of all, though not said to us, is that my mom wished we would have a m/c with our first pregnancy

I'm not sure how else we're supposed to take those comments. Ha ha, perhaps?
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Old 10-20-2011, 12:18 PM   #16
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Re: Maternity Graphic Tees

lol my dad was helping us move and we were taking down the crib, and he says "you guys are getting rid of this though right?" lol gosh they do have some nerve sometimes. The little subtle hints that are so passive. Its what matters in our hearts, and Gods heart, not what others think of you.
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Old 10-21-2011, 12:24 PM   #17
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I'm so sorry so many of us are having to experience garbage like this. It does help me to know I'm not the only one having to endure it. and ing for all of us.
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Old 10-21-2011, 12:52 PM   #18
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Re: Maternity Graphic Tees

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Originally Posted by Hskirball7 View Post
They weren't thrilled b/c they think kids are expensive and b/c they had a family vacation planned for next summer and now we can't go. They were actually pretty disgusted when they saw DH's shirt.

To be honest, it's not the first time they've been cruel, but I think this hurt the worst. We were so thrilled and they totally took the wind out of our sails. We've prayed HARD for God to give us right attitudes and pure hearts, understanding that their concept of the worth of big families is not what ours is. My ILs only had 2 kids, where I come from a fam of 5, so I have to understand that they just don't get it. Trust me, it's taken 3 years for me to get to this place. I cried almost my whole pg with my DS because of their near mental cruelty.

BUT on the upside, my family is ecstatic and my parents have told us lots of times how they love our parenting and hope we have 10 kids. It helps a lot.

So they got up on a soap box, and this is only baby #2??? What a disrespectful way for them to behave. YUCK!! If you are happy then let it slide. Your baby will be a blessing and that's all there is to it!

The vacation thing rang for me too, my mom has been harping about a family vacation to disneyland, we were planning one for spring 2012... but #3 will put a hold on that, again Personally, I think a newborn is a much bigger thrill!

Oh well, keep your chin up!!
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Old 10-21-2011, 12:58 PM   #19
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Re: Maternity Graphic Tees

[QUOTE=Hskirball7;13971490]The hard part is they are so passive aggressive. When I've brought up how they've hurt me they act innocent like "what are you talking about?"


Know what you mean.... My MIL, always says that it is my fault for being upset, because I am the one who can't take things in context. This from the woman who wouldn't even answer the phone for 2 days when DD2 was born because she was "too angry to see us" Kind of hard to take out of context IMH.
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Old 10-27-2011, 02:16 PM   #20
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Re: Maternity Graphic Tees

Just got my tees today. I will take pics of them and post them. I got Smalls. I as super nervous that they were going to be too small but they are a bit big and once I wash them. I think they will be perfect.
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