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Old 10-24-2011, 09:03 AM   #11
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Re: Freaking out.

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I don't know why, but tonight we were driving home and I was just thinking I could go into labour at any time, and I have to get this baby out of me... and I just started panicking about it all. I'm not ready, not ready to have another baby, not ready to have my LAST baby, and not ready for the homebirth, and not even really mentally prepared to go through labour again. I don't know why, I felt really prepared for it before, but all of a sudden as it looms closer now I am worried about it. Not worried because it's a homebirth, but just worried because it could happen at any time, and I guess I am a little nervous of the unknown. I almost feel nauseous thinking about it. HELP!!!
The Last baby part is really getting to me too! We have so much to be thankful for, and we both have that feeling like this is it, we are complete. But there is something about the thought that I will never do this again that is really freaking me out. The crazy thing is, I am not even one of those people that enjoys being pregnant. Dislike it quite a bit actually. Don't mind birth at all, maybe because I am a chronic kidney stone former and those hurt way worse so I always keep my mindset as "this could be so much worse," when I am in labor. And generally I am so miserable from pregnancy I am so ready for the whole thing to be over I am like bring on the pain because it can't be over till that happens. Yet somehow I am totally weirded out by this being "IT." I guess it's mostly related to the fact that I have been pregnant 4 times in the last 6 years and it's what I know. We are moving into the next chapter of life and that is scary

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Old 10-24-2011, 04:53 PM   #12
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Re: Freaking out.

Hugs, I'm sure you will do fine with labor and the homebirth. I'm still counting down to my 37 week mark but it is one of the ways I cope with the stress of the idea that baby could come anytime. Some how thinking I have more time to go helps.
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Old 10-24-2011, 07:50 PM   #13
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Re: Freaking out.

I also think it's the not knowing when that freaks me out the most. Having 3 kids already and the thought of when bothers me most.

So if it's when kids are in school, trying to organize that, if it's when they are all home in the evening, but Dh is not, explaining contractions - which actually I should just explain to them tomorrow so they are not scared just in case and can reassure toddler that mama is ok.

Then my cell is kinda broken as nobody can hear me and I can hear them!!! Have to get new phone on wednesday as all the important "on call" numbers are in my cell and my home phone only has local, so won't be able to call some of them if I need to call around for asap babysitters. Luckily I have a lot of neighbours around during the day who know the kdis well so just in case.....
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Old 10-25-2011, 01:20 PM   #14
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Re: Freaking out.

Also freaking out a bit. I'm 38 weeks. I don't have half of what needs to be done done yet. All my newborn diapers aren't here yet, the baby room decorations I'm making aren't done yet, haven't taken any belly pictures yet, etc. I have a midwife for a homebirth that I'm not in love with. Not mentally prepared at all! It's my first baby, so I have no idea what to expect, and I could pop at any moment and I'm scared of all these things I hear people talk about. 'Ring of fire', mucus plug, nursing issues oh my!
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Old 10-25-2011, 01:45 PM   #15
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Re: Freaking out.

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It's my first baby, so I have no idea what to expect, and I could pop at any moment and I'm scared of all these things I hear people talk about. 'Ring of fire', mucus plug, nursing issues oh my!
If it makes you feel better, I've never seen a big ol' hunk of mucous plug in any of my pregnancies, the "ring of fire" only lasted like 2 minutes, and nursing was not as difficult as I thought it would be..........don't get too worked up.
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