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Old 10-28-2011, 10:43 AM   #1
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So hard to be a homeschooling atheist

Ugh. I mean no offense to believers, I am just not one.

It is so hard to find non believer homeschooling families. Even in the secular groups, they seem to all be (somewhat uptight) Christians. Which means when I put on a Halloween party to bring some kids together and forge friendships, no one can come because they don't do Halloween. It was suggested I change the name to A Harvest Festival but that is ridiculous!!! First of all it is a HALLOWEEN party with costumes and scary decorations, second of all is that just not semantics? Like the truck or treating, how is that any different then trick or treating?

I am sorry if I offend really, it is just so hard to find friends for my kids and this puts an even thicker barrier.

Any atheist near Sacramento ca?


Lindsay, mom to intact boys Aidan 12 Roan 7 and Gabby Rose 5 :no longer breastfeeding, or cloth diapering, sometimes co sleeping, had 2 unassisted home births, but still non vaxing, unassisted home birthing and home schooling
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Old 10-28-2011, 12:32 PM   #2
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Re: So hard to be a homeschooling atheist

I am a conservative Christian. But, I wanted to tell you that I TOTALLY agree about Halloween v. Harvest party. I've always agreed with that even when I was a kid I didn't get it. If you did the Harvest thing in Sept or something, it would be different, but it is celebrated at Halloween because the kids want to celebrate. Dressing up and getting candy is fun!

When I was growing up, I went trick or treating. My husband's family did not. I told him when we were first married, that I could go either way (but would rather have our kids be allowed to T or T), but that if we decided we were not going to celebrate, that we were NOT going to celebrate, no harvest "alternative." Our kids go T or T'ing, but that is all we do and we are not into dressing as anything "scary."

I'm sorry they all turned you down and suggested you should change the semantics to make it acceptable. I'm sorry you are struggling to find a group of people who are similar to your beliefs.
Heather SAHM to 6 who are 7 and under, including 2 sets of twins and our last little miracle, a surviving identical twin, born Oct 2012!

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Old 10-28-2011, 02:45 PM   #3
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Well I'm on the other side of the country, but I'm a non believer who is homeschooling. At least you know there are some of us out here. Lol
Shauna, mom to Adrian, 9 and Charlie, 6!
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Old 10-28-2011, 03:17 PM   #4
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Re: So hard to be a homeschooling atheist

I am a Christian, but I do not judge those who have different beliefs. I hope you find some great families to hang with. I know it can be difficult to feel so different from others.
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Old 10-28-2011, 03:38 PM   #5
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Re: So hard to be a homeschooling atheist

I am a believer and would have a problem with scary Halloween parties. I would however send my kids to a harvest party. Not the same thing at all IMO. A harvest party, to me, is where you do fall related activities and is not geared towards scary. I would also be OK with a Halloween party that does not focus on the scary stuff. No skulls, skeletons, devils, etc.. A fun dress up party is great fun for people of all faiths. There are lots of things to dress up as that are not creepy. But, I am sorry you are having a hard time connecting to other homeschooling families.
Wife to the greatest hubby ever , Homeschooling Mommy to Dakota (11/01) , Paige (12/03) , Luke (4/06) , and Sarah (11/07) , Gabriel (12/10) , and a new little one in March !
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Old 10-28-2011, 03:39 PM   #6
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Re: So hard to be a homeschooling atheist

There is a pretty large secular homeschooling group here. i actually dont know that many religious homeschoolers which is funny since we live in the "bible belt"
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Old 10-28-2011, 03:44 PM   #7
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I understand about trying to find atheists whom home school. I have had the same issue (I'm in Texas!). This year, we are doing Connections Academy (online school) but still home-based. Would be nice to find like-minded people, so I feel your pain! And yeah, "Harvest" or "Halloween"...just semantics, IMO.
Happily married, Mom of C (15), M (3), and E (1). Expecting a very big surprise baby on 3/25/14.
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Old 10-28-2011, 07:08 PM   #8
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I found a secular homeschooling forum. Don't have the link but may be a good resource. :-)

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Sara wifey to Chad and momma to Lily (4/11)

Sunny due in October!

We're a breastfeedin', babywearin', vax delayin', un-circumcisin', cloth diaperin', bedsharin', home birthin', atheist family from Texas!
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Old 10-29-2011, 12:16 AM   #9
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Re: So hard to be a homeschooling atheist

lol i didn't know the truck or treat was an alternative to trick or treating still getting candy
Maya mom to 4 and one more otw
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Old 10-29-2011, 12:21 AM   #10
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Re: So hard to be a homeschooling atheist

I know what you are saying. I was actually having a similar conversation with my tattoo artist. He was just looking for fellow atheist parents to hang out with (he can't homeschool because he co-parents with his ex). It is hard for us to find people with common interests and beliefs/non beliefs. Now as for a harvest vs Halloween party, well Halloween is based on the celebration of the pagan holiday Samhain which was a harvest festival as well as a holiday to celebrate the new year. It was also a time when the Celts believed the that veil between the worlds was the thinnest and they also celebrated their dead at this time of the year. So history lesson aside Halloween is also technically a Harvest celebration. That is why I always get a bit of a laugh at churches having "Halloween alternative" Harvest festivals. The name Halloween was the given by the Catholic church in an attempt to Christianize the holiday (which is why it amuses me so much). But that is just me being me. We spend most of October learning the actual history of Halloween (can you tell I spent years as a Celtic Pagan before becoming atheist?).

I would take my kids to either a secular Halloween party or a Harvest party. Both sound like a lot of fun. I wish we knew people who threw them. A couple of years ago I did have a Halloween party at my place but it wasn't for kids. I think something with costumes and stuff is a lot of fun and we always do Trick or Treating. When I was a kid I had a friend whose birthday was near Halloween and she often had a holiday themed party. It was great. I would also enjoy a harvest themed party but would assume it would be totally different and possibly more pagan themed (not that it would bother me any). I would assume there would be costumes or anything at a harvest party.
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