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Old 12-14-2011, 11:37 AM   #1
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My appointment in a broken system - long

So my appointment today was a bust. The nurse that scheduled me told me I did not have to get another pelvic, pap, and breast exam because I had one in October. First thing the nurse tells me to do when I get in there is take all my clothes off and put on a gown. I tell her I was told I didn't need to do an exam because I had one in October and she gave me that "you're nuts" look and said "ok..... well I guess I can talk to the Dr. about that, but you still need to do it for the ultrasound". I asked if my ultrasound was going to be transvaginal and she said yes because the baby is too small to see through the abdomen. I said, really? At 10 weeks? Because I have had them earlier than that and NEVER had a transvaginal. She said yes and she'll go get the Dr. and leaves. 15 MINUTES LATER the Dr. comes in and I tell her I am not prepared to do a pelvic, or pap, or breast exam, and certainly not a transvaginal ultrasound. She says that the pelvic is necessary to make sure my uterus is the right size, I have no masses on my ovaries, and I'm not dilated or in preterm labor. She said the transvaginal ultrasound is to date the pregnancy. I asked her what exactly they were going to do about it if I was and she said they could do cerclage and put me on medication for the duration of the pregnancy if there are problems. I said well if there are problems they will present themselves and we don't need to go looking for them. She said that sometimes they show themselves too late. I just didn't say anything else to that. Then I asked if there is anything else we can do today besides the pelvic exam and she said no and to reschedule in 2-3 weeks and left the room. I went to the front desk and told the receptionist (who is SUPER awesome) that I needed to reschedule and told her why. She said she has a midwife but there is no availability until Jan 12. I said that's fine - I've been through pg before, things are either fine or they're not. So my next (first) appt is on Jan 12. I am not going to submit to their searches for problems that don't exist. God will take care of us. I have no history of preterm labor or incompetent cervix - or ANY pregnancy problems at all. I am not going to allow someone to sew my cervix shut. I am not going to be on preterm labor meds for 30 weeks if I am in preterm labor (at 10 weeks.......wth??). I am not going to spend 6 months in a hospital on bed rest. If this baby is supposed to join us it will - and with minimal intervention. If I am supposed to meet my babe in heaven I will. It will have two brothers up there to look after it.

No, I do not have a choice of providers because it is the seriously effed up military medical system. I am so, so thankful my husband was with me to witness the OB process. We have been doing research about home birth with a midwife and he was really on the fence but now I'm pretty sure I have a solid supporter. He was appalled by not only what they were wanting to do, but their response to my wishes. I am going to give this midwife a chance on Jan 12, but we are totally prepared to downgrade our insurance to get coverage for our own midwife that we choose and to birth where we want.

I am bummed I did not get to hear or see a little heartbeat - but I am so proud of myself for sticking up for what I wanted and am feeling very empowered right now. THIS pregnancy will be different. I will no longer be subject to "them". Ok - rant over.

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Old 12-14-2011, 12:08 PM   #2
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Originally Posted by SqueakersMama
So my appointment today was a bust. The nurse that scheduled me told me I did not have to get another pelvic, pap, and breast exam because I had one in October. First thing the nurse tells me to do when I get in there is take all my clothes off and put on a gown. I tell her I was told I didn't need to do an exam because I had one in October and she gave me that "you're nuts" look and said "ok..... well I guess I can talk to the Dr. about that, but you still need to do it for the ultrasound". I asked if my ultrasound was going to be transvaginal and she said yes because the baby is too small to see through the abdomen. I said, really? At 10 weeks? Because I have had them earlier than that and NEVER had a transvaginal. She said yes and she'll go get the Dr. and leaves. 15 MINUTES LATER the Dr. comes in and I tell her I am not prepared to do a pelvic, or pap, or breast exam, and certainly not a transvaginal ultrasound. She says that the pelvic is necessary to make sure my uterus is the right size, I have no masses on my ovaries, and I'm not dilated or in preterm labor. She said the transvaginal ultrasound is to date the pregnancy. I asked her what exactly they were going to do about it if I was and she said they could do cerclage and put me on medication for the duration of the pregnancy if there are problems. I said well if there are problems they will present themselves and we don't need to go looking for them. She said that sometimes they show themselves too late. I just didn't say anything else to that. Then I asked if there is anything else we can do today besides the pelvic exam and she said no and to reschedule in 2-3 weeks and left the room. I went to the front desk and told the receptionist (who is SUPER awesome) that I needed to reschedule and told her why. She said she has a midwife but there is no availability until Jan 12. I said that's fine - I've been through pg before, things are either fine or they're not. So my next (first) appt is on Jan 12. I am not going to submit to their searches for problems that don't exist. God will take care of us. I have no history of preterm labor or incompetent cervix - or ANY pregnancy problems at all. I am not going to allow someone to sew my cervix shut. I am not going to be on preterm labor meds for 30 weeks if I am in preterm labor (at 10 weeks.......wth??). I am not going to spend 6 months in a hospital on bed rest. If this baby is supposed to join us it will - and with minimal intervention. If I am supposed to meet my babe in heaven I will. It will have two brothers up there to look after it.

No, I do not have a choice of providers because it is the seriously effed up military medical system. I am so, so thankful my husband was with me to witness the OB process. We have been doing research about home birth with a midwife and he was really on the fence but now I'm pretty sure I have a solid supporter. He was appalled by not only what they were wanting to do, but their response to my wishes. I am going to give this midwife a chance on Jan 12, but we are totally prepared to downgrade our insurance to get coverage for our own midwife that we choose and to birth where we want.

I am bummed I did not get to hear or see a little heartbeat - but I am so proud of myself for sticking up for what I wanted and am feeling very empowered right now. THIS pregnancy will be different. I will no longer be subject to "them". Ok - rant over.
you go mama! I'm with you all the way.
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Old 12-14-2011, 12:15 PM   #3
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Re: My appointment in a broken system - long

I totally get not wanting to have the cerclage or medicine for preterm labor for the rest of hte pregnancy...and relying and trusting in God for the outcome.Whats going to happen, will happen. But... why were you not interested in the exam to see?
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Old 12-14-2011, 12:17 PM   #4
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Geez why would they check for preterm labor st 10 weeks? That's so weird....way to stand up mama!
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Old 12-14-2011, 12:32 PM   #5
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Re: My appointment in a broken system - long

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Originally Posted by mabelino View Post
I totally get not wanting to have the cerclage or medicine for preterm labor for the rest of hte pregnancy...and relying and trusting in God for the outcome.Whats going to happen, will happen. But... why were you not interested in the exam to see?
Beth - no hiding needed! I just did not feel like there is a good enough reason to have someone's hands and several different instruments poking and prodding all up inside me. Its hard to describe - but I woke up this morning with a real inner peace about the outcome of this pregnancy - whether it be good or bad. Having that feeling really made seeing and hearing the baby fall very close to the bottom of my list of priorities. I guess the need to protect my body and privacy outweighed my desire to see the baby that I know is there and ok. I'm sure I probably sound like a real whack job to some people - but its just hard to describe. If they can't figure out a better way to assess the health of me and my baby than sticking objects in my orifices then I will pass!
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Old 12-14-2011, 12:37 PM   #6
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Re: My appointment in a broken system - long

ddc, glad you stood up for yourself, that dr and nurse sound like quacks.
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Old 12-14-2011, 12:37 PM   #7
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Re: My appointment in a broken system - long

Wow, that's something else! I'm glad you stuck up for what you believe is best!
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Old 12-14-2011, 12:53 PM   #8
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Re: My appointment in a broken system - long

wow, mainstream medicine is so messed up.

I hope you will be able to get a midwife. I'm sure thankful to not have to deal with a doctor this time around. I'm glad you stuck up for you and your baby.
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Old 12-14-2011, 12:56 PM   #9
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Re: My appointment in a broken system - long

CRAZY. (The office, not you!) My OB did a pap smear (I was over a year overdue for one, hadn't had one since pg with DS) but no other searching around, not even a breast exam. She did an internal ultrasound (I was 6 weeks) at my request. The OB was checking for pre-term labor? WHAT?
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Old 12-14-2011, 12:59 PM   #10
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I dunno if I missed something. We're you having bleeding or something ? Why was a cerclage mentioned ?

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