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Old 06-10-2006, 10:17 AM   #1
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Why does she have to scream all the time?

I need a blinkie that says "Mom to a 5 yr old drama queen"

Skyler is always screaming. If she's not screaming just to scream to try to be funny, she screams when she talks to me and her brothers. Right now the baby and the dog are in her room, and she's upstairs screaming at the dog "get out of my room Xena! Come OOOOOOOOOON!!!"

What happened to using an 'indoor voice?' I've told her that she will have time outs if she can't speak nicely, but then she will yell at us telling us that she doesn't like us, etc..

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Old 06-10-2006, 11:32 AM   #2
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Re: Why does she have to scream all the time?

I've only dealt w/5 yo boys and they didn't scream thank god LOL My dd does enough of that on her own.
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Old 06-10-2006, 02:20 PM   #3
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Re: Why does she have to scream all the time?

yeah, my son is almost 7 and he's never done that. My 2 yr old boy does though. lol But he's 2. kwim?
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Old 06-11-2006, 05:09 AM   #4
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Re: Why does she have to scream all the time?

Don't let her run the show! If you're scared of giving her a timeout for breaking a house rule because then she'll tell you you're mean, you're going to have many more problems before she's done growing up. There are many wonderful books out there on discipline; take a look around and see what you think might work for you.

Another helpful suggestion would be to get advice from any teachers you respect, and, if possible, watch them in action. Teachers have to learn how to handle whole classrooms with situations like this, and can be very helpful. I know my parenting improved a whole lot once I survived my first year or two in a classroom.
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Old 06-11-2006, 05:58 AM   #5
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Re: Why does she have to scream all the time?

It's a girl thing!! My dd is nearly 4 and she has no indoor voice I swear, always screaming. She woke up my daycare baby the other day and I was very upset by that one and I had repeatedly told her to quiet down. She screams at the dog, for people to get out of the way, at the neighbor kids (from inside the house), it's really nerve racking. I have started telling her that if she is creaming outside she must come in and go to her room (it sounds like she is being abused if she gets dirt on her) and that works a tiny bit. If she screams int he house I will ask her nicely to calm it down and after a few warnings I tell her she has to go to her room and is not allowed out until she can control the volume of her voice. Again this works a bit, she is just a very loud child. I feel for you and totally understand. If it makes you feel better the neighbor girl also did that and now at 8 has finally stopped.
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Old 06-11-2006, 08:56 AM   #6
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Re: Why does she have to scream all the time?

I have a 3 year old that we are nipping this in the butt with. We put her in timeout every single time she rasies her voice no matter where we are, I will not tolerate this in my house she get one warning and after that it is straight to timeout. I don't mind so much if she is out side and yells, but the high pitched screaming has to go. our house is way to small to allow that to happen. you need to just bite the bullet and put her butt in timeout everytime and if she yells at you wile in timeout keep adding to the time she sits there. She will eventulally get the point. I have to stop before my DH does because he will just smack her in the mouth for it. So I am being ver diligent to get this undercontrol
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Old 06-11-2006, 10:26 AM   #7
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Re: Why does she have to scream all the time?

the thing is, I do give her time outs and when she's headed for time out is when she's screaming louder telling us that she doesnt like us, etc.. she told my dh she doesnt like him, she's told me the same thing. She's called my son a stupid baby. Theres other things that she does that freak me out too. She's tried to push my son (2) down the stairs from the very top right in front of dh in her fit of rage, she almost pushed him into a lit charcoal grill on my sil's deck, she told him to go in the street because he wanted the bike that she was on and she was pissed. I honestly do not think that she is thinking that all these things will hurt him. I think she is needing attention, hence the raising of her voice. She just turned 5 and isnt in school yet- she starts kindy in Aug. I've asked my son's kindy teacher who will have her in the fall what I should do, and she agrees its an attention thing. She used to be the baby, and now Andrew is my baby and she's pissed. Don't get me wrong, its not an all day thing where she's naughty, but when she's naughty it almost always involves my younger son. When I send her to her room, I hear her sobbing and sobbing and it just breaks my heart. She wants my attention and I am shoving her in her room. kwim? DS's teacher assured me it will be better once she's in school. I am praying!!
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Old 06-11-2006, 11:48 AM   #8
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Re: Why does she have to scream all the time?

I have 3 girls. My 7yo screams when she's mad at us. It is alot of "I don't like you", "you never let me do what I want to" "I never get to do anything" "it is all your fault I can't do xxxx" " i don't want to live here anymore". When in reality she gets to do alot of these things but at that exact moment in time she can't. She gets put her in room(though now she just goes herself). When she stops screaming I go in and talk to her, we discuss the things she does get to do, whether she really hates us(and she never really does), where she's going to go if she can't live here, how she's going to get food and such. We talk about the reason why she wasn't allowed to do what it is she wanted to. I don't try to stop her from screaming when she's mad because she's expressing her feelings instead of bottling them up. It never lasts long(2-3 minutes) and as she gets older she's finding other methods of dealing with her emotions.

Now if they are screaming when playing, at each other and are indoors we take the "I can't hear you/understand you" attitude. Even if we know exactly what they're saying we act like we can't until they talk in a normal voice. It has cut down most of the screetching.

What also helps is keeping your and dh's voice in normal pitches so they aren't picking up that it is okay to do that.

They can scream all they want to outside.
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Old 06-11-2006, 11:53 AM   #9
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Re: Why does she have to scream all the time?

I feel for you! It's so hard when you see them crying like that, and you know they're being naughty because they need attention. Try to catch her being good, and try to pay attention to her when you can. You can put her in timeout in any quiet place; it doesn't have to be a room. And I add on extra time to the timeout if my kids break the rules; timeouts have to be taken sitting still and in silence. If they disobey, they get more time added for each infraction. Good luck, and hang tough.
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Old 06-11-2006, 12:19 PM   #10
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Re: Why does she have to scream all the time?

Have you tried "girl time". Leave you son with someone(dh,etc) and go out with her to a movie, ice cream, shopping, crafting at a friends house(or in her room w/ her) etc. and spend time with just her.

Maybe when she is calm you can ask her why she is acting out and how she feels about your son.

My dd is still only 8.5 months so i've got a while till i am in your shoes.
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