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Old 01-03-2012, 11:44 AM   #21
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Re: Single and pregnant with #4

we have a similar story. Im preg with #5. My divorce is not final yet and Im already 11 weeks preg with my current boyfriends baby. Hes also diverse and has children. Its also extremely embarrassing for me as well to not be married and preg. BUT trust me as Ive noticed this is VERY common as sad as it sounds and still does not make it ok. But it is what it is My X got a snipped back in 2009 knowing I still wanted children. I think that was the first sign of me knowing my marriage would fail. I hope you the best and you can always private message me to vent. After all I understand /


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Old 01-03-2012, 02:02 PM   #22
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Re: Single and pregnant with #4

I wish you a healthy pregnancy, and an enjoyable one!

People always have stuff to say, in the end, they don't matter, though I know it's hard to ignore, but just remember, the love of your family is the most important!!
Mama of 3 little munchkins!

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Old 01-03-2012, 02:11 PM   #23
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Re: Single and pregnant with #4

Me too!

I too, thought what would be everyone's reaction, but they were mostly surprised. I have struggled too long to have bio children so I'm not going to let anyone spoil this for me. I am so sorry about your losses. My mom passed away years ago, but I still know the hurt and I've had 3 losses myself.

I have been a single mother by choice (through adoption) for so long that I don't know any other way to parent. I was married briefly to my bio children's father (including the one I'm now carrying), but it is so much easier and more enjoyable without him stressing me out on a daily basis.

Congratulations and good luck! Hold your head high and be proud, there is nothing to be embarrassed about for bringing a new life into the world. You never know what greatness this baby will bring to the world.
M, N, I ( born too soon), S and newbie N 4/12 .
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Old 01-03-2012, 02:43 PM   #24
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Hi! I remember you too way back from AB, wow, that does seem like forever ago. Sorry to hear about your divorce, mom's death and the m/c....year 2012 can only be better!
Maria, wife to David and stay-at-home-mama to four children.
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Old 01-03-2012, 05:35 PM   #25
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Re: Single and pregnant with #4

Baby are miracles!
Congrats on your pregnancy!!!!
Ariana Armando
{M.o3'} {E.o5'} {C.o9'} {S.12'} {D.14'} {J.15'}
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Old 01-05-2012, 10:52 PM   #26
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Re: Single and pregnant with #4

I remember you!

Congrats on your pregnancy. I hope everything goes smoothly for you
SAHM to DD ('07) DS ('09) and DD2 ('12)
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Old 01-06-2012, 12:54 AM   #27
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Re: Single and pregnant with #4

Congrats on your pregnancy. As for feeling weird about being unmarried ... it's natural but it's also becoming more normal. If you carry yourself confidently, and you are open and honest, people will probably understand.

My DS's son is my best friend, whom I was working for at the time. Nobody knew we "dated" because it was VERY brief. By the time we knew I was pregnant, he was in fact engaged to a woman he'd met overseas (a decision he made very quickly).

So I had to announce to my family that I was pregnant, and Dad and I would just be friends. Nothing more, not ever.

My Dad replied that he wished he could be happy, but (even though he'd love the baby when it came), he couldn't be happy about the situation. That stung a little but I'm glad he was honest, and truth be told I felt the same way. I was pretty embarrassed.

It got even weirder as LO's Dad had to tell his fiancee, and then she was still waiting for her Visa when LO was born and when LO's Dad got relocated across the country and we went with him (and lived with him). Nothing like showing up in a new neighborhood in the highly conservative Midwest, saying "Yep we all live under one roof ... nope he's not my husband, in fact he's engaged to a woman who will be here soon ... "

She got here in April, and they got married shortly thereafter, the day before LO turned 1. The wedding photos are interesting.

And now we still have to explain a lot ... we still live all together, most of the time. It's tough on stepmom, that I get mistaken for the wife once people read that the baby is mine and his. She's sometimes embarrassed to explain the situation. My family thinks it's odd (my Southern Baptist grandmother is appalled and kept waiting for me to marry him).

But for the most part, when we explain and don't apologize or seem embarrassed, people just go "Oh, that's great."

Our son is a remarkably well adjusted little one, with so many people who love him. It's been tough on the adults but it's gotten to feel normal pretty quickly.

Oh and I worked with Dad all through the pregnancy. He was the construction manager on this job, and I was the admin ... there were whisperings about "is it HIS baby?" but we didn't answer anyone unless they asked us directly. It kind of became a game, we'd only reward the brave people, not the gossips. And then once the baby arrived, Daddy showed up at work with LO, as a proud papa. We just gave whatever info was relevant at the time. Didn't worry about big announcements.

Don't know if that helps ... at least maybe you feel less weird.
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