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Old 01-10-2012, 03:08 PM   #21
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Re: Can't have a homebirth- what would you do?

Jul - first of all - get thine arse back in the Junebugs board.

That being said I'm not totally sure what I'd do in your situation.
Is there any way you could see the OBs near, but "transfer" to the other OB at, say, 35-37wks? I'd just decline/refuse the tests and use of doppler. Get the GBS swab done and leave it at that. Hopefully you'll come up negative this time ( for both of us there) and there won't be able problems leaving the hospital right away.
I kwym about not wanting to be far from K. But H could stay with him - though this leaves you without H (I'd rather me alone than the kids, though) - just be there for the birth and a bit (could the older boys stay with K?) and bring K to bring home you and baby.

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Old 01-10-2012, 03:28 PM   #22
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Re: Can't have a homebirth- what would you do?

Honestly, I would just start planning for the best hospital birth possible. I was very close to having to give up my homebirth due to BP issues with my last pregnancy. Sometimes there just aren't any more options and you have to make the best of what you have.
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Old 01-10-2012, 03:32 PM   #23
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Re: Can't have a homebirth- what would you do?

Good luck, mama! This sounds tough. I'd probably go to the doc close by I didn't like and see how things develop. If it looked like things were going to be hard and hostile, I'd switch to the doc I liked at the very end (34-36 wks) and deliver at the 'good' hospital- does that make sense???
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Old 01-10-2012, 03:39 PM   #24
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Re: Can't have a homebirth- what would you do?

I plan on laboring at home as long as possible. We can't afford a homebirth and we only have one hospital in the area that isn't all that great. So yeah, labor at home as long as possible.

Otherwise, I hope things work out and that you can get into a good hospital. I'd plan for a really good hospital birth. There's a good book called "Homebirth in the Hospital." Check that out, it was helpful!
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Old 01-10-2012, 03:48 PM   #25
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Re: Can't have a homebirth- what would you do?

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Originally Posted by canadianbakers View Post
Jul - first of all - get thine arse back in the Junebugs board.

That being said I'm not totally sure what I'd do in your situation.
Is there any way you could see the OBs near, but "transfer" to the other OB at, say, 35-37wks? I'd just decline/refuse the tests and use of doppler. Get the GBS swab done and leave it at that. Hopefully you'll come up negative this time ( for both of us there) and there won't be able problems leaving the hospital right away.
I kwym about not wanting to be far from K. But H could stay with him - though this leaves you without H (I'd rather me alone than the kids, though) - just be there for the birth and a bit (could the older boys stay with K?) and bring K to bring home you and baby.
LOL Elena
Well, I would never leave Kailani at home. The hospital is an hr away, so who would be there for him? Hana can't go back and forth and besides, I wouldn't be there long enough....Kailani was born at almost noon and we left around 11 that night. We were gonna leave earlier, but people were coming from out of town on the way to see us, so we just met them there. So I anticipate leaving a few hours after the birth. The boys are in school/college and the other one is too young to be in charge of him while I am that far away. Plus with joint custody, I never know where they will be.

I dunno about refusing the doppler. If they don't have a fetalscope, I can see them refusing me as a patient if I don't *let* them do anything except BP, pee, weight (and I usually don't allow that!) and my fundal height.

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Honestly, I would just start planning for the best hospital birth possible. I was very close to having to give up my homebirth due to BP issues with my last pregnancy. Sometimes there just aren't any more options and you have to make the best of what you have.
Thanks for that . It is a truth I need to stop running from. right now I am more dreading the prenatals than the hospital, but I do agree with the PP who said it wouldn't look great to go to the hospital in labor with NO prenatal care. And I don't think I can pull off the "I didn't know I was pregnant" routine.

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Good luck, mama! This sounds tough. I'd probably go to the doc close by I didn't like and see how things develop. If it looked like things were going to be hard and hostile, I'd switch to the doc I liked at the very end (34-36 wks) and deliver at the 'good' hospital- does that make sense???
I know the local hospital is a no-go for me, so i have to decide if I want to "pretend" I was going to deliver there....

<sigh>
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Old 01-10-2012, 03:50 PM   #26
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Re: Can't have a homebirth- what would you do?

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I plan on laboring at home as long as possible. We can't afford a homebirth and we only have one hospital in the area that isn't all that great. So yeah, labor at home as long as possible.

Otherwise, I hope things work out and that you can get into a good hospital. I'd plan for a really good hospital birth. There's a good book called "Homebirth in the Hospital." Check that out, it was helpful!
Thanks! believe it or not, the last hospital experience wasn't bad. It's the prenatals I dread and don't feel are necessary for me. And this time we will have the toddler at the birth, so that is a whole 'nother thing!
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Old 01-11-2012, 01:59 PM   #27
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Re: Can't have a homebirth- what would you do?

OP do you have a GP?

My (now former since we moved) GP doesn't deliver babies so his patients have to transfer to the prenatal clinic at the hospital. Most mamas start going there as soon as they get a BFP. BUT I didn't want to see someone else! What we worked out was that he did all the regular prenatal care (knowing full well he was NOT going to deliver) and then transferred me at the very end to the prenatal team. This worked for me 3 times! Once he just sent my file to the hospital since it was so late. Once he sent it to the other team. Once I hand carried it to my new team - he just printed and handed it to me.

IME - hospitals want to see that you have had some prenatal care but they generally don't care who does it as long as it has been done.

If I were you I would try to work with either your GP or a local nice Dr and then have them transfer your care to the OB you liked near the end. You can even explain that the hour drive, with other kids, and the cost of fuel is the reason you need to do this. Someone should understand!

Good luck!
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Old 01-11-2012, 02:04 PM   #28
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Re: Can't have a homebirth- what would you do?

For some reason I thought you lived in Hawaii? Anyway, have you looked into Birthcare in Alexandria? There are a couple of mw in your area. Have you called them all?
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Old 01-12-2012, 03:23 PM   #29
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Re: Can't have a homebirth- what would you do?

OP - are you local to me? I can give a bunch of recommendations, if so.
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Old 01-13-2012, 01:22 PM   #30
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Re: Can't have a homebirth- what would you do?

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Originally Posted by mom1mg View Post
OP do you have a GP?

My (now former since we moved) GP doesn't deliver babies so his patients have to transfer to the prenatal clinic at the hospital. Most mamas start going there as soon as they get a BFP. BUT I didn't want to see someone else! What we worked out was that he did all the regular prenatal care (knowing full well he was NOT going to deliver) and then transferred me at the very end to the prenatal team. This worked for me 3 times! Once he just sent my file to the hospital since it was so late. Once he sent it to the other team. Once I hand carried it to my new team - he just printed and handed it to me.

IME - hospitals want to see that you have had some prenatal care but they generally don't care who does it as long as it has been done.

If I were you I would try to work with either your GP or a local nice Dr and then have them transfer your care to the OB you liked near the end. You can even explain that the hour drive, with other kids, and the cost of fuel is the reason you need to do this. Someone should understand!

Good luck!
Thanks so much, mama . I kinda hinted to my family practice NP cuz she is pretty crunchy and they stopped doing births when the practice got too big. so idk if she is even allowed to do prenatal. I will bring it up again, bc I don't mind going that route at all! I did like the OB who delivered my last, but the drive, as I said and I only saw him once so I didn't have to deal with all the tests.

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For some reason I thought you lived in Hawaii? Anyway, have you looked into Birthcare in Alexandria? There are a couple of mw in your area. Have you called them all?
I wish . DH is Hawaiian/Samoan but we have to live here bc of joint custody of my teens.

I used birthcare with my 3rd and they have gotten a lot more medical minded over the years, but anywho, they don't take medicaid.

I am on a homebirth loop for Northern VA and no one had any suggestions, and I have talked to many MWs. I wish there were some who delivered in the hospital that I am planning to go to.

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OP - are you local to me? I can give a bunch of recommendations, if so.
Please feel free to message me! I have lived here my whole life and know a lot or of a lot of MWs here (I have met several over the years), but none that I have talked to seem able to help with the whole "medicaid" and OOP expenses that the MWs themselves charge. I was even dropped by a MW whom I LOVED last time (19 mo ago) bc "medicaid hasn't paid me for my last few births, so I am not going to do anymore medicaid births". She called me on the phone, the night before my 35 (or 36) week appt (knowing I go 2 wks early, typically), so that I "wouldn't show up and her have to tell me she was dropping me as a patient". Nice. And now that my BP is up (even though I am working on controlling it), I dunno if any will take me out of hospital anyway.

I know I need to get prenatal care soon. I am 19 wks and want to get on the books somewhere soon. DH just started a job bus driving and I have to take him all diff places in addition to the kids, so going somewhere not close to home is going to be even more challenging.
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