Reply Hey Mom! Learn more about the Gerber Life Insurance Grow-Up Plan!
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 01-10-2012, 08:24 AM   #1
Rewind_Selector's Avatar
Rewind_Selector
Registered Users
seller
seller
 
Join Date: May 2010
Posts: 1,665
My 5 yr old son was suspended today

Because he bit another child. He had to come home today and stay home tomorrow as well. I'm at a loss as to what kind of consequences he should have at home. He has never bitten before. Not even as a 1 or 2 year old when it is more common for kids to do that because of their lack of communication skills.
The child he did bite is the same child who has bitten him many times at school as well as where we live. When I asked him why he bit him he said " because he wouldn't move over so I could sit by my brother at breakfast. He tried to bite me but I got away and bit him instead."
Part of me understands why he did it, where he learned it, and that he was defending himself but he still needs a consequence because it is not acceptable.
Some advice?

Advertisement

__________________
ISO Patons VooDoo Yarn. Try me on colors.
Rewind_Selector is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-10-2012, 08:30 AM   #2
monkeymama07's Avatar
monkeymama07
Registered Users
seller
 
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: NOVA
Posts: 2,294
Re: My 5 yr old son was suspended today

I think I would remind him that he is not allowed to bite and see if you can get the school work (I know hes five) and have him sit down and do it. But otherwise I would let it be that he was punished at school and leave it at that.

Was the other child suspended or punished for trying to bit him or for the other times hes bit? IT seems drastic to suspend a kid for ONE offense. take away recess I get but bite someone who bites him seems drastic.

Does he feel bad for it? Quite frankly maybe the kid wont bite him again now that he knows your son wont be bullied and put up with the biting (seems mean but some kids dont learn until they get what they dish)
__________________
Single mama to an awesome 6 year old and fighting cancer one day at a time.
Looking for Womens clothes size Large 12/14.... any help would be appreciated
monkeymama07 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-10-2012, 08:31 AM   #3
monkeymama07's Avatar
monkeymama07
Registered Users
seller
 
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: NOVA
Posts: 2,294
Re: My 5 yr old son was suspended today

I wouldnt make it fun or rewad him in anyway though so if TV, game systems, etc would not be out until the other kids got home from school
__________________
Single mama to an awesome 6 year old and fighting cancer one day at a time.
Looking for Womens clothes size Large 12/14.... any help would be appreciated
monkeymama07 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-10-2012, 08:40 AM   #4
Rewind_Selector's Avatar
Rewind_Selector
Registered Users
seller
seller
 
Join Date: May 2010
Posts: 1,665
Re: My 5 yr old son was suspended today

Quote:
Originally Posted by monkeymama07 View Post
I think I would remind him that he is not allowed to bite and see if you can get the school work (I know hes five) and have him sit down and do it. But otherwise I would let it be that he was punished at school and leave it at that.

Was the other child suspended or punished for trying to bit him or for the other times hes bit? IT seems drastic to suspend a kid for ONE offense. take away recess I get but bite someone who bites him seems drastic.

Does he feel bad for it? Quite frankly maybe the kid wont bite him again now that he knows your son wont be bullied and put up with the biting (seems mean but some kids dont learn until they get what they dish)
The first time it happened I was called and told about it. The other mother (who lives here at the shelter we are at) didn't even know it had happened until my son went to her and told her. The second time he came home with a bite from him the school never called either of us and same as before he showed us the mark and the other boy (D) said that yes he did bite him.
__________________
ISO Patons VooDoo Yarn. Try me on colors.
Rewind_Selector is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-10-2012, 08:47 AM   #5
Rewind_Selector's Avatar
Rewind_Selector
Registered Users
seller
seller
 
Join Date: May 2010
Posts: 1,665
Re: My 5 yr old son was suspended today

The Behavior Specialist at the school who called me to come get him said he didn't know anything about the other incidents. I expressed how upset I was that he is suspended for doing the same thing to the kid that keeps getting done to him. And he sees that the other boy gets no consequence for it.
I just talked to my sons counselor about it and she agrees that he was probably trying to communicate with D in way he would understand.
__________________
ISO Patons VooDoo Yarn. Try me on colors.
Rewind_Selector is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-10-2012, 08:56 AM   #6
Nerissa
Registered Users
seller
 
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: small town USA
Posts: 5,419
My Mood:
Re: My 5 yr old son was suspended today

So why did your DS get suspended and not the other boy. If the other kid didn't get punished you DS shouldn't have either IMO. I would be calling the principal
__________________
wife and mom-- no other special labels. Just trying to do the best I can.
Nerissa is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-10-2012, 09:00 AM   #7
Nerissa
Registered Users
seller
 
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: small town USA
Posts: 5,419
My Mood:
Re: My 5 yr old son was suspended today

Quote:
Originally Posted by Rewind_Selector View Post
The Behavior Specialist at the school who called me to come get him said he didn't know anything about the other incidents. I expressed how upset I was that he is suspended for doing the same thing to the kid that keeps getting done to him. And he sees that the other boy gets no consequence for it.
I just talked to my sons counselor about it and she agrees that he was probably trying to communicate with D in way he would understand.
With this info, sounds like your DS knows its wrong but wasn't getting the other kid to quit any other way. I probably would just have a talk with him and not punish him any other way.

May have him do some "school like" activities at home.
__________________
wife and mom-- no other special labels. Just trying to do the best I can.
Nerissa is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-10-2012, 09:10 AM   #8
mcpforever's Avatar
mcpforever
Registered Users
seller
 
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Bama
Posts: 11,738
My Mood:
Re: My 5 yr old son was suspended today

Quote:
Originally Posted by Rewind_Selector View Post
The Behavior Specialist at the school who called me to come get him said he didn't know anything about the other incidents. I expressed how upset I was that he is suspended for doing the same thing to the kid that keeps getting done to him. And he sees that the other boy gets no consequence for it.
I just talked to my sons counselor about it and she agrees that he was probably trying to communicate with D in way he would understand.
I think it might be a good idea to impress upon your son how inappropriate the behavior was for both boys. Help him to understand that he needs to tell his teachers when it happens to him. Pushing, hitting, and biting are all offenses that should be reported to his teacher by him and do not fall into the category of tattling. He needs to know this so that the next time it happens to him, he can take action to protect himself without getting into trouble himself.
__________________
Melissa-Wife, mother to DS 4/02 and DD 4/07, DS 7/08 DD 7/13
ISO: my lost shaker of salt
mcpforever is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-10-2012, 09:12 AM   #9
monkeymama07's Avatar
monkeymama07
Registered Users
seller
 
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: NOVA
Posts: 2,294
Re: My 5 yr old son was suspended today

umm yay I would be speaking with the teacher and the principle the fact that biting is happening and that EVERYONE is not being punished in the same zero tolerence law would not be okay with me.

If a kid bit my son at school ONCE I would not want him suspended. put in time out and explained not to hurt people yeah.

now if he was biting my kid on a normal basis I would want him sit home or something more drastic but I dunno

I would not punish your son beyond telling him is not okay to bite and letting him know if he does again XYZ will happen
__________________
Single mama to an awesome 6 year old and fighting cancer one day at a time.
Looking for Womens clothes size Large 12/14.... any help would be appreciated
monkeymama07 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-10-2012, 09:13 AM   #10
luvsviola's Avatar
luvsviola
Registered Users
seller
seller
 
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Central Indiana
Posts: 17,103
My Mood:
Re: My 5 yr old son was suspended today

IMO (I'm a teacher) at 5 years old, staying home from school is consequence enough. I would talk to him several times throughout the day about ok communication methods, and what to do if he has a problem again (get a teacher). But I wouldn't have consequences at home beyond teachable moment conversations.
__________________
Kristen
Middle school teacher by day, super mom by night
Mommy to The Boss~2007, The Energizer Bunny~2009, and The Princess~2011
My kids are no longer in diapers, but somehow, my computer keeps finding its way back here...
luvsviola is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump

Copyright 2005 - 2014 Escalate Media. All Rights Reserved.