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Old 01-12-2012, 09:09 PM   #1
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Do the school meetings ever get easy?

I have a 7 year old aspergers and a 5 year old autistic boys. They have been in public preschool since they were 2.5 and 2.75, so I have been doing the big meetings for a long time now. Things are going better with my autistic son but there are still issues to focus on. My 7 year old seems to be the bigger issue. he is off-task a lot in class. he is average at math-reading-writing. The school is concerned about him, think he should be diagnosed adhd. I tried to explain that his main problem is his hyper-focus (apsergers) and so he daydreams about his hyper-focus topic. meds for adhd are not effective for hyper-focus. He has a little hyperactivity but really its less than most boys his age. he is really sensitive and cries when he realizes he isn't doing something wrong. he aslo has a hard time getting alogn with peers, mainly at recess, and gets upset easy.

We tried to explain that at home he learns well, is very nice, has friends over and does fine and they seemed in disbelief. This is a really great group of teachers and a great school. They were really pushing for an official diagnosis and counseling. See, our insurance does not pay for any treatment for aspergers or autism (they are considered developmental disabilities) so there are more opportunities for us to get him treatment if he is not official, but he easily meets criteria. I was tired of them looking for outside help, we had ideas to help him in class. They are willing to try giving him something to work on at his desk that is related to the topic she is instructing on. ugh, makes me want to pull his IEP and just not have one so I don't have to do this all the time.

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Old 01-12-2012, 10:14 PM   #2
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The IEP does provide him some protection though, especially without an official diagnosis. Without it he could potentially be subject to the school wide discipline plan that could lead to more frequent disciplinary issues, KWIM? Good luck mama! It's so hard!
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Old 01-12-2012, 10:30 PM   #3
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Re: Do the school meetings ever get easy?

Aww that doesn't sound fun. Hang in there!

From the school's perspective they have limited funding and want to teach as many kids with a cookie cutter approach as possible. If your son functions and learns in a different way than fits into a cookie cutter they would prefer he is medicated or something happens to help him conform. Sucky but it's their reality.

I don't know much about the medication piece of it, but that makes sense that a hyper-focus could look like ADHD, therefore not respond to Ritalin. I know that if it were my child I would want to look at as many options as possible and try to avoid meds. Lots of schools pressure the ADHD medication to make their job easier, but I would be quite wary too.

What lucky kids to have such wonderful parents that are so involved in their educations and will fight for them.
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Old 01-13-2012, 06:47 AM   #4
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Re: Do the school meetings ever get easy?

No, they don't get any easier. I've got 3 kids, 1 is on an IEP, one was moved from an IEP to a 504 last year (HUGE mistake), and one will be going down the IEP/504 route soon. They haven't gotten easier for me.
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Old 01-13-2012, 02:22 PM   #5
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Re: Do the school meetings ever get easy?

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Originally Posted by ralenth View Post
No, they don't get any easier. I've got 3 kids, 1 is on an IEP, one was moved from an IEP to a 504 last year (HUGE mistake), and one will be going down the IEP/504 route soon. They haven't gotten easier for me.
Why was it a huge mistake to go from an IEP to a 504 plan?
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Old 01-13-2012, 02:28 PM   #6
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Re: Do the school meetings ever get easy?

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Why was it a huge mistake to go from an IEP to a 504 plan?
They've lost the 504 paperwork, he's not getting social skills, the person running the 504 program is a joke (and they don't see to recognize aspergers as something causing him to need help). It's done nothing for my son. It looks like my daughter will be getting a 504, I am hoping it will be a better experience, I doubt it though.
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Old 01-13-2012, 04:06 PM   #7
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ralenth

They've lost the 504 paperwork, he's not getting social skills, the person running the 504 program is a joke (and they don't see to recognize aspergers as something causing him to need help). It's done nothing for my son. It looks like my daughter will be getting a 504, I am hoping it will be a better experience, I doubt it though.
A 504 plan is designed typical for children with physical medical disabilities who need modifications, like severe food allergies or chronic diseases. It is funded through general ed, not special ed, and so there is often less money. Sometimes children with ADHD have these as well if it's not severe enough to qualify for SPED services.
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Old 01-14-2012, 12:16 PM   #8
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Didn't read all the replies but chiming in. My 8 yr old has aspegers as well. Has been in early intervention for motor and sensory issues since 20 months, dx'd with aspergers at 4 1/2. I also have insurance now that doesn't cover any PDD yet due to a complete mental breakdown last fall he is on weekly counseling and seeing a psychiatrist as well. They can usually get coverage with other diagnosis codes. For example th social worker coded it as non specific anxiety as that was his main presentation. We have now moved onto a psychologist rather than her and they put the PDD diagnosis down as the main one with th anxiety, depression, attention problems listed after. Our insurance kicked it out as not covered, I told them and they are going to move th PDD part to the end of the list with the primary diagnosis being the anxiety and I am 99% sure it will go through. DH is a doc, insurance generally just looks at primary diagnosis as the reason for the visit. So speech can be for pronunciation problems, pt covered by coordination difficulties, etc. A formal diagnosis will help the school help you more as well. Having the label will not drop your insurance, they are not allowed to deny kids anymore no matter what, get your spectrum related services coded under comorbid diagnosis codes. Now if you are on individual plans as a family (no through an employer) it will most likely raise your rates at renewal.
As for the meetings, the get better and then setbacks and then better, etc. Gearing up for them even when dealing with the best team can still feel like battle hang in there
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Old 01-14-2012, 03:59 PM   #9
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Re: Do the school meetings ever get easy?

I like the idea of moving different diagnoses to primary. I wasn't worried that my insurance would drop him, just that none of the services would be covered, does that make sense.

We are doing some intense treatments with his brother for the next 5 weeks so I think we will actually wait to start any therapies until this summer. Thanks for the ideas
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