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Old 02-09-2012, 10:14 AM   #11
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Re: Hm. I wonder if we fall into 'non-traditional'?

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Congratulations! That's wonderful. I actually have a situation that's similar weirdly enough. My exhusband and I were married for several years, separated, divorced, and we've been dating for the last few months. It's just so strange I don't know what to think of it. The love never left. The marriage and the relationship needed SO much work and we gave up too fast and regretted it. And strangely enough, our relationship still has many many obstacles but it's so much stronger this time around. Proof positive that if you love each other enough and want it badly enough, you can overcome nearly anything.
HA! That's awesome.
The husband and I started dating again when we decided we were going to make things work. It was so much fun.

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Old 02-10-2012, 03:30 PM   #12
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Re: Hm. I wonder if we fall into 'non-traditional'?

I have heard of split couples dating and getting back together, even re-marrying after divorce. If you guys make it work, who cares? I will ask though, does the bio dad have ANY rights? Would hate for that to come back and haunt you.
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Old 02-10-2012, 03:51 PM   #13
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Re: Hm. I wonder if we fall into 'non-traditional'?

I don't think he has any right once the child is 2... IMHO he should not since he left anyway, and you were married and whatnot. I am glad you had the life support you needed while having your DS.
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Old 02-10-2012, 08:57 PM   #14
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congrats!
I always told my ODS that "in order to be a family, you have to make a good team. me and your father didn't make a good team..." - and you can be honest and say that DH *IS* family/team. and he IS daddy, for what matters. (((hug)))

please excuse any typos --> Sent from my iPhone using DS Forum
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Old 02-11-2012, 09:30 AM   #15
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Re: Hm. I wonder if we fall into 'non-traditional'?

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congrats!
I always told my ODS that "in order to be a family, you have to make a good team. me and your father didn't make a good team..." - and you can be honest and say that DH *IS* family/team. and he IS daddy, for what matters. (((hug)))
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Old 02-11-2012, 05:57 PM   #16
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Re: Hm. I wonder if we fall into 'non-traditional'?

Just come up with some specific retorts to those who are nosy! I get questions all of the time when people see my very dark hispanic 2 year old and the rest of my kids are pretty pale. They are all adopted (and I did nurse 1 of them). Many people close to us think only the youngest three are adopted because my oldest has a rare genetic disorder so they think we started adopting because of her genetics.

Tell him honestly as much as you are comfortable with while telling him he is loved and wanted. We have to edit out part of the real history with my kids because of their situations with regarding termination of parental rights.
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Old 02-22-2012, 12:13 PM   #17
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Re: Hm. I wonder if we fall into 'non-traditional'?

I wouldn't go into all the details when you explain it to him. It's not much different than having a sperm donor, KWIM? Just tell him your DH is his daddy. Then when he gets old and you tell him how daddy's give a part of themselve to help make the baby, you can tell him that someone else helped you make the baby but DH is still his daddy.
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Old 02-26-2012, 02:16 AM   #18
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Re: Hm. I wonder if we fall into 'non-traditional'?

I always told my ODS that "in order to be a family, you have to make a good team. me and your father didn't make a good team..." - and you can be honest and say that DH *IS* family/team. and he IS daddy, for what matters. (((hug)))

That is an AWESOME thing to tell your kids! My DH and I are solid, but this is exactly what I will tell my chillins about relationships. It's all about being a -team-. And it really is!
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Old 02-26-2012, 08:52 AM   #19
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Re: Hm. I wonder if we fall into 'non-traditional'?

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That is an AWESOME thing to tell your kids! My DH and I are solid, but this is exactly what I will tell my chillins about relationships. It's all about being a -team-. And it really is!

I agree.
DS1 is 4 and has asked several times about why/how DH and I decided to get married (this after asking me to marry him so he could be happy like daddy). When we explained that we work really well together and make a good team, he seemed to be ok with that answer.

Also, OT: I love your siggy. My DS2 was UC @home.
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Old 03-17-2012, 12:24 PM   #20
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Re: Hm. I wonder if we fall into 'non-traditional'?

What a beautiful story. Your husband is a keeper!
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