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Old 02-06-2012, 08:02 PM   #11
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Re: How do I handle this family member?

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Originally Posted by Michelle_M View Post
Ok, first of all, part of my choice to home school is so the pressure to perform at everyone else's pace is not there for my children.
I think you really need to tell her this and tell her you've decided against testing him altogether (even if you think you might do it at some point). She might freak a little at first, but at least it will be out in the open and you won't have to field the questions anymore.

I think she probably is trying...she wants to be supportive. You can tell since she's offered to buy things. She just doesn't really know how to be supportive. I would be more specific in what she can do. Tell her specifically what you need the next time she asks. Send a link to it on amazon or wherever. For cheap little things like the toy story book, don't even worry about it. Just let her know how much he liked it (even if he couldn't really learn from it) then forget about it.

Try to let her be a little involved. You don't want to focus much on science or history right now right? But what if you let grandma give him little mini "lessons"? Is she a civil war buff? Love the pioneer days? Knows all about rock music from the 70's? Let her give him a lesson. Or maybe even just have her tell him stories from when she was a little girl. Let her cook with him and call it home ec. My step-dad was grilling me one day over how A was doing and seemed a little skeptical that he could be learning everything he needed to know. I offered to let him do his science lesson that day and when they were done he seemed so happy about being able to teach him something...like it "clicked" that YEAH, regular people can teach kids stuff too! It was kind of cute, watching my dad get all excited and digging around in the kitchen for materials for his science lesson.

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Old 02-08-2012, 07:52 PM   #12
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Re: How do I handle this family member?

I am ready to add in science, history and geography, but she didn't buy that when it's what I asked for.

She is VERY into history, and I'd love to let her "help," but we're in Texas and she is in Florida.

Thanks for all of the great advice ladies!

God bless!
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Old 02-10-2012, 09:50 AM   #13
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Re: How do I handle this family member?

I'm sorry you're having a hard time with her... that must be hard with homeschooling, wanting support in your work, AND being pregnant with #4!

I am a super honest and direct person. If this was my MIL, and I really thought it would be (thank God mine is supportive!), I would tell her pretty much what you typed in this thread. I may write a letter though so she can absorb your point and there is no conversational response that would turn into a "discussion" about the points you make.

Can you just say "Look, I appreciate your trying to be so helpful with this. Here are our reasons for homeschooling. Here are our reasons for trusting our approach. Here are the state guidelines for these grades. Here is where ds is ahead, here he is on target, and here is where is behind at the moment. We are introducing history/geography/science/etc in the fall. If you want to purchase materials for us, you can go to this website, we could use this or that. Please feel free to ask about his progress or help anytime. But please do not put pressure on me to change anything, as I am worn a little thin with homeschooling and being pregnant, and we are very comfortable in the decision we have made. "

That is what I would do Also you said that she is active in church, and from your other posts I have read, I believe you are a praying mama Maybe if you tell her that you and your dh have prayed about their education and you feel God's leading in what you are doing with them, maybe she will feel a little better about it?
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