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Old 02-10-2012, 07:46 PM   #1
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"It's too hard."

Diciplining question.... I'm trying to raise my children to be responsible man and ladies.....



Time to do chore, or pick up the mess, or eat the veggie.... etc (Doesn't really matter the task) and your child says:

"I can't. It's too haaaaaaaard."




Would you mind sharing samples of your responce?

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Old 02-10-2012, 07:51 PM   #2
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Re: "It's too hard."

"I know you can do it. Let me know if you need help."

Then I'd walk away and give them time.
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Old 02-10-2012, 07:54 PM   #3
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Re: "It's too hard."

I have said things like " We wouldn't ask you to do a task you couldn't do" I have also been known to say " this is not a choice". I am big on offering age appropriate choices for the children but some things are not a choice.
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Old 02-10-2012, 07:56 PM   #4
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Re: "It's too hard."

I insist the children try (really try) at least once. If they truly cannot do it, they are always allowed to ask for help, so long as they ask politely.
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Old 02-10-2012, 09:34 PM   #5
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Re: "It's too hard."

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Old 02-10-2012, 10:06 PM   #6
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Re: "It's too hard."

We've been making him ask for help. "Don't just say 'I can't', if you need help - ask."

It works for some things but not others.
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Old 02-10-2012, 10:27 PM   #7
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Re: "It's too hard."

Quote:
Originally Posted by USMCgirl_05 View Post
"Well I guess you better try harder then!"

I am not very receptive to "I can't".
Sounds like my house.
I need you to pick up the toys off the living room floor, so I can vacuum.
If it doesn't get done I ask again and remind them, anything left for me to pick up belongs to me and I can throw it out/give it to so and so. So just pick up the stuff you want to keep.
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Old 02-11-2012, 07:49 AM   #8
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Re: "It's too hard."

My answer is usually something along the lines of "when you show me you have tried, then I will come help you but since you are 4 years old you can try before whining"
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Old 02-11-2012, 08:51 AM   #9
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Re: "It's too hard."

Quote:
Originally Posted by MCR View Post
Sounds like my house.
I need you to pick up the toys off the living room floor, so I can vacuum.
If it doesn't get done I ask again and remind them, anything left for me to pick up belongs to me and I can throw it out/give it to so and so. So just pick up the stuff you want to keep.
I tried that with my 4yr old. So now when I tell her to take the toys back to her room or put them back on the shelf she'll say 'I dont want those anymore.' It could be her fav toys and she'd still say that just b/c she doesnt want to pick up......*sigh*...I guess I'm just going to have to bite the bullet and actually start giving everything away(I havent been able to bring myself to giving away her $$ toys or those from family who've passed away ) . Cant wait to hear even more whining and crying

Quote:
Originally Posted by tallanvor View Post
I insist the children try (really try) at least once. If they truly cannot do it, they are always allowed to ask for help, so long as they ask politely.
I do the same. If they cry about it they get sent to their room until they can ask! for help.
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Last edited by my2sweets; 02-11-2012 at 08:53 AM.
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Old 02-11-2012, 09:02 AM   #10
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Re: "It's too hard."

Quote:
Originally Posted by my2sweets View Post
I tried that with my 4yr old. So now when I tell her to take the toys back to her room or put them back on the shelf she'll say 'I dont want those anymore.' It could be her fav toys and she'd still say that just b/c she doesnt want to pick up......*sigh*...I guess I'm just going to have to bite the bullet and actually start giving everything away(I havent been able to bring myself to giving away her $$ toys or those from family who've passed away ) . Cant wait to hear even more whining and crying

I do the same. If they cry about it they get sent to their room until they can ask! for help.
Instead of actually giving them away, try making her do chores or a system where she has to listen and be good all day to earn them back! (and of course, no new toys, even for birthday or Christmas, when any toys are being held pending chores)
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