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Old 02-24-2012, 02:25 PM   #121
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Re: Marchkins Chat 2/20-2/26

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Well that's just it. Lol our first kiddies were transitioned into toddler beds by 15-18 months. Our third will be 21 months next week and still happily sleeping in his crib and has never attempted to climb out. Yep. And we've been more than happy to keep him there. Sort of dreading the transition. It's going to be interesting to say the least.

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I say it's no biggie... and not to rush them unless you really need the crib. DS slept in his crib until he was 2 1/2, and then we just took the side off and lowered the mattress so he could get out when he wanted to. From there he went straight to his twin bed and he LOVES it. He sprawls out on it like a king, and always hated a toddler bed. But he liked laying up against the crib, so it was weird. But I didn't mind at all he was in it forever. As long as he was happy.

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Old 02-24-2012, 02:29 PM   #122
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Re: Marchkins Chat 2/20-2/26

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I'm really not forseeing this whole adding a baby to the mix thing going well. DS already punches me in the belly/baby when he's mad at me. What's he going to do to it when its out and taking up "his" attention!???? I won't be able to leave baby anywhere near him!
Oh, YIKES, I would get working on that asap. I would start putting harsh punishments in place for any violent behavior. I have heard of children getting violent with babies if they do that with the parents as well. You can't watch baby 24/7, so he HAS to know that behavior like that is completely unacceptable.

We don't spank unless it's serious, but we do 'fair' parenting (I'm not sure what to call it). If DS smacks me, I smack him back. It lets him feel what I feel when he does it to me. And it works. He kicked DH in the leg, DH kicked him back. He hasn't done it since. We don't do it at an adult level of kicking, but at the same level he did to us. So it's not super painful, but we do it fast so it's a stunner to him. And then we explain why we did it (because you did it to mommy/daddy) and why it's not nice (because it hurts).

Maybe that would help?
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Old 02-24-2012, 02:33 PM   #123
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Re: Marchkins Chat 2/20-2/26

I was supposed to go in Tuesday for an OB appt, but I ONLY want the female DR that I really love, and she didn't have an appt until next Friday. But I really want a cervical check because I"m curious if I'm dilated or not. I'm actually really excited for my appt, and wonder if I will make it to next Friday. If I get everything done I need to this weekend and next week, I'd love to go into labor next weekend.

Going into labor during the week scares me. DH will be at work, so I'll have to call him home. Or it will be in the middle of the night, and DH will be exhausted and not very helpful. And my Mom has to come watch DS, and she lives 3 hours away. So hopefully my labor is long enough I can get her here, but not too long that she has to be here for a super long time and not be able to get back to my younger siblings who still need Mom around (the youngest is 8, there are 7 of us total).
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Old 02-24-2012, 06:11 PM   #124
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Re: Marchkins Chat 2/20-2/26

We moved DD to a toddler bed at 19 months and then to a big girl bed at about 2 1/2. It worked well for us.
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Old 02-24-2012, 06:58 PM   #125
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Re: Marchkins Chat 2/20-2/26

I'm just going to write a quick vent. I use to handle the money all myself, and I was a HORRIBLE spender. We barely made it to the next paycheck, and I was even working myself, making as much as DH. All wasted. Over the last year, I got MUCH better. It was after I lost my job that I realized how horrible I was with it. I started a financial program (DR), and really looked at our finances. We were able to get to each paycheck without running out of food in between, or having utilities shut off (how embarassing).

I caught us up on bills (we were WAY overdue on all of them), and started getting a little in savings. Our tax refund this year was going to catch us up, pay for a much needed dental visit for DH, and give us our first small savings account for emergencies ($1K).

DH decided to take over the bills himself, and his paychecks go into his own account I can't see. He also pays the bills himself. I have NO idea why he decided to take it all over, but he did. His excuse "I'm taking care of you now". Yeah, right. Our $2K refund is completely gone, and none of it went into savings or is available for the dental procedure.

I asked how much DH had today total since he just got paid, and he only has enough to pay bills this month. How on EARTH did that happen? It's like we are back to Square 1. I'm SO depressed. I worked my entire pregnancy (which I have never been able to do before), and I feel like it was a waste. It DID catch us up, but now I will have to find a job after I have this baby, just so we can get by.

I asked to sit down with him tonight to go through our bills this month, see where we are at and such, and he doesn't want 'help'. He's going to pay bills and take care of it.

GRRR... I am SO frustrated!! I've decided to let it go for NOW, and address it later. No way in heck am I going to let him run things, he's doing a horrible job already. I want us to be able to pay off debt and we need to live frugally. He has no problem spending $50 to go out to eat and there I am.. slaving over washing cloth diapers or selling stuff on craigslist just to MAKE $50.

Ok.. just needed to vent.
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Old 02-24-2012, 09:31 PM   #126
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Re: Marchkins Chat 2/20-2/26

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I'm just going to write a quick vent. I use to handle the money all myself, and I was a HORRIBLE spender. We barely made it to the next paycheck, and I was even working myself, making as much as DH. All wasted. Over the last year, I got MUCH better. It was after I lost my job that I realized how horrible I was with it. I started a financial program (DR), and really looked at our finances. We were able to get to each paycheck without running out of food in between, or having utilities shut off (how embarassing).

I caught us up on bills (we were WAY overdue on all of them), and started getting a little in savings. Our tax refund this year was going to catch us up, pay for a much needed dental visit for DH, and give us our first small savings account for emergencies ($1K).

DH decided to take over the bills himself, and his paychecks go into his own account I can't see. He also pays the bills himself. I have NO idea why he decided to take it all over, but he did. His excuse "I'm taking care of you now". Yeah, right. Our $2K refund is completely gone, and none of it went into savings or is available for the dental procedure.

I asked how much DH had today total since he just got paid, and he only has enough to pay bills this month. How on EARTH did that happen? It's like we are back to Square 1. I'm SO depressed. I worked my entire pregnancy (which I have never been able to do before), and I feel like it was a waste. It DID catch us up, but now I will have to find a job after I have this baby, just so we can get by.

I asked to sit down with him tonight to go through our bills this month, see where we are at and such, and he doesn't want 'help'. He's going to pay bills and take care of it.

GRRR... I am SO frustrated!! I've decided to let it go for NOW, and address it later. No way in heck am I going to let him run things, he's doing a horrible job already. I want us to be able to pay off debt and we need to live frugally. He has no problem spending $50 to go out to eat and there I am.. slaving over washing cloth diapers or selling stuff on craigslist just to MAKE $50.

Ok.. just needed to vent.
OMG that would be so frustrating! My husband likes to think that he's good with the budget also, but really he's not. He tells me EVERY month that he's going to spend less money on his snacks and lunches, and then he doesn't. I spend good money on good food, and he doesn't want to eat it half of the time. Claire and I eat at home mostly, and if we didn't, we wouldn't be able to pay the bills! It's ridiculous how much money we spend on food.
We've looked at the finances and it's going to be tough- pretty much I can't afford to work and pay childcare, and I can't afford to not work. I'm really hoping that my husband can get a different job this year and a raise so that he can support us, because I have no idea how it's going to work otherwise! I am terrible with businesses, also, so even though I have marketable hobbies/skills, I just can't seem to make anything out of them.
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Old 02-24-2012, 09:55 PM   #127
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On the toddler bed front, ds turned 2 last month and he is still in his crib. He is a very active kid, but has never tried to climb out bc he loves it in there. He has a soother that he loves and sleeps at least 12 hours/night and sometimes stays in there for a half hour or more after he wakes up just hanging out. as we are pl'ing this is changing though bc even though he gets a sposie at night, he is starting to want to get up and go potty. We will be moving his crib into his future room (currently the office) very soon. His room right now doubles as our guest room, and we are expecting our in-laws to stay over a bit when the baby is born. This makes me pretty nervous and I hate to displace ds when baby comes, but dh keeps assuring me that it will all work out. I sure hope so. And if ds climbs out of his crib I guess we will just take down the one side and go from there.

Hugs for your dh being weird abut the finances. I used to do the finances and I was a pretty bad spender as well, but all the bills got paid. I just wasn't making any good headway on the debt. Then dh got laid off right after ds was born. With me not working and dh on unemployment I felt like he needed to have a better understanding of where we stood financially so I asked him to take it over. He hash done a pretty good job with it, but I ask him to keep me updated and make it very clear what my priorities are. It really stinks and I can see how frustrating it must be that your dh is wanting to make unilateral decisions. If you have certain goals for family income I think you deserve to be heard and considered before the $ is spent. Especially if the $ is just going to eating out and casual spending. My dh likes to eat out too, and just this past week I ended up spending more at the grocery than he wanted me to and we had a big discussion about eating in instead of eating out. A lot of $ can just get waisted by going out. I understand that he works very hard, but we budget for "entertainment" and we need to stick to it. Anyway, ((hugs)) to you and I hope you can both get to a point where you are comfortable with how things are handled especially if you are expected to go back to work after baby is born.

AFM- so I took the double does of the gentle lax today around 1:30pm. Took a nap and woke up having to go. I had diarrhea, but cramping was not too bad and not many ctx. It took effect faster than I thought it would so I started with the pump. That was around 4:45. Stayed on for 30 min, took a 15min break to help dh shower with ds, and went back on for about an hour. Had lots of ctx, but none of then were particularly cramps/painful. Took a break to heat up some dinner and ctx continued pretty regularly (maybe every 3-5min). After we ate dinner I got back on the pump for 1.5hr, took a 30 min break that included several trips to the bathroom, and got back on the pump for another hour. For a lot of that time I was having ctx every 5 min, and sustained that through the break. But things were actually slowing down as I was pumping so I decided to pack it in for the night. Ctx were pretty strong, but I didn't feel anything in my cervix so I guess I am just not ready. Baby was getting pretty squeezed in there, and he is hopping around not that things have calmed down. Going to get some walking in tomorrow at the mall. Still hoping to go this weekend before dh leaves on Tuesday and my ob has another induction talk with me.

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Old 02-24-2012, 11:53 PM   #128
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Re: Marchkins Chat 2/20-2/26

Thanks for all the toddler bed sharing! It's been helpful! He's perfectly content and I think we're going to just leave it that way till newbie comes and after for a while to kind keep up the usual routine without throwing too much off all at once. Marchkin will be staying in our room for a while anyway so it's not a matter of needing the bed "just" yet but we will need it eventually.

**I'm really sorry to hear about the financial yuckies between you and your DH. Those are NO fun!!! EVER!!! My DH used to do the finances until he messed them up once and it was such a mess that we couldn't even figure out together what exactly he had done. Things bounced and overdrafted...it was horrible!!!! We opened another account (per the bank manager's advice...family aquaintance) to allow things to settle down and actually see what we had. So we just let things go for a couple months in the crazy account till it all settled down and we could figure out what we actually had and didn't have while using the new account to pay bills and keep tabs on our current money.

After that I took over the bills. I was really good at it but we were both spenders. Not really HUGE things...just nickle and diming ourselves to death.
Then we went the the financial peace program (DR) and it completely changed EVERYTHING for us. We got current on everything and in 13 months paid off all our debt except the house. It was insane. We basically didn't "do" anything (eating out...movies...fun stuff) and we cut back MAJORLY on everything! We cut out any expenses that were unessecary and went with it. I'll be honest...it was NOT fun...but every time we'd pay something else off it was SO FREEING!
Over the Christmas holiday this past year we got a little crazy and back on the nickle and diming ourselves to death where there would be "just" enough to get by and none for extra in the bank or on the house. So THIS month the both of us finally sat down together and decided we would do combined budgeting every single month so we would BOTH know what was going on, how much we had, and what it was getting spent on. I love it! I feel better knowing that he's aware of the finances and I'm the 'nerd' who enjoys working up the budget and making charts and stuff.
At first he had talked about taking it over but I just couldn't emotionally handle that. I like knowing what's going on too.
Hope you guys can work something out that works for the BOTH of you!
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