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Old 02-24-2012, 10:09 AM   #1
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My family dislikes the name we've picked...

I'm very close to my family and I don't know if we should reconsider this baby's name to make them happy. They think I made a mistake 16 years ago when I named my first daughter - and they still give me grief about it.

The problem is... my sister's name is Alana (pronounced Uh - lan - uh).
I named my first daughter Amanda. They think the names sound too much alike and that it has led to confusion and a frequent mixing up of names. We decided to name this little one Eliana (El - ee - on - uh) and my sister and my mother think the name is again too similar and they don't like it.

My husband, daughter, and I all far prefer Eliana to any other name we've considered. We tried explaining to the family that she'll probably be called Ellie or Ella most of the time, but they just give me disapproving looks.

Would you reconsider your chosen name to make your family happy?

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Old 02-24-2012, 10:16 AM   #2
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Re: My family dislikes the name we've picked...

Not a chance would I reconsider. It's your baby, you get to name her. They can name their own babies We already know that we will be given grief about this baby's name since we had the same thing last time around. Our first and second both have the same initials and it wasn't at all planned, but lots think that it was...well this time around it is planned for this one to have the same initials as well, and even though people don't know what we are naming him, we are already getting the "you better not give this one the same initials as the other two." We don't care, we love our kiddos names. We don't always like others name choices either, but I would NEVER dream of saying that to anyone.

ETA~Very cute name you have picked out!
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Old 02-24-2012, 10:17 AM   #3
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Re: My family dislikes the name we've picked...

No. We named our son Linford Joseph, and when we told my MIL she said, "Ew! I'm going to call him Joey." We ignored it, persistently called him by his real name- no shortening, no nicknames, and they got over it. It's his name. We are his parents.

If they are still giving you grief, after all these years, maybe you could consider adressing them directly. Maybe a letter or card would work if you were too shy or uncomfortable to do it in person. Just say, "We give our children names that we love, that we think they will treasure as they grow. It hurts my feelings when you reject this important expression of our family identity. Please accept my choice for my child's names and keep your thoughts to yourself."
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Old 02-24-2012, 10:19 AM   #4
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Re: My family dislikes the name we've picked...

Due date crashing...

I am of two minds on this.

First, who cares if they don't like it. My family didn't like the name I picked for DD2, but it's her name, DH and I like it and we like it more every day. And my entire family hates my boy name choice, Josiah, saying it's "too biblical" for our non religious family. Whatever. My kids, I push them out, my choice. That's one of the privileged I get for carrying the responsibility of parenting them.

But on the other hand...I DO see where they are coming from in this case. It seems like their concern isn't so much a distaste for the name, rather a concern about confusion. I DISAGREE that Amanda and Alana are so close as to create confusion, but I absolutely see how Alana, and Eliana can be seen as so close together. And at this point, you have picked a name that's even closer to your sister's name than you did the first time, AFTER hearing all the grief about the first one, I can see how it would bug them more. Despite planning to call Ellie, to me, Alana, and Eliana, are very nearly the same name. They aren't the same name, I do see the differences...I just also see how very similar they really are. Using a name so similar this "second" time around after having this problem the first time around, I can see how they might think you might even be doing it on purpose, just to irk them off. I am NOT, NOT, saying you are, just saying I can see how they might think that.


ETA: I LOVE the name Eliana, and if it wasn't so close to our DD2's name (Raeanna) then I would consider that for this one, if it's a girl.
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Old 02-24-2012, 10:24 AM   #5
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Re: My family dislikes the name we've picked...

I wouldn't even mention it to them =) it is a pretty name & if you guys like it GO FOR IT...we have told everyone we have no idea what the name will be when it is very likely the girl name is set & the boy name is between two.
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Old 02-24-2012, 10:38 AM   #6
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Re: My family dislikes the name we've picked...

No way would I change the name. Your baby, your choice. Close names don't bother me either. It's not like they are going to be side-by-side their entire lives. If it becomes a problem, you can always come up with a nickname for one or both for when they are together.
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Old 02-24-2012, 10:56 AM   #7
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ddc crashing my sisters name is Kacie Elizabeth and we named dd2 Kelsie Elizabeth....if those two names aren't close, I don't know what two are! we did name her after my sister though and there hasn't been any confusion! Is your sister an adult or child? It may be different if she is a child, (calling their name, they both come running or each child wanting to have their 'own' name even I'd they are different) but if not I don't see anything wrong with it and you should name your baby whatever you would like!
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Old 02-24-2012, 10:57 AM   #8
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Re: My family dislikes the name we've picked...

Eliana is a beautiful name - it is your child, name her what you want, and don't worry about anyone giving you frief over it. It's sad that after so many years they are hassling you over your other child's name. Even if the names sound similar, what's the confusion? They are different people! I wouldn't like my family giving me a hard time about a name I chose for my child, but at the same time, if it was the name my husband and I were set on, I wouldn't let anyone talk me out of it or change my mind. They need to get over it and be supportive whether they like the baby's name or not! And if they still have a problem with it just know the issue is theirs to deal with, not yours. Good luck to you mama, whatever you and your husband decide! :-)
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Old 02-24-2012, 11:21 AM   #9
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Re: My family dislikes the name we've picked...

never!! i would never give in to family in a case like yours...that would make them believe that they can talk you into anything else!

my family didn't really like dd2 name at first...now they all love it...

one way we try to avoid the naming issue was to not tell people what we are considering until we had it pretty much picked out...like other posters have said...its our baby..name it whatever you want!
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Old 02-24-2012, 11:26 AM   #10
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Re: My family dislikes the name we've picked...

Would you reconsider your chosen name to make your family happy?
nope not a chance! they had their turn, now its yours!
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