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Old 03-05-2012, 02:25 AM   #11
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It's our first and everyone is thrilled. Most people knew we wanted one badly and were over the moon when we told them! First grand baby for my dad and second on DH's mom's side but first for his dad. His grandparent's are thrilled too. My aunt (basically closest person I have to a mom since my mom has passed) is beyond excited.

I'm sorry that people have gotten negative reactions and I know they will come around once they see ultrasounds and that little baby come October.

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Old 03-05-2012, 07:12 AM   #12
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Re: Family Reactions

My family was very sweet. My in-laws were positive, but MIL has thrown a few snarky jabs in. For instance, when someone bumped into her that had heard our good news, they asked if the baby was planned (so DAMN rude), and she said SHE DIDN'T THINK SO! When I corrected her, she was really snippy. This is our fifth baby, but her daughter has SIX! She told me she was just shocked because our youngest is going to be four, so why did we wait so long.

Really? Do I need to give you a reason?

And yeah, after four babies, we are getting a lot of 'crazy' remarks. And of course the 'you know what causes that..' Oh gag.

I just say "Yup, and we're AWESOME at it."
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Old 03-05-2012, 09:43 AM   #13
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Originally Posted by kymdenise
My family was very sweet. My in-laws were positive, but MIL has thrown a few snarky jabs in. For instance, when someone bumped into her that had heard our good news, they asked if the baby was planned (so DAMN rude), and she said SHE DIDN'T THINK SO! When I corrected her, she was really snippy. This is our fifth baby, but her daughter has SIX! She told me she was just shocked because our youngest is going to be four, so why did we wait so long.

Really? Do I need to give you a reason?

And yeah, after four babies, we are getting a lot of 'crazy' remarks. And of course the 'you know what causes that..' Oh gag.

I just say "Yup, and we're AWESOME at it."
Hahahahahahaha! I love that last comment! I think it is pretty rude that people think it is their business whether or not your baby was planned. I'm honest with people if they asked, but I told my family to please not volunteer that information because it's personal and it sounds like we don't want our baby. But jeez, who asks that??
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Old 03-05-2012, 10:07 AM   #14
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Re: Family Reactions

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Originally Posted by Caroline11009 View Post
I'm sorry that people have gotten negative reactions and I know they will come around once they see ultrasounds and that little baby come October.
That is totally true- people's negative feelings usually go away by the time there's a sweet cuddly baby in the picture. I just wish the pregnancy didn't have to be so dramatic for others when it's not dramatic for me!

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My family was very sweet. My in-laws were positive, but MIL has thrown a few snarky jabs in. For instance, when someone bumped into her that had heard our good news, they asked if the baby was planned (so DAMN rude), and she said SHE DIDN'T THINK SO! When I corrected her, she was really snippy. This is our fifth baby, but her daughter has SIX! She told me she was just shocked because our youngest is going to be four, so why did we wait so long.
I have NO IDEA where people get off asking if a child was planned or not! That is just the rudest thing I can imagine, and once the pregnancy is there, and wanted, what could it possibly matter? It's like they're asking you "So, how good are you at birth control?" or something. Gah, so rude.
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Old 03-05-2012, 10:25 AM   #15
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Re: Family Reactions

When we told my family (like 3 years ago) that we wanted to have one more we got all sorts of snotty remarks about over population and didn't we think 3 was enough... sigh. Then when I finally got pregnant I got the same kind of snotty remarks. "Don't you know what causes this?" "Trying for your own soccer team?" and of course, lectures about over population- which just pisses me off coming from raging republicans who don't even recycle much less give 2 thoughts about their carbon footprint at all! :/ But then I lost that baby at 17w and I think that softened everyone up a bit. That was a hard time for everyone. Add another MC and months of fertility treatments... and yeah, NOW everyone is ecstatic for us. Lol!

DHs family is always happy and supportive of anything we do- but we haven't told them yet. Go figure :P
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Old 03-05-2012, 11:42 AM   #16
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Re: Family Reactions

Both my family and DH's were happy for us, but also acted like it wasn't a big deal, which was weird. When we announced to DH's family they were like "oh yeah, we thought you probably were for a while now" or "we were wondering when we were going to hear this announcement". They are very happy and excited, but it was just a strange moment, and it's really been like that with both our families and the few friends we've told - almost the first thing out of everyone's mouth is something along the lines of "we knew this was coming". Well WE didn't know it was coming! We wanted another baby but it takes a while for me to get pg so we were surprised! Sort of takes the wind out of your sails when people act like it's no big deal! But no one is rude or unsupportive - I feel so bad for those of you whose families are not happy and excited for you
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Old 03-05-2012, 05:25 PM   #17
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Re: Family Reactions

I am blessed. We got happy screams from all.

It is such a shame how babies are looked at as a burden rather than a joy by sooooo many people. And it is also a shame to hear that Catholics would NOT be over-joyed at the gift of life (this coming from a Catholic), regardless of whether or not it is within marriage. Too often "conservative" means "judgmental". I just don't get it. If they are devout, they should read the Bible and find that one of Jesus' main messages was not to judge other people but to work on your own flaws.

Yes, I am blessed. I am so sorry for any negative comments you ladies have to suffer.

The mom of the boy I babysit asked me if it was planned and I felt that her "Congratulations" was a bit canned. I never thought of the question of it being planned as a bad question (for the most part), but when I actually heard it, it did seem negative although I can't explain why. It was just a vibe I got.... As if she was irritated that we didn't consult her first, but this is all mere speculation.
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Old 03-05-2012, 05:31 PM   #18
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Re: Family Reactions

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I am blessed. We got happy screams from all.

It is such a shame how babies are looked at as a burden rather than a joy by sooooo many people. And it is also a shame to hear that Catholics would NOT be over-joyed at the gift of life (this coming from a Catholic), regardless of whether or not it is within marriage. Too often "conservative" means "judgmental". I just don't get it. If they are devout, they should read the Bible and find that one of Jesus' main messages was not to judge other people but to work on your own flaws.

Yes, I am blessed. I am so sorry for any negative comments you ladies have to suffer.

The mom of the boy I babysit asked me if it was planned and I felt that her "Congratulations" was a bit canned. I never thought of the question of it being planned as a bad question (for the most part), but when I actually heard it, it did seem negative although I can't explain why. It was just a vibe I got.... As if she was irritated that we didn't consult her first, but this is all mere speculation.
People are so weird. I had a friend... not even a horribly close friend, get his feelings hurt because I had told my BEST friend before him. What? LOL!

Also, I was asked ALL. THE. TIME. if Ruby was planned. She was 8 years younger then my youngest and I think mostly people were just curious. I don't think it was malicious at all- and it honestly, never offended me. People just like to know how other's families came to be... mostly. Obviously there are those people out there who are just trying to find ways to put you down, but I like to ignore them. :P
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Old 03-05-2012, 05:39 PM   #19
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Re: Family Reactions

My entire family, plus DH's family, has been beyond supportive of us doing a surrogacy. We haven't had one single negative comment (oh, wait - we did have one in the very beginning. When I first told my dad that I was going to be a surrogate, he said, "so basically you're going to become a prostitute?" ) He has since come to understand surrogacy a bit more and is now supportive.
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Old 03-05-2012, 09:25 PM   #20
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My entire family, plus DH's family, has been beyond supportive of us doing a surrogacy. We haven't had one single negative comment (oh, wait - we did have one in the very beginning. When I first told my dad that I was going to be a surrogate, he said, "so basically you're going to become a prostitute?" ) He has since come to understand surrogacy a bit more and is now supportive.
LOL! Men..... Good for you, who're the future parents?
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