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Old 07-16-2012, 07:53 AM   #51
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Re: I did not want to spend my next pregnancy terrified

I have not read ALL of the posts, but many are saying the same thing...get support and advocate for yourself. I STRONGLY RECOMMEND THIS BOOK ( http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/redirect?link_code=ur2&camp=1789&tag=chrisficti-20&creative=9325&path=http://www.amazon.com/Ina-Mays-Guide-Childbirth-Gaskin/dp/0553381156)!!![/url] I had a terrible experience with my c/s (not as bad as you, poor thing!) and I am VERY fearful of the +4% chance of major complications with a repeat c/s versus the .4%-.7% chance of Uterine Rupture. I am trying for a VBAC (bka FIGHTING WITH EVERYONE). I am not kidding you, read this book and you will feel like a different woman, one who is capable of anything...

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Old 07-16-2012, 08:22 AM   #52
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Re: I did not want to spend my next pregnancy terrified

I was an emergency c sect with my first. My water broke and I went into labor on my own. 12 hours in I was totally effaced 8 cm dilated stuck at 0 position and baby heart was crashing. It was terrible. My DS went directly to NICU.

my second was planned c section it was so peaceful. The recovery was better but still a c sec recovery. We were going to VBAC went 40wks and baby still wasn't positioned in a way to take the chance.

A planned c sec you can control for the most part. Honestly I would rather have a VBAC but in my circumstance it was not what was best for ds2 so we opted for safest for him.

You might want to consider counseling to help you work through your fears before labor or c csec.

I would say my 2nd birth was redeeming from my 1st birth that was pretty traumatic.

If we have a third I will look into VBAC again but VBAC after 2 c sec is very uncommon here.
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Old 07-16-2012, 08:32 AM   #53
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Re: I did not want to spend my next pregnancy terrified

I have not read through all the posts, but here is what I would do in your situation.
Get Hypnobabies. Then you will at least learn techniques that you need to stay calm and not panic. Maybe pick up or order some Rescue Remedy. Completely safe herbal compound to help your body deal with stress and anxiety.
Then interview as many providers as you can. Find one you feel the most comfortable with, one who is willing to listen.
When birth finally comes around, wait. One of the biggest mistakes moms these days do is to go into the hospital as soon as they feel contractions. Labor can last a long time, and the sooner you are at the hospital, the sooner you will be put on a timer.
It is YOUR body, and YOUR birth. Let it play out how you choose. From my experience, and from what I've recently learned while preparing to become a CPM, VBACs go a little slower because your body knows best. Let it happen as it needs and show up to the hospital ready for the home stretch.
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Old 07-16-2012, 08:41 AM   #54
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Re: I did not want to spend my next pregnancy terrified

I dont think I have time to get it, its not sold in Europe. I looked for a used set for a long time. Ordering new would take up to 2 months to get to me.
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Old 08-31-2012, 02:19 AM   #55
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Re: I did not want to spend my next pregnancy terrified

Outside of everyone else's advice, I would add that you should research what a normal birth is like. Watch birth videos. Get yourself and whoever will be with you familiar with what happens. Even if it's your mom, it's been decades since she's given birth, so a refresher is needed.

The panic that you felt, for example, could be due to many things, but most likely it was either a) not feeling safe there AND/OR b) transition. This is the part where many, many women start freaking out, start talking about wanting to go home, screaming, begging, etc. It's actually a good sign that the baby is on its way. However, for people who don't know this, this can be terrifying. Having someone there who can remind you that this is a good sign baby is coming closer, may have helped.

That said, each birth is different. I've had three, 2 of which were full term and ended in c/s, each for a different reason. Even each c/s was different. Just because your first birth was horrible, doesn't mean your second one will be, or that your labor will even be similar. My first I labored all of 3 hours, naturally. My second I was induced, labored for 22 hours, then c/s for failure to progress. My third, I went into labor naturally, 40 some odd hours later his heart rate began crashing after each contraction, and elected for a c/s. My third labor was horrifically horrible back labor. I would take my 22 hours of straight pitocin labor with no pain meds over that.

I don't want to scare you with that last bit, I just wanted to show you that just because you had one type of labor before, does not mean it will happen again this time around.

With Germans, do not be afraid to be direct and a '*****' (what Americans would define as one). There you have to speak bluntly, it's the way they communicate. Also, see if you can talk to your OB about pain med management. The OB on staff might be an ***, but if your OB can put it in your charts/take over soon after birth, you may not have to worry about the pain med situation.

I'm curious how much ibuprofen they had you on? If it helps, I seem to be immune to narcotics. No idea why, but morphine, etc, don't help with my pain. No one listed to me either after each c/s, and for the first 24hrs that's what you get. I completely feel for you. By the end of those 24 hrs I'm sobbing and ready to kill someone for some damn advil. My OB prescribed 800 mg taken 2-3 times per day, on an 'as needed' basis. It helped so much. I only took one vicodin for the first 2 days after the 24hr hell periods, but it helps.
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