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Old 03-17-2012, 10:35 AM   #11
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Re: Should I say something?

I would speak to the librarian...is it possible that she didn't say "you are fat" but that is what your dd interpreted it as and therefore reported it to you as that? If the librarian said, "what a cute little belly you have" I would not be as upset. Is the librarian an older woman? Remember the older generation was not obsessed with body image like our generation and a "cute little belly" means just that to them.

I would have a conversation about how your dd interpreted it and then also talk to your dd about her body issue. I would not ask her to be repremanded by the principal until I had the full story, had discussed the issue with her and failed to get a proper response (like an apology).

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Old 03-17-2012, 10:58 AM   #12
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I'm shocked to read that the Librarian would say something like that. That kind of stuff really sticks with kids, especially girls. I would definitely say something. She probably doesn't realize she is saying stuff like that and it is important to remind her to pay attention to what comes out of her mouth. Yikes.

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Old 03-17-2012, 11:12 AM   #13
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How horrible. I very much agree with what 3xBlessed said. Or, if you feel certain that she directly called her fat, you could email the librarian and cc the principal; it will likely be better received if she doesn't feel as though she was "tattled" on, but then the principal is still aware of the situation.

Ugh, I can't possibly see how she would ever think that was okay to say to a child!! Or anyone, for that matter...
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Old 03-17-2012, 11:28 AM   #14
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mibarra
I would definitely talk to the principal. However, we have to remember that sometimes children remember bits and pieces of things or take things out of context. I'm not trying to say your daughter is lying, or intentionally misleading you, but that may not be the full story, KWIM?

If the librarian really said that, she'd be getting a piece of my mind for sure!
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Originally Posted by 3Xblessed
I would speak to the librarian...is it possible that she didn't say "you are fat" but that is what your dd interpreted it as and therefore reported it to you as that? If the librarian said, "what a cute little belly you have" I would not be as upset. Is the librarian an older woman? Remember the older generation was not obsessed with body image like our generation and a "cute little belly" means just that to them.

I would have a conversation about how your dd interpreted it and then also talk to your dd about her body issue. I would not ask her to be repremanded by the principal until I had the full story, had discussed the issue with her and failed to get a proper response (like an apology).
I was thinking it could have been something like that. That's another reason I hesitate to say anything. I just have trouble imagining someone saying something like that to her, but I also know that she's not one to lie or make up stories. I'm hoping it was just a misunderstanding.
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Old 03-17-2012, 11:36 AM   #15
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Re: Should I say something?

See I would talk to the librarian first. Ask her what was said. If you get an attitude from her or she does admit she said that, then speak to the principal. But if the librarian somehow said something that was not exactly that or she is apologetic for letting that slip then I don't think it is necessary to take it to the principal.

It is possible that your daughter heard something that was not quite exactly what was said. Maybe she said something about going up a size with the t-shirts and your daughter took it as a negative thing. You don't know till you talk to her about it.
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Old 03-17-2012, 12:08 PM   #16
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Re: Should I say something?

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Originally Posted by jacquelinemarie82 View Post
See I would talk to the librarian first. Ask her what was said. If you get an attitude from her or she does admit she said that, then speak to the principal. But if the librarian somehow said something that was not exactly that or she is apologetic for letting that slip then I don't think it is necessary to take it to the principal.

It is possible that your daughter heard something that was not quite exactly what was said. Maybe she said something about going up a size with the t-shirts and your daughter took it as a negative thing. You don't know till you talk to her about it.
I agree with this.

It is a horrible thing to say to a little girl - any child, really. I don't like confrontation, either, but if you dig around a bit and get even the hint that your child heard those words from the librarian, definitely make a big stink about it. An adult should never, ever tease a child or make negative comments about a child's body.
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Old 03-17-2012, 02:40 PM   #17
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Re: Should I say something?

I would send an email to the principle. This is an issue that needs to be discussed school wide. It will be a teaching opportunity for the administration. The librarian obviously has a problem that isn't going to be fixed by a parent confronting her. I would let the principle shock her with the info. It is that big a deal.
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Old 03-18-2012, 02:46 PM   #18
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Re: Should I say something?

My dd misunderstands things ALL the time. Personally, I wouldn't say anything because I know dd likely misunderstood. (because she's not even close to fat). If it seemed possible that dd had understood correctly I would speak to the librarian. Not an email. Emails are also misunderstood. I know what you mean about hating confrontation. I'm there will you but if it's important enough I just suck it up and do it.

I would not go to the principal. As an employee, I would fine that rather rude for someone to go to my boss first.

But then again... I've noticed that the way people do things in the US is totally different than the way things are done here so take my comments as you want!
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