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Old 04-04-2012, 08:16 AM   #1
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What to Say When People Say Non-Circ Is Dirty?

I'm a mother of girls and, as a woman, I know almost nothing about penises.

We just found out yesterday we are having a boy. I just don't think I could circ in good conscience, but TWICE after I told some coworkers, two MEN asked if we were going to circumcise.

I know the "right" answer would have been to tell them to mind their own business or to "lie" and tell them we haven't decided yet, but I didn't. I said probably not.

And right away they were both like, "Ew, isn't that hard to keep clean?" I said I didn't think it was any harder and one moved onto the locker room question, but one wanted to argue the fact. And I had nothing.

I think if I get asked again I'll act shocked that someone dared ask such a personal question, but what would be a quick response to the "dirty" remarks. I can see myself being really bothered by that.

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Old 04-04-2012, 08:23 AM   #2
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Re: What to Say When People Say Non-Circ Is Dirty?

I would probably just tell them to mind their own buisness.

I can't believe they asked that kind of questions.

As someone who works with men and has had two boys-- I have never discussed our decission with any other than DH and no one has even asked. not even the women I work with asked me about circ'ing
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Old 04-04-2012, 08:24 AM   #3
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Well for me personally someone I know personally would dare not ask and to be honest I only had my dh's parents comment during the pregnancy. I would recommend looking at the thread on here about why not to circ it'll give you some good stats to have. But also really research it so when someone has a "fact" you can politely tell them your own. I usually followed with well this is a personal decision thanks you for your concern though.

As far as dirty goes I would just say well I plan to clean it properly (which is super super easy) and plan to teach him to clean it properly so we have no concern. Or tell them that it is a protectant barrier surrounding his pen!s and that it requires no extra care as an infant and give them a website or paper to check out.
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Old 04-04-2012, 08:31 AM   #4
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Re: What to Say When People Say Non-Circ Is Dirty?

Thank you both! I appreciate the insight.

As far as dirty goes I would just say well I plan to clean it properly (which is super super easy) and plan to teach him to clean it properly so we have no concern

I like this - I don't know why I didn't think of it on the fly. I guess I was a bundle of nerves yesterday because the ultrasound showed an abnormality so my mind was elsewhere when the subject came up.
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Old 04-04-2012, 08:34 AM   #5
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Re: What to Say When People Say Non-Circ Is Dirty?

I just say it isn't my penis so I don't feel comfortable cutting part of it off and when my son is old enough he can do whatever he wants. Then I tell them to research it so we can have an informed conversation
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Old 04-04-2012, 08:36 AM   #6
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Re: What to Say When People Say Non-Circ Is Dirty?

Just say that it isn't hard to keep clean. It involves just wiping it off like you would a finger until the foreskin retracts on its own years down the road and then they pull the foreskin back,clean and they are done. Takes less time than washing a foot.

One you mention foreskin, most men won't keep going on and on I've found
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Old 04-04-2012, 08:37 AM   #7
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IMO, it's no different than a vagina. As a baby, u do nothing. It's no different that any other part of the body. As the child grows and skin separate and created more folds, you teach to wash between those. With soapy water (although after that one thread on DS I have discovered there are women who don't really wash their vaginas.. So.. Are they dirty??)

I think it's odd that we forget that the young girls privates could get gross too, without care. It's only the circumcised penis that's rather 'simple'. I would just say 'yes, it requires about as much attention as a girls privates. That's not much time at all. No biggie'
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Old 04-04-2012, 08:38 AM   #8
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Re: What to Say When People Say Non-Circ Is Dirty?

Definitely take a look at the thread in the Pregnancy section of Whyl Not to Circ.

I just respond that circ being cleaner is an old wives tail and repeat my experience with circed DS1 who has to URINATE and DEFECATE on a fresh, raw, painful wound. How in the world is that cleaner!? That is setting them up for infection! Then explain how the foreskin actually is meant to protect against infection in the infant years. There is no special cleaning required, just wipe from base to tip. And once retractable, is extremely easy to clean as well. If they want to argue further, I explain that girls have MUCH more folds and are harder to keep clean, but we don't cut off their labia.

However, it usually comes down to this:
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Old 04-04-2012, 08:43 AM   #9
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Re: What to Say When People Say Non-Circ Is Dirty?

Oh, that picture is great. This coworker used to be friendly, but over time he's just gotten grumpy. He's an A** but we have to work together so I try to remain amicable. I'm embarassed that I even tried to engage him in debate.
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Old 04-04-2012, 09:15 AM   #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sparkygirl74
I just say it isn't my penis so I don't feel comfortable cutting part of it off and when my son is old enough he can do whatever he wants. Then I tell them to research it so we can have an informed conversation
This is my take too.
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