View Poll Results: were you told you could not have kids and why?
no, i havn't been told that 13 40.63%
yes, I have PCOS and was told that but i have kids 5 15.63%
yes, i have other reproductive issues and have kids 4 12.50%
yes, I have a messed up uterus but have children 2 6.25%
No, I am unable to carry my own child 0 0%
other 8 25.00%
Voters: 32. You may not vote on this poll

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Old 04-10-2012, 08:59 AM   #1
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were you told you couldn't have kids and have since carried a child to viability?

My SIL has never been pregnant. She is seeing a doctor, not sure if it's an RE or regular OB b/c i'm getting the info from my mom. (There is no rift between us or anything, she's just close with my mom).

She was told yesterday that, after testing to see if she has eggs, that she does in fact have eggs but has an under developed uterus and will never be able to have children. Surragacy is their only option. (pretty sure my mom was telling me this as a heads up I may be asked, as we are about to have our 4th and final child, but it is not something my husband is comfortable with)

Anywho, I know some here have an oddly shaped uterus, or uteri in at least one case....so maybe someone can give more insight? I told my mom that SIL should get a second opinion. MY mom did say that SIL has great insurance that will pay for a surrogate. (idk what their time line is, but they are in FL is you know of an agency or individual interested, please pm me so I may pass on the info)

ETA- they have been married for 4.5 years, never prevented, but she was not ovulating for quiet some time. Likely due to the fact that she is very thin. I think they've got that part taken care of now, since they do know she has eggs. I told my mom that she should mention I'm pretty familiar with a lot of the TTC methods for those with difficulties and some meds since i'm on here (didn't mention that i read charts and have books and such on the matter b/c it's fascinating lol! Dont' want her to freak out lol!)

ETA2- SIL is 29, brother is 34 and has fathered a child so we know he, at one time at least, was capable

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Old 04-10-2012, 09:03 AM   #2
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Re: were you told you couldn't have kids and have since carried a child to viability?

No advice, but that sounds like a tough situation, especially if she is thinking of asking you to carry a child for her.
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Old 04-10-2012, 09:04 AM   #3
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Re: were you told you couldn't have kids and have since carried a child to viability?

I have a tilted uterus. I was told A) that I wouldn't get pregnant without medical intervention (I have borderline PCOS and anovulatory cycles) and B) that I would struggle carrying a child to term. We don't get pg easily...ds1 took 4 years and ds2 took 2...and both times my cycles were so crazy! My dr didn't believe the numbers and timing of both my pg's.
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Old 04-10-2012, 09:07 AM   #4
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Re: were you told you couldn't have kids and have since carried a child to viability?

Well I voted other. My situation is a bit different and am not sure how applicable it is.

I never had any reason to expect any fertility issues. I got pregnant at 17, while using protection, and carried to full term with no complications.

When she was 17, I got married and DH and I began to try right away. We TTC for 6 yrs. We had lots of tests. In the end, we were able to get pregnant with an IVF. During the course of the IVF, we were told that DH had antisperm antibodies and that my eggs were prematurely aging and that we were not likely to ever conceive on our own together.

During DD2's first year we tried to save for another IVF, sure we weren't going to have any more kids without it. But then when she was 13 months old, we got pregnant on our own, not even trying, and in fact under quite a bit of stress from other things.

My youngest is now 19 months old, and amazingly, I am pregnant again, on our own, not trying but not preventing.


I do have to say, I haven't ever heard of "an underdeveloped uterus" so I wonder just what they mean by that.
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Old 04-10-2012, 09:15 AM   #5
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Re: were you told you couldn't have kids and have since carried a child to viability?

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Originally Posted by happysmileylady View Post
I do have to say, I haven't ever heard of "an underdeveloped uterus" so I wonder just what they mean by that.
that was my first question also. I know some have an oddly shaped uterus, heart shaped or at least one person on DS has two (each being smaller than normal)
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Old 04-10-2012, 09:22 AM   #6
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Re: were you told you couldn't have kids and have since carried a child to viability?

I was told that we wouldn't be able to carry a child to term without supplements and may need to take fertility drugs to get pregnant at all. We got pregnant a couple months later and have 2 healthy children now without any interventions/medications. Sometimes doctors are wrong BUT it sounds like they've already been trying for awhile so more reason to suspect a problem
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Old 04-10-2012, 09:24 AM   #7
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I know my SIL has a bifurcated uterus. Hers is almost 2, but the bottoms are conjoined. Her only problem is that they want to make sure she can carry the baby long enough to be healthy, so she's being monitored quite closely.

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Old 04-10-2012, 09:27 AM   #8
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Re: were you told you couldn't have kids and have since carried a child to viability?

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it sounds like they've already been trying for awhile so more reason to suspect a problem
they havn't really been so much as trying, as not trying not to....if you know what i mean. It's one thing to just not prevent when you have crazy cycles and not be trying one way or another...but another ball game if you've been charting, meds to cycle, etc...if that makes sense.

Dont' get me wrong, there may in fact, be a real issue. I'm just not sure if it's something that can be overcome or if surragacy truly is their only option.
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Old 04-10-2012, 10:01 AM   #9
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Re: were you told you couldn't have kids and have since carried a child to viability?

I'd suggest a second opinion too. Or at least get the info directly from her. There may be something getting lost in translation since your mom is the middle man. You know how that can be.

My situation doesn't really help you. But, my husband can't get me pregnant without IVF. As you know, we have 5 kids through it and I'm pregnant with the 6th.
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Old 04-10-2012, 03:14 PM   #10
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My mom and dad were married 13 years before I was able to be conceived (I'm their first). They are Christians and had their pastor pray over them specifically that they be able to bear a child. Of course, that isn't really a "method" per say, and I don't know if your brother and SIL are religious or not, but that was their experience. My mom also used NFP, but backwards if you kwim, to try to GET pregnant instead of avoiding pregnancy. The other factor that she feels made a big difference for her was stress. She was under lots of stress from jobs and ministry for many years, but took a year totally off, and at the end was able to conceive. Again, not sure if that will help them in any way, but that's my parents' experience.

If she's very thin, could it be that she doesn't have enough good fat to metabolize the necessary hormones? I have a friend that had that problem, but was able to reverse it and now has two healthy kids. She has a blog, www.mommypotamus.com
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