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Old 05-01-2007, 11:38 AM   #1
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How long do you wait to tell?

First off, I am NOT pregnant, nor do I plan on getting pregnant any time real soon, but I was just curious. How long do you all wait to tell when you are pregnant, and why?

With our first two, we told pretty much the entire universe immediately. I was only 4 wks with DS and 3 1/2 wks with DD when we found out, so everyone knew from the very very beginning that we were expecting.

Whenever we do get preggers again, I thought it would be fun to wait a while. I'm not terribly concerned about m/c, though it is always a possibility, but more just for the fact that my DH and I could have a secret together that only we knew. Then I thought we could either wait until people start figuring it out on their own, or tell them at 12 wks or whatever. (I show really early, so it probably wouldn't take long for people to take notice, though they may not ask).


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Old 05-01-2007, 11:39 AM   #2
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Re: How long do you wait to tell?

I always told everyone immediately. I had really bad morning sickness and fatigue, so no way I would have been able to hide it.
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Old 05-01-2007, 11:44 AM   #3
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Re: How long do you wait to tell?

well i had a hard time ttc, so it took me less than an hour to tell my family and dh!! oh it took uhmm 5 minutes to tell an online community that i use to hang out for 3 years too.
and a funny thing: I had to dip the HPT on the toilet water cuz I was soo scared to pee in the stick, i aimed wrong and the stupid HPT was invalid yep too funny!! it worked!!! i got 2 lines
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Old 05-01-2007, 12:49 PM   #4
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Re: How long do you wait to tell?

With our first 2 kids we told as soon as the stick turned! We had 3 m/c in a row ttc #3, we told at 4wks with the first, didnt get a chance to say anything with the 2nd & told at 9wks with the 3rd. With Sofia we told my mom right away but didnt tell anyone else for 9wks. THIS time, we told my mom at 6wks (we were going to wait till 12wks, but my sister had just had a stillborn that day & I told my mom), we JUST told my in laws on April 1st (I was 16wks) & we ONLY told them then because we were going up there the following week for an unplanned trip & they would have figured it out for themselves We also only told our kids on that day too.
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Old 05-01-2007, 12:58 PM   #5
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Re: How long do you wait to tell?

With our first, we told my MIL *we were living w/her* the same night, and told my family a few days later after Dr/bloodtest confirmed.

With 2nd, I m/c before getting to tell DH *we weren't trying and I was a bit afraid to tell him for fear he would freak! And we told our moms about the M/C about 3 weeks later...I was an emotional mess...

This time we waited until the first U/S and then a couple more days..and then let DS "tell" them by wearing his "I'm going to be a big brother" shirt...took both my mom and MIL about 15 min to notice it and the were holding him! LOL I guess I was about 7.5 weeks...
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Old 05-01-2007, 01:02 PM   #6
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Re: How long do you wait to tell?

We waited until 14wks after hearing the hb. Slightly due to mc fear, but also bc we felt like it was for us to know, and others would find out eventually.
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Old 05-01-2007, 01:17 PM   #7
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Re: How long do you wait to tell?

I tell as soon as I have the blood test done with ds it was about 4-6 weeks and with this one it was probably about the same
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Old 05-01-2007, 01:20 PM   #8
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Re: How long do you wait to tell?

The first time around, we'd been trying for 4 years, so we told immediate family right away, the rest of our friends we told after 8 weeks or so, and by then we knew it was twins.

Second time around, we told immediate family around 6-8 weeks, then everyone else at 12 weeks.

My rule is that I didn't tell anyone that I didn't want to have to tell that I miscarried. I never miscarried with any of my pregnancies, but you never know, and I didn't want to be in the position of explaining that to people I didn't know well.
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Old 05-01-2007, 01:26 PM   #9
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Re: How long do you wait to tell?

Family and friends found out when I was 7 months with dd #1, we let the bump tell it all. We mc right before, but that wasn't why... we just felt like it would be better to see a baby belly before saying anything. Before we had dd#2, I mc at 12 wks a few months before and with that one we couldn't wait to tell about it... literally the day after we got blood work back... everyone and their cousin knew we were expecting and it was hard to tell everyone we were no longer... when we found out about dd#2, I refused to go to a Dr until I was 12 weeks, so we got confirmed then. We let the ultrasound and heartbeat in an attachment via email tell the story to our family and closest friends at 12 weeks and sent emails every week of new heartbeats and belly shots to keep our family involved.

I think if I am blessed with another pregnancy, I'll wait until delivery just for kicks. Both of our families are so far away anyway, no one would see a belly bump!

Last edited by hackermd; 05-01-2007 at 01:30 PM.
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Old 05-01-2007, 01:41 PM   #10
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Re: How long do you wait to tell?

With Mason (ds#1) we didn't tell anyone until I was out of my first trimester.

With Camden (ds#2) we told everyone at around 8ish weeks---right after my first u/s. We would have waited, but I was SO sick, and we were leaving on a huge family trip (with all of DH's family), and they were bound to find out anyway!

If/when we have another, we will probably wait until AT LEAST 8 weeks, if not 13 or 14.
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