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Old 04-24-2012, 07:15 PM   #31
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Re: How to be a good parent

You must NEVER admit that you do not do any of the above things perfectly, let alone don't do some of them at all. This will make other people feel like imperfection and dysfunction are normal, causing them to go easy on themselves. That would be a very bad thing. It is imperative, at all times, to maintain the standard of absolute superiority.

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Old 04-24-2012, 07:24 PM   #32
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Re: How to be a good parent

Also!

- You must never allow your child to use a pacifier. It's a sign of weakness if the parent isn't able to soothe their child without a binky.
- The minute an infant is introduced to the binky they will refuse the breast and never accept it again.
- Any child over the age of one using a binky will ruin their teeth and they will have to eat from a straw for the rest of their life. They also won't learn to talk until they're 8.
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Old 04-24-2012, 07:33 PM   #33
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Re: How to be a good parent

Quote:
Originally Posted by chandni3 View Post
-Your child must wear only organic cotton clothing or they will get cancer AND DIE.

-All your child's toys must be made of organic wood, or other natural materials with food grade, non-toxic paint. If your child sucks on anything plastic, they will get cancer AND DIE.

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Old 04-24-2012, 07:38 PM   #34
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I'm glad you posted this because I'm KILLING myself trying to be a good mom! I'm trying to do all the above and I'm exhsused, overwhelmed and broke and yet I feel like an inadequate mother. Every time I think I'm doing it right I discover I could be doing it better so I try that! I discovered cloth diapering about 6 months ago...but then discovered really good moms use wool, so i tried that but failed, then I discovered even better moms do elimination communication....I'm not home enough to do that so i feel inadequate. I only breast fed for 15 months...I feel inadequate. I'm not able to afford to feed my family completely organic, I feel inadequate. It never ends! How can i compete? How can i feel like I'm a good mom? Things weren't like this w my first child, the internet wasn't invented when i had him. My ignorance was my bliss! Ah to go back to those days where it was ok to give your baby a bottle if you had to.
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Old 04-24-2012, 07:40 PM   #35
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Don't dare put your baby in a stroller!
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Old 04-24-2012, 07:47 PM   #36
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Omg, thank you for making me laugh out loud while trying to nurse the baby to sleep! (Which, coincidentally, I should never do, because the baby will become dependent on the breast as a sleep aid and will never learn to fall asleep without it and I will have to accompany her to college someday so I can continue to nurse her to sleep.)
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Old 04-24-2012, 08:19 PM   #37
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Never use contraception. If you use contraception you are a baby killer and a control freak.

If you accidentally get pregnant, see OP re: irresponsible leech on society.

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Old 04-24-2012, 08:29 PM   #38
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Originally Posted by jacquelinemarie82
Has anyone said anything about rice cereal? I hear constant debate over that and when to feed.
OMG. Nothing, and I mean NOTHING but breastmilk should pass your child's lips before six months at the earliest, and preferably eight months. And rice cereal is a horrible idea of a first food. If you give it to them or give them so much as a few ounces of water before six months, you have sentenced them to food allergies, obesity, and an early grave.
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Old 04-24-2012, 08:33 PM   #39
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Re: How to be a good parent

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Old 04-24-2012, 08:37 PM   #40
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Re: How to be a good parent

lol! thanks for the laugh!
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