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Old 05-03-2012, 06:59 PM   #1
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What if you can't afford alimony?

Really long story short, my fiancee just got an order to pay his ex $1000 a month in alimony, and we can't afford it. There will be another court date in the next year, this is an interim order.

What can he do? We are going to try to consult a trust attorney because at issue is that she gets $6000 a month from a trust fund (and can always ask for more), but the court decided for now to act like she has no income.

She is able to work but has long refused to... One bit of a long string of emotional abuse on her part. She has narcissistic personality disorder, which also means she's very charming and believable in her lies and allegations against my fiancee. She lied on the stand about her monthly expenses, and she has falsified documents about her income.

Anyway. Even if we cut everything non essential... We pay only the minimums on debt (that she incurred on his cards), rent (on a 2 bedroom place that houses 4 people, toddler in our room), utilities (no cable), food (the minimum that works with food allergies and special needs in the family)... Absolutely no going out, no entertainment, no new clothes, no going to the doctor, no emergencies, biking to work... We are still short $1000.

I'm going to go back to work, despite an agreement with my LO's dad that I'd be at home till he's older... But between childcare, and the reduction in the child support I receive, that only nets a few hundred.

Wtf is a family supposed to do?

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Old 05-04-2012, 09:23 AM   #2
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Re: What if you can't afford alimony?

Tuff luck. Sorry don't meant to be harsh. You could go back to court and try to fight it, but you are going to spend more in attorney fees and probably get no relief. The courts don't care. My husband pays life long via his military retirement and it sucks given how long they were married, what happened in the marriage, etc. That is one reason we put off having kids a little bit as between that and the child support, it was crazy.
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Old 05-04-2012, 11:40 AM   #3
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Harsh is fine, that is as we suspected. We really have more hope of relief than some, given that there is already a future court date, and we can consult a trust attorney. The divorce isn't final yet (no I'm not the other woman or the reason he left) so this is interim and may change.

Ah well. He and his freedom are worth it. It's just money.
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Old 05-04-2012, 08:25 PM   #4
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Re: What if you can't afford alimony?

Then, it may be a temporary alimony situation with a temporary order and that may be a bit different. Many family attorney's will give free consultations, so its probably in his interest to contact a few and pay one as long term, it may be better to pay an attorney and save on alimony. It probably has to do with length of marriage, conditions in the marriage and if they had kids. Hopefully, with the final order it will be time limited if he can't get rid of it. It really does suck. I get alimony in cases but on long term marriages and ones for other issues.
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Old 05-04-2012, 08:54 PM   #5
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Re: What if you can't afford alimony?

I'd get an lawyer asap. They can file a motion to fight it and give you some real advice.
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Old 05-04-2012, 09:07 PM   #6
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Re: What if you can't afford alimony?

no advice, id talk to a lawyer. fwiw exbil hasnt paid alimony or court ordered CS ever in the correct amount(payed a portion on CS that was garnished for a few months but thats it). nothing has happened to him, even after 3 months of sending nada so idk what happens if he doesnt/cant pay. i know he is ordered to(until something else is worked out) but if you dont have it, idk. also since he is your fiancee(are your kids his?) your joint bills may not even be factored in
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Old 05-04-2012, 09:13 PM   #7
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Re: What if you can't afford alimony?

Child support? Alimony? Whats that? Oh I guess that would mean a MAN would have to have a job... off my rant for now

Id def consult an attorney and ensure the numbers are correct.
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