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Old 05-17-2012, 02:21 PM   #1
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S/o what are your 'dealbreakers'

Ya know, those "You can be friends with Alice, but you are NOT going to her house. Ever."

Mine would be if the parents smoke indoors or in their vehicles, ever, and if the parents drink frequently (meaning more than once or twice a year) in the home. Drug use isn't something I want my kids exposed to and I wouldn't feel safe knowing my child was in the care of someone who was even the slightest bit inebriated. What if there were an emergency? Would someone who had drank (even 1 beer is 1 beer too many to be driving IMO) be driving my child to the ER?

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Old 05-17-2012, 02:24 PM   #2
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Re: S/o what are your 'dealbreakers'

Racist parents. Parents who teach that "gay people go to hell" (actually had this experience). Drug addicts.
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Old 05-17-2012, 02:29 PM   #3
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Wow, I don't have an answer but I can say that my husband has a finger of Scotch (he collects single malts as a hobby) once a week and I don't see a problem there. Not that anyone would know that unless we had to fill out a survey.
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Old 05-17-2012, 02:54 PM   #4
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Re: S/o what are your 'dealbreakers'

Mostly, I wouldn't want people drinking around my kids...I want them to be able to react properly in an emergency.
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Old 05-17-2012, 02:54 PM   #5
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Re: S/o what are your 'dealbreakers'

Yeah I am a non-drinker but if I restricted my sons friends to only those whose parents didn't drink but once or twice a year I'd just have to tell he he could have no friends. Heck my parents usually have wine with dinner, I don't see the problem.
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Old 05-17-2012, 03:08 PM   #6
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Originally Posted by elkay724
Racist parents. Parents who teach that "gay people go to hell" (actually had this experience). Drug addicts.
Ditto.
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Old 05-17-2012, 04:37 PM   #7
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Re: S/o what are your 'dealbreakers'

A few beers doesnt bother me (as long as ONE adult is sober). If they were falling down drunks, I'd have to say no. Any drug use is also a no for me. Or if I just have a "creepy" feeling about anyone in the home. (you know that vibe you get from some people that makes you want to run in the other direction). Also, My kids wont be going inside or the back yard of someone whos parents I dont know. By this I mean I want to meet BOTH of the parents and any other adults in the house. I've heard way too many "uncle" stories in my life. (Probably over reacting, but I honestly dont care if they think im a nut for asking to meet ALL adult/ older teens in the family)
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Old 05-17-2012, 04:57 PM   #8
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Re: S/o what are your 'dealbreakers'

Indoor smokers for sure. dh just made friends with these people that do a game night and their kids are the same ages as mine. my first question was "do they smoke inside" he said yes and i was all "that's a bummer the kids and i can never go there" I have absolutely NO respect for someone that smokes around their kids. how freaking selfish can you get

no bigots either. if you hate poor people, gays, and generally closed minded you arent fit to be my friend.

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A few beers doesnt bother me (as long as ONE adult is sober). If they were falling down drunks, I'd have to say no. Any drug use is also a no for me. Or if I just have a "creepy" feeling about anyone in the home.
same here. i dont care if someone smokes pot, just not around my kids.
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Old 05-17-2012, 05:15 PM   #9
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Racism/bigotry, drug use, not having at least 1 100% sober person in the house, no more than I demand of myself and DH...
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Old 05-17-2012, 05:34 PM   #10
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Re: S/o what are your 'dealbreakers'

I don't think once or twice a year can be called "frequent drinkers", that seems more like occasional drinkers to me. DH drinks a few beers a month, and I drink a glass of wine a few times a month. DH also collects whisky from Germany. We're Italian, so this is part of our culture/heritage. We're not drunks, we don't even get buzzed. We only enjoy our beverage once the kids are in bed, not when other kids are over or anything.

Anyways, to answer the questions. No smoking indoors, no drunks or drugs, no sex offenders, no guns out in children's reach, safe enviroment, not racist/sexist/abusive, that's probably it. As long as it's a safe and healthy enviroment all is good.

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