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Old 07-06-2012, 05:45 PM   #101
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Re: Anyone else leave their childbearing up to God?

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I'm so grateful for this thread and all of your Godly advice. I've had several days to contemplate what I've learned here and I've come to realize that God has definitely given me my son, as high needs as his needs are, for a VERY good reason and at just the right time in my life! Prior to his conception, I was on a New Age/"progressive" Christianity/"anything goes" kind of path and for some reason, I found Christ through my son. First, it was the grief from the miscarriage I had the cycle before we conceived him! Throughout the pregnancy, I was in a very contemplative place in my life. I was scared to become a mother again after not having a baby in the house for 3-4 years. I was scared about the state of my marriage and wondering if we would survive another baby. In my anxiety, I started to pull away from the New Age classes and friends whom I had that in common with. I was also so sick with the worst MS in my life that I didn't do much of anything during his pregnancy! Then, here comes my son who has forced me to be STILL. Literally still for hours every day while I nurse him through his naps and nights. Depression set in. I took to liking my IPAD in those quiet moments and from there, I began researching New Age, occultism, Satan (I never believed in satan/demons until recently). I also began reading the Bible online as well as the history of ancient cultures and how they blend in with the Bible. That's how I came to Christ. Everything started to line up and make sense, logically! It all makes sense now! God knows I needed my son to do all this because I never would have been still long enough to hear him. I was always so busy and so social and constantly on the go! Thank you guys for encouraging me to trust God in this process!
That's awesome!

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Old 07-07-2012, 08:22 AM   #102
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Re: Anyone else leave their childbearing up to God?

I keep coming back to this thread. It's encouraging to hear other moms who are going through something similar. I am still praying for my husband to be open to a 5th child. And recently started praying for other things that are related. It's amazing where prayer and seeking God can take you
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Old 07-07-2012, 09:44 PM   #103
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Re: Anyone else leave their childbearing up to God?

Steph, I keep cOming back here too! We are in very similar situations with all boys, almost the sane ages
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Old 07-08-2012, 07:45 PM   #104
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Re: Anyone else leave their childbearing up to God?

My husband and I are trying now for number 4...while I see it ok, to let God handle it with no contraceptives he seems somewhat hesitant..and has put a "time limit" on no contraceptive for about 2 weeks...and if God wants us to have another one he will do it than... :/ i'm hoping I will get pregnant..nd if I don't i'll understand that it's God's will not mine not to have another one...
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Old 07-09-2012, 12:33 AM   #105
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Re: Anyone else leave their childbearing up to God?

We also leave it up to God. I'm Ariana, Dh is Armando. We have 4 kids right now. Our youngest is 4.5m and still nursing with no PPAF yet, so I'm not expecting another blessing right now.
We live a pretty frugal life, but coming from a very hard childhood, I learned that the best thing you can spend on a child is TIME!!!
DH is pretty deep in his religion. He's from Mexico in a town thats very deep in the religious culture.
I'm one of 9 kids and DH is one of 15 kids, so we are used to large families! I love it.
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Old 07-09-2012, 12:33 PM   #106
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Re: Anyone else leave their childbearing up to God?

trying-Welcome! I LOVE your signature. Couldn't agree more!
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Old 07-09-2012, 12:49 PM   #107
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Re: Anyone else leave their childbearing up to God?

Hi Ariana! Welcome!
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Old 07-09-2012, 01:28 PM   #108
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Re: Anyone else leave their childbearing up to God?

We have been married for almost 10 years and have not tried to prevent any little ones. We've been blessed with 4 boys and are due with a new one in February. Current ages are 7, 6, 3 and 9mo. We did lose a baby in 2010, and a twin with our last pregnancy, so this would have been baby #7.
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Old 07-09-2012, 04:55 PM   #109
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Re: Anyone else leave their childbearing up to God?

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Hi ladies. I wanted to recommend a couple of books that I think might help with some of the issues that we've been discussing on this thread.

First, for those mamas who want to be open to life but have reluctant spouses (and for those who have fears about being given too much / too many), I would recommend Covenanted Happiness by Cormac Burke. He talks about how parents used to see children as "wealth" (and many African cultures still do so) but we have come to view them as "burdens" or "mouths to feed." Burke invites us to return to the older way of looking at our children. The entire book is available online, here: http://www.cormacburke.or.ke/node/995 One caveat, it is written from a Roman Catholic perspective, but I think there are many things in it that all Christians seeking to let God "plan" their families can agree with.

The second book is for mamas who have high-need children. Art and Larraine Bennet have written three books on temperament, The Temperament God Gave You, The Temperament God Gave Your Spouse, The Temperament God Gave Your Kids. All three are very good. I think an understanding of your own, your spouse's, and your children's temperaments can help when dealing with a particularly difficult child. That needy, overly active, or intense child might just be acting that way because of their God-given temperament. And when you can put your finger on why your child reacts in a certain way, you can help prevent negative reactions or channel them into more positive outcomes. My DD2 is a three-year-old choleric (i.e. bulldozer) and I have to keep reminding myself not get involved in secondary power struggles with her because I'm a rule-following melancholic.

Perhaps these books might help some of you as they've helped me. God bless.
I have not read the first book, but I totally second the recommendation of the "temperament" books. Awesome and so very helpful!
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Old 07-12-2012, 11:50 AM   #110
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Re: Anyone else leave their childbearing up to God?

HI ladies! My name is Clare, and we currently have 3 happy, healthy, wonderful children. We have large spacing between them tough, as in the early years of our marriage, we were athiest. :-/ My oldest will be 13 in October, my next is 6, and youngest is 16 months. My husband also deploys every other year too, so that's one thing. lol I've been a born again Torah Observant Christian for 4 years now, and once my husband comes home from this deployment, we are praying God blesses us again, and with how ever many he sees fit to give us. I also miscarry easily. I should have had 8 children, had the Lord not needed them back in heaven. Praying He blesses us again.
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