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Old 06-17-2012, 06:52 AM   #11
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Old 06-17-2012, 06:57 AM   #12
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Re: Small infertility vent

I'm so sorry!

I, too, have been there. Infertility is one of the hardest things I have ever been through and my heart aches for anyone going through it. (and sadly, it looks like we are going down the same road again - TTC #2 for going on 1.5 years, with a couple of miscarriages thrown in there)

Anyway, we tried for 17 cycles for my beautiful DD. Truly, I know now why it took so long. She is EXACTLY the child we were meant to have. She is perfect for us in every way, and I just can't begin to imagine having gotten pregnant any sooner, or things working out any other way than what they did. God knew what He was doing.

I know those stupid BFNs hurt. But keep the faith - you will get your miracle!!
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Old 06-17-2012, 08:26 AM   #13
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Hugs! We are in the same position and these holidays hurt. Even going to church on mothers & fathers day is a reminder of what we don't have. I hope you are feeling better physically and can find something to do today that is not too emotional taxing!
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Old 06-17-2012, 09:54 PM   #14
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Re: Small infertility vent

Thanks everyone. I really appreciate the support. I decided to stay off the internet today to avoid all the Father's Day stuff. I follow a lot of "mommy blogs" and it was tough to get so many emails today, but I know tomorrow will be worse. Mother's Day was awful, but the following Monday was a nightmare with all those blog posts coming to my email.

I know eventually things will work out like they are supposed to, I'm just having a very hard time not being jealous and really really sad. I love the support women get on this site, thank you ladies for being awesome. I have no friends IRL to talk to - my BFF is on her mission and we can only exchange letters and we just moved to the Twin Cities a few months ago and I have not made a single friend here, so it's just really really hard.

ETA: My mom is a great listener, but got pregnant her first time trying with each of her kids and just keeps telling me that it will happen when I relax. I told her it's more than that, but I am going crazy!
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Old 06-17-2012, 10:01 PM   #15
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Re: Small infertility vent

Been there and it cuts like a knife to watch others celebrate those days while you long and cry and experience heartache month after month.

If you have time, search my Infertility journey on here, it should give you hope that it does happen.....sometimes it just takes over 6 years
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Old 06-17-2012, 10:20 PM   #16
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Re: Small infertility vent

Thank you so much, Melissa. Your birth story was beautiful! I have a hard time talking about this because I know a lot of people have a much harder time than us. It hasn't been quite a year since we started trying, but I've been baby crazy for almost 4 years. I have problems with guilt over this because some people have it so much worse. It's especially hard because I only just turned 22 and people don't understand why I'd be trying to have a baby at this age and just tell me not to worry about it, that I have plenty of time. Deep down I know that is true and just makes me feel selfish.
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Old 06-17-2012, 10:33 PM   #17
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Re: Small infertility vent

Don't worry about what other people think. I got married at 19 and at 20 started trying. When it didn't work for many many years, I was constantly confronted with being "too young" to worry about TTC. Don't worry about what other people think, or that you haven't had it "hard enough". What matters is that it's tough for you, and it's ok to be sad, but as someone whose been there a long time, try not to let it consume your life. If you ever need to chat feel free to pm me. I hope tomorrow is not to rough on you, good luck on your journey.
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Old 06-18-2012, 05:02 AM   #18
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Re: Small infertility vent

Thank you, mama.
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Old 06-18-2012, 05:39 PM   #19
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Re: Small infertility vent

Im so sorry. I have been there. Asher took 15 months after a loss. At only 22 its norma that it could take longer than 1 year. Since him we got pregnant at 8 months pp, only 3 months trying.i hope that gives you some hope. Im 24.
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Old 06-18-2012, 09:02 PM   #20
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Re: Small infertility vent

Thank you Megan.

Today has been bad, but not unbearable and I am hoping the Father's Day junk will be gone by tomorrow. I appreciate all the and thank you for sharing your stories with me.
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