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Old 06-19-2012, 04:45 PM   #1
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Protocol with younger siblings and parties

My 5 yr old got invited to a party for a kid at school. Now that my LO is almost 2 he is very active and my 5 yr old wants him to go with (they are inseparable).

What is the protocol on that? Do I ask the mom if the LO can come or is it ok if I just bring him? It is at a jumpy place so I am sure she got a package.

Thoughts?

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Old 06-19-2012, 04:47 PM   #2
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Re: Protocol with younger siblings and parties

Depends - she's paying per person. If your DS2 shows up and is there, she'll have to pay for him. Not appropriated. If it's an open place and you can bring your DS2 there separate from the party (and pay for him obviously), go ahead. Really, either way, a 2 year old does not belong at a 5-year-old's birthday party in a situation like this.
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Old 06-19-2012, 04:50 PM   #3
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Re: Protocol with younger siblings and parties

I normally leave the "other" sibling(s) at home with Daddy. A couple of times when RSVPing the hosting parent volunteered/assumed that the other sibling would be coming as well.

When I hosted, I had a couple of parents ask if the other sibling could attend and volunteered to pay for them. I simply invited the other sibling on the spot and told them they weren't allowed to pay. I was in a position where I could do so though.

ETA: IME there is usually a flat rate for the first X amount of kids and then after they start adding at a per kid rate. My bounce house parties were never so well attended that we met that X amount even with a few extra siblings.
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Old 06-19-2012, 04:56 PM   #4
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Re: Protocol with younger siblings and parties

I would ask first, and offer to pay if there wasn't another option. In a way that leaves it ok for the other parent to say no. "is this a party just for the big kids or are siblings invited as well?" I would preferably leave the younger as I think it's good for all kids to get some age appropriate play time without their siblings around.
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Old 06-19-2012, 04:58 PM   #5
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I would leave the younger at home. Tell them that this is a special day for his friend and that he will get plenty of opportunities other times.

If there is an open area then I'd ask the parent if it's okay if you and the little came.

But if shed have to pay for him then nope.

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Old 06-19-2012, 05:00 PM   #6
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Re: Protocol with younger siblings and parties

Unless specifically invited, leave the younger sibling at home. I wouldn't even consider asking or bringing DS2 to a party for a classmate of DS1.
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Old 06-19-2012, 05:42 PM   #7
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Re: Protocol with younger siblings and parties

I have two boys ages 3 and 4.5. If my 4.5 year old is invited to a school party I never take DS2. I only take both when its a friend.

For example, the mother of a little girl in my older sons class sent me a facebook invite to her twins party (my son was in the class with one of the twins). He didn't know the other twin and the girls didn't know my younger son. I considered leaving the other son at home but decided since the invite was sent to me (I only casually know mom) that she was inviting me and the boys. So I took both and obviously got both girls gifts even thought he was friends with only one.

When an invite for a child in his class comes home in his backpack I take him and leave brother at home.
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Old 06-19-2012, 05:48 PM   #8
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Re: Protocol with younger siblings and parties

I would never bring the sibling to a party for a classmate. Exception being an indoor playground where there would be a ton of other kids anyways. I wouldn't even ask honestly.
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Old 06-19-2012, 05:55 PM   #9
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Re: Protocol with younger siblings and parties

I was actually curious about this myself. My oldest has only been to one classmates party (a month ago) everyone else has been family friends, so it was a given the little would be attending too. We did ended up taking my youngest, but only because it was at a park and my husband was going too, so he could just take her to play on the equipment while I stayed with my oldest. I don't know how it will go in the future.

Our biggest issue which isn't obviously the other parent of the birthday child's issue. Is my husband works such long hours that A. if he's working (which we don't always know until the night before) I do not have a sitter in the area (so it's bring sibling or "punish" my oldest and tell her she can't go. or B. because of my husband's hours family time is very important to us, and don't like taking from time spent with him.
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Old 06-19-2012, 07:39 PM   #10
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I would check in with the other momma, offer to pay for him if it was per person, and make sure I kept an eye on him.

But first I would explain to big brother that it's ok to go alone, he'll have fun with his friends, etc. I would only bring LO as an absolute last resort or if the other momma is a 'more the merrier' kind of person
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