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Old 06-22-2012, 08:38 PM   #1
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Just need to complain...DS won't let me wash dishes. Any advice welcome!

Yeah, yeah, yeah...Why am I on here when I could be doing them now, right? My feet are KILLING me from a long busy day and I finally have 2 mins alone. haha.

Anyone have any advice for what I can do to occupy DS or have him help? He'll be a year old in like 2 weeks. Since he was around 7ish months old, he'd freak out as soon as I start washing the dishes. We don't have a dishwasher so I do them all by hand. As soon as I start cooking dinner or even turn the sink on to draw dish water or even wash my hands he crawls over and climbs my leg, all the while screaming and crying frantically.
I'm not sure if he thinks the sink is going to eat me or what!! I end up letting dishes sit in the sink for up to 2 or 3 days. One week we were busy all week and they just piled up ALL week. This, IMO, is disgusting. I've never let dishes sit before and I hate seeing them sitting there. He will let me do any other household chore BUT the dishes. I'm starting to get annoyed. If I try to do them while he's napping he almost always wakes up. I've given him toys to play with. I've put him in the highchair for a snack which works once in a great while if I only have a quick sinkful to do. I've carried him in a sling and mei tei. Nothing I've tried works. Once I let him stand on a chair next to me and he LOVED it. But that's such a mess and I'm so scared he's going to throw dirty dishes on the floor or glass or grab knives (I keep them on the back of the sink so this isn't likely but could happen!) Any ideas? What do you all do? I'm at a loss and I'm so sick of stinky dishes and drawing 3 sinkfuls of water to get them all washed in clean water and listening to him cry.

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Old 06-22-2012, 09:02 PM   #2
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You can't do them while he naps... What about at night?
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Old 06-22-2012, 09:04 PM   #3
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Re: Just need to complain...DS won't let me wash dishes. Any advice welcome!

I sometimes wore my girls in a mei tai on my back while I washed dishes when they were at that age. I they usually calmed down right away once they were on my back and often fell asleep.

A backpack style carrier like an Ergo might be a solution.
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Old 06-22-2012, 09:18 PM   #4
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Re: Just need to complain...DS won't let me wash dishes. Any advice welcome!

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You can't do them while he naps... What about at night?
I do end up doing them at night a lot of the time. The problem with that is, DH works 12-18 hours a day so if I want to see/talk to him before he conks out on the couch or in bed from being exhausted I have to do it quick then. By the time we get a few min to catch up I'm exhausted and fall asleep to. He usually wants me in bed with him. He says he sleeps better when I'm there. We get up at 5:30 each morning so we are really tired by 10 or 11 usually and my energy level is 0.

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I sometimes wore my girls in a mei tai on my back while I washed dishes when they were at that age. I they usually calmed down right away once they were on my back and often fell asleep.

A backpack style carrier like an Ergo might be a solution.
DS isn't much on being held anymore. I've had him in the mei tai on my back while doing them and he hates it. Even when DH plays with him to keep him occupied (when he gets off a little earlier) we end up peeling DS off my legs. I have no idea why my washing dishes freaks the kid out so much. I've never heard of such a thing!
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Old 06-22-2012, 09:20 PM   #5
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Re: Just need to complain...DS won't let me wash dishes. Any advice welcome!

Back carry was what I was going to suggest... or throwing down a towel and filling a small tub of water with a couple of plastic dishes in it so he can "help"? Or just power through and let him scream and after a couple times he'll probably figure it out. Doing a sinkful of dishes only takes a couple of minutes if you do it after every meal - plus you're doing it more often and he's getting used to it.
Unless he has a sensory issue and the water is setting off alarms for him, I'd just do the dishes either with him on my back, or with him grabbing at my legs.
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Old 06-22-2012, 09:29 PM   #6
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Re: Just need to complain...DS won't let me wash dishes. Any advice welcome!

A towel and a little tub is a great idea!! I never thought about that! I have a really small one and some little "DS dishes" he loves to play with. I have the perfect blanket I could use for that. It's huge and absorbant. Thanks. I've listened to him scream it out so many times that it drives me nuts. I try keeping them done after each meal but the screaming and crying gets to me after a day or so, so I give up. He does it when I cook or bake or anything involving the sink or counter next to it. When I cook or bake he's ok being on a chair watching or in his highchair though. I think he just wants to be involved more than anything. He needs constant stimulation and loves helping me with laundry, sweeping(has his own little broom), washing floors, running the vacuum and everything.
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Old 06-23-2012, 05:38 AM   #7
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Re: Just need to complain...DS won't let me wash dishes. Any advice welcome!

Let him sit on the counter beside you and splash in the water....I mean *help* you. My kids love it. Although that would depend on how trustworthy he about sitting and not falling off the counter at that age. Some kids can, some kids can't. But almost all kiddos that age love to help.
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Old 06-23-2012, 05:41 AM   #8
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I was gonna say bring in the high chair and let him "help".

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Old 06-23-2012, 06:18 AM   #9
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Re: Just need to complain...DS won't let me wash dishes. Any advice welcome!

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Originally Posted by jen_batten View Post
Let him sit on the counter beside you and splash in the water....I mean *help* you. My kids love it. Although that would depend on how trustworthy he about sitting and not falling off the counter at that age. Some kids can, some kids can't. But almost all kiddos that age love to help.
I let him sit on the counter when I'm baking and help. He loves it but when I'm washing dishes he tries to crawl in the water too. Or he picks them out and tries to toss them on the floor and the floor gets soaked. I might try to pull a chair over and let him stand at the sink again or try the little tub of water with a towel and see if that helps. When I was having a yardsale the other week, I had a little bucket of water and some toys he played in and LOVED that.

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I was gonna say bring in the high chair and let him "help".

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I have but he gets mad b/c he can't reach well (our counters are a tight space...very very small house) and he wants to be able to be free to go when he wants to.
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Old 06-23-2012, 08:57 AM   #10
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Re: Just need to complain...DS won't let me wash dishes. Any advice welcome!

No suggestions, but I can sympathize! DD won't let either Dh or I do the dishes, it's a huge pain, and they can't be done when she is napping or asleep at night because our kitchen sink is against the bedroom wall (the kitchen and bedroom share a wall) so it wakes her up It's gotten to where I either just let her cry at my feet so I can get a few dishes done at a time, or one of us takes her out and the other does dishes. So just sympathy here!
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