Reply Hey Mom! Learn more about the Gerber Life Insurance Grow-Up Plan!
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 07-08-2012, 06:28 PM   #11
qsefthuko's Avatar
qsefthuko
Registered Users
sitesupporter
seller
seller
 
Join Date: May 2011
Posts: 16,279
Re: Your thoughts please..... and support

What she did was abusive. I would absolutely report her. I would push as hard as I could to have her removed.

Advertisement

qsefthuko is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-08-2012, 06:56 PM   #12
TooBusyBearcubs's Avatar
TooBusyBearcubs
Registered Users
Formerly: K**ten
seller
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Posts: 973
My Mood:
Re: Your thoughts please..... and support

I am a Christian, church-going mother myself who has worked in various church nurseries and preschool Sunday school, and I am 100% BEHIND YOU IN NOT LEAVING YOUR CHILD WITH THAT WOMAN AGAIN. Her behavior was unacceptable. Nursery workers are there to help and support you, NOT to question your parenting style or make you feel like a bad mommy.
That said, I wouldn't contact the just the pastor. Most churches have someone (a Children's Ministry, Preschool Ministry, or Discipleship Minister/Leader) who directly oversees Sunday School and their teaching staff/volunteers. Check the church website - their email is probably on there. I would absolutely email the sunday school director, and CC: the pastor.
There are some people who think that their presence in the nursery gives them more authority than they really have. Granted, most nursery workers will try to calm a child down before calling for help, but once it is clear that there is something wrong, it is NOT the nursery worker's job to parent the child. Most churches instruct their workers to call an administrator in at that point, and they go get get the parents.
This woman (and anyone who was present in the room and supporting her inappropriate actions) needs to be removed from the nursery. It does not sound like she is being a good example of Christ's love or compassion to the kids in her care, OR to the parents who place their trust in her.
__________________
Wife to Charming Caveman Mama to BamBam and BuggyBear
A quiet m/c 2/23/13
Resting on God's promises and listening for the "sunergei" of God's perfect symphony. Prayers greatly appreciated!

Last edited by TooBusyBearcubs; 07-08-2012 at 06:58 PM.
TooBusyBearcubs is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-08-2012, 07:05 PM   #13
mibarra
Registered Users
seller
 
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 8,965
I don't like the way they talked to you one bit. I would jave told them straight up they were there to watch my child, NOT tell me how to parent. I don't feel comfortable leaving my child anywhere I'm not welcome to stay. And I don't think ignoring a baby his first time alone in the nursery is helpful. What did she have to do? Isn't their whole purpose to play with and watch the children? ?? Reading this makes me sick for you. So sorry mama.

You need to report her behavior, she doesn't sound qualified to watch a child at all....

Last edited by mibarra; 07-08-2012 at 07:07 PM.
mibarra is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-08-2012, 07:12 PM   #14
Vivhop98's Avatar
Vivhop98
Registered Users
seller
 
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Bloomington, IN
Posts: 4,394
My Mood:
Re: Your thoughts please..... and support

It is natural for kids to cry when being left in a strange place. A good daycare provider will hold the child and attempt to calm the child down the best she can. It sounds like she was vindictive and trying to teach him a "lesson". I would also be livid and I would report her. She was terrible. I am so sorry.
__________________
Vivian, wife to Ben,poet, Homeschooling mama to B-9,M-5, S-3 :
"Past the mission and I smell the roses"
Vivhop98 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-08-2012, 07:16 PM   #15
Nerissa
Registered Users
seller
 
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: small town USA
Posts: 5,419
My Mood:
Re: Your thoughts please..... and support

Oh my goodness that is horrible. Now way would I ever leave my child with that woman again.

The ladies at our church nursery are all about snuggling and sooting crying babies and if they can't they go get mom or dad.

DS2 would always cry for a few seconds (no more than a minute) and then he would be fine. On the few times he didn't settle right they always came and got me.
__________________
wife and mom-- no other special labels. Just trying to do the best I can.
Nerissa is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-08-2012, 07:16 PM   #16
TooBusyBearcubs's Avatar
TooBusyBearcubs
Registered Users
Formerly: K**ten
seller
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Posts: 973
My Mood:
Re: Your thoughts please..... and support

Also wanted to add...
As a former nursery worker myself, and a mom of two, I know what separation anxiety looks like. A child who is going through separation anxiety will fuss for a few minutes at the beginning, maybe fuss a couple of times during the service, but be ok most of the rest of the time. What you describe sounds like your LO doesn't trust the people who were taking care of him. Smart kiddo.
Also, you may want to remind those nursery workers that their expectations of the social behavior of toddlers is ridiculous. It is perfectly normal and developmentally appropriate for toddlers to engage in PARALLEL PLAY - playing near each other, but not together. Most kids do not start actively playing together until they are at least 3, sometimes 4 or 5.
Their judgement of your parenting, and their actions based on that judgement, are WAY out of line.
With that, I must stop typing, or I will say something that does not honor Jesus.
Hope you find a church with a more loving and compassionate staff, mama.
__________________
Wife to Charming Caveman Mama to BamBam and BuggyBear
A quiet m/c 2/23/13
Resting on God's promises and listening for the "sunergei" of God's perfect symphony. Prayers greatly appreciated!
TooBusyBearcubs is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-08-2012, 07:16 PM   #17
KLJ07's Avatar
KLJ07
Registered Users
seller
seller
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Posts: 607
My Mood:
Re: Your thoughts please..... and support

What that lady did what NOT ok! I would absolutely be finding another church asap! I really think you need to contact the Pastor and let them know about this lady's actions because she does not need to treat children like that. I know exactly how you feel (even though our nursery is wonderful)...I keep my babes with me for a long time before putting them in the nursery. I think I may have punched that lady in the face in that situation!
KLJ07 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-08-2012, 07:23 PM   #18
jjgammon's Avatar
jjgammon
Registered Users
seller
seller
 
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Enid, OK
Posts: 660
My Mood:
Re: Your thoughts please..... and support

Oh man, she's lucky it wasn't me. It may be a very un-Christian thing, but I probably would have hauled off & slugged her. I'm a little overprotective of my kids in the wild. At home it's all free range, but I dare someone else to even LOOK at my babies wrong.
__________________
Jessica - Wife to Rickey & SAHMama to Kahlan (3/29/08) & Elliott (3/29/11)
No, those birthday's aren't a typo either.
My eBay seller feedback & Etsy shop feedback
My ISO/IHA thread
jjgammon is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-08-2012, 07:33 PM   #19
Holly dolly's Avatar
Holly dolly
Registered Users
seller
seller
 
Join Date: Feb 2012
Posts: 3,001
My Mood:
Quote:
Originally Posted by tallanvor
Before you head off to find another church, if that's what you and DH feel God calling you to do, please speak to the pastor. Even if you leave, he needs to know your reasons so that he can take steps to see it doesn't happen again. Her behavior is not acceptable and she needs to be held accountable for it.

Try to not beat yourself up over this. We all make mistakes, unfortunately, so you are certainly not alone.
This. This lady should NOT be in leadership. It is one thing to offer advice if it is requested but her single "lesson" in the nursery has taught him nothing but to fear other people.

I would definitely bring this up with the pastor...and...as hard as it is...with her.
__________________

Wife to Casey Mom to Isaac and Carson Hoping for someone new in 2014
Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.
Holly dolly is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-08-2012, 07:39 PM   #20
trying4more's Avatar
trying4more
Registered Users
seller
seller
 
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: North. Bay Area, Cali.
Posts: 9,526
My Mood:
Re: Your thoughts please..... and support

find a new church!
__________________
Ariana Armando
{M.o3'} {E.o5'} {C.o9'} {S.12'} {D.14'}
.o8 .13
trying4more is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump

Copyright 2005 - 2014 Escalate Media. All Rights Reserved.