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Old 08-04-2012, 11:54 AM   #21
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Re: Child Support Plus Extras

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I would tell her that you will do the best you can, but with not much notice and it being back to school time, you cannot afford to get new of all of it right now. I'd say something like..."Things are tough here and we buy all the kids things at the consignment store. I will look when I am there this week to see if they have any of those things, but this pay period, with buying school supplies and other things for all 5 kids, I can't swing new Under Armour stuff. I can get the socks and headbands, though."

I looked on Amazon, and the shorts run about $20.

Do you have a Play It Again Sports near you? Or some type of sports consignment store?
Nope, we live in the boonies LOL. I am seriously a master thrift store shopper though. I have an ebay store, and that is exactly what I do-buy from thrift stores and re-sell for profit. I've actually sold under armour before, and already had a pair of XS shorts here that are listed on ebay, but those are too small, but yesterday I found a pair of sz small for 3.50.

If my girls were in gymnastics or something (they aren't, they'd love to be but first $ and second there is no gymnastics center here lol), I'd buy used leotards.

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Old 08-04-2012, 12:00 PM   #22
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Re: Child Support Plus Extras

I grew up with my dad paying my mom $225/month child support. During school there were times my mom needed to ask for extras, mostly during high school. I needed an expensive calculator and he sent an older model of the same sort. I was grateful although there were drawbacks, my teacher had the newer version and taught off that. I had to figure out how to use mine, kinda tricky but no biggie. She also asked for help getting my senior ring and he declined. I was kinda sad but my grandma and great grandma surprised me with one
My thoughts are that if its only a once in awhile thing, why not help. If its all the time, discuss it with DH and decide what you all feel is most important.
As for used gear, my cousin coaches football and insists on new gear for players. He thinks the same as pp DHs, new gear that touches skin and helmets should be new. I would think if the gear looked and smelled newer it shouldn't be a problem buying used. I would buy used for my kids.
How does your DH feel about it?
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Old 08-04-2012, 12:00 PM   #23
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Re: Child Support Plus Extras

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Old 08-04-2012, 12:02 PM   #24
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Re: Child Support Plus Extras

my ex doesnt give me a dime. i never ask him to pay for activity stuff because it's my choice to put him in these activities. i also think that child support should be going toward stuff like that.
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Old 08-04-2012, 12:15 PM   #25
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Re: Child Support Plus Extras

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I grew up with my dad paying my mom $225/month child support. During school there were times my mom needed to ask for extras, mostly during high school. I needed an expensive calculator and he sent an older model of the same sort. I was grateful although there were drawbacks, my teacher had the newer version and taught off that. I had to figure out how to use mine, kinda tricky but no biggie. She also asked for help getting my senior ring and he declined. I was kinda sad but my grandma and great grandma surprised me with one
My thoughts are that if its only a once in awhile thing, why not help. If its all the time, discuss it with DH and decide what you all feel is most important.
As for used gear, my cousin coaches football and insists on new gear for players. He thinks the same as pp DHs, new gear that touches skin and helmets should be new. I would think if the gear looked and smelled newer it shouldn't be a problem buying used. I would buy used for my kids.
How does your DH feel about it?
he's fine buying used. It's just what we do. I called him when I found the shorts and he said to get them.
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Old 08-04-2012, 02:07 PM   #26
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Re: Child Support Plus Extras

I'm okay with used gear, but not under armour. That gets soaked in sweat! Yes, it gets washed more often (like after every use), but that's essentially because its an undergarment. Good luck!
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Old 08-04-2012, 02:12 PM   #27
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I'm okay with used gear, but not under armour. That gets soaked in sweat! Yes, it gets washed more often (like after every use), but that's essentially because its an undergarment. Good luck!
I agree. And coming from a family very split up with ex's left and right and child support going in AND out, I really think its not unreasonable. And if it's something that needs to be re-evaluated in support paperwork, you should go into that. Can you imagine being a child without dental insurance while your 1/2 siblings have it? I've been the 1/2 sibling. And have had my 1/2 siblings not get things I did. But my parents honestly worked very hard to provide for all the kids. Sometimes that's outside the child support payment. Never heard them gripe. Ever.

I think used under garments are very very personal. You should ask the child how he feels.
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Old 08-04-2012, 03:47 PM   #28
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Re: Child Support Plus Extras

What does your DH say. I would price the stuff on line and send her a check and ask her to mail you a receipt so you can see she bought the stuff for him. or buy the stuff yourself and mail to him. As far as dental insurance I think its a rip off. I would just get her to tell you where he will go to the dentist and you can pay over the phone half of the bill. Just tell her to let you know a few months in advance when his appointment will be so you can plan. Child support can be tough. I know alot of moms who get cs and don't use if towards the children then they are always asking for more money.
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Old 08-04-2012, 04:08 PM   #29
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Re: Child Support Plus Extras

When it comes to ex's, baby's daddy's or mommy's there is usually so much dislike! Child support guidelines are just that. They are the MINIMUM amount the other parent must pay to stay out of jail or out of court. This doesn't end the obligation of that parent to help out with his or her child(ren). Raising children is very expensive and every child should have the basics as well as some of the extra things in life. Why shouldn't a kid get to do a sport, team or club? If it costs each parent some money above the minimum amount, so what? If the parent's had stayed together it wouldn't be such an issue, would it? Why should the child suffer because the parent's couldn't work out their relationship?
My last pet peeve is how the ex's new partner "hates" or "dislikes" the other parent because of what the ex says. Of course my ex tells his new wife I am the biggest Bi%$ on the planet! He tells her he shouldn't have to pay child support because he doesn't want to! How dumb are these other people? If my current husband gave me that line of crap I would laugh. Thank goodness he doesn't have any ex's or kids with anyone else, but if he did I would make sure he did the right thing. The lesson to this story is to only believe half of what your current partner tells you about their ex and hopefully their ex won't believe all the bad stuff about you
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Old 08-04-2012, 04:09 PM   #30
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Yes we buy new for bdays. In fact his bday is the 13th, and we already have stuff in the amazon cart to send him, but then she asked for this stuff, so now have an extra expense to budget in...
Can you just get him the stuff new as his b-day present?
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