SOS for some emotional support

[Chasing Zen]

Maybe call your doctor? Perhaps therapy and/or meds might be needed. In addition to the changes in your home, your body is undergoing a lot of changes right now as well. Do what you need to get to a better place, there's no sense in suffering Mama.

[mom1mg]

Sorry we aren't adoptive/foster parents but I like to lurk here and your thread got me thinking...
I had depression DURING pregnancy not after. I don't think it is super common because no-one talks about it but you really could be going through PPD already. For me I snapped out of it almost right after DD (baby 5) was born. I was never depressed during other pregnancies. I will send a little prayer that in a couple weeks you too will be enjoying new baby and new found happiness!

[WynneBabies]

I'm another who suffered with pretty severe depression during pregnancy. I had it with #1, #3 and #4 being the worst with the first and fourth. Interestingly I was totally fine after the first and fourth were born (no PPD) but I had bad PPD after my third was born. My second I had none before or after. Very random.

Honestly though, that is absolutely huge to take on being so close to giving birth not to mention all the really young children you already have. I couldn't do it. I needed to wait until my youngest was almost two before I felt I could emotionally handle another baby/toddler. Obviously that's just me, but fostering/adoption is filled with all kinds of weird emotions most have never felt before.

[Robin]

((hugs))

[hollyecat]

Originally Posted by Mama2ManyBoyz Ok...I'm going to type this out and I want you to reread this as often as needed. What you are feeling is completley normal!!! I have felt it every time a new one has come in! Don't allow yourself to think that way. Focus on the positive. Take time to enjoy each child individually even if just for a few moments at a time. Again I felt this way EVERY time. You are in a new season. There are pros and cons to all seasons of motherhood. I see your a believer...I firmly believe that those thoughts are from the enemy. I will post again with the title of a book I just started reading, but one of the most powerful things I've read is that when you step into the foster/adoption world you are storming the gates of hell and beginning a spiritual battle for that child. Wow. I felt exactly how you are feeling before. Just four weeks ago when we took our dfd. I almost let her go. One month in and I'm ready to adopt, God willing, and I love her like my others. Hang in there Mama!

I LOVE this advice. Y'all are amazing women and families for opening your lives to these little ones. I don't feel as selfless. But I can and will pray for you Mama!

[Believer318]

Thanks for all the support. Things are definitely going better. I'm just taking one day at a time, remembering the goals of fostercare- to show this child what a healthy family looks like, and not worry so much about the future! I get so caught up in should we/shouldn't we adopt him (which isn't on the table yet anyway), that I miss today. We're still not sure about getting respite for him while we have the birth...like maybe for a couple weeks but still have him visit during that time. Or just keep plugging away. What would you do/have you done?

[Mama2ManyBoyz]

I've had little ones for respite and I honestly think it's pretty hard on them. They don't understand that it's just temporary. It's almost like starting over in a new home for them. I feel like they kind of bond to you, like you're their new Mom. But if that's what you need to do to make things more manageable, then by all means. Just know it might feel like starting over again once he comes home. So glad to hear it's going better!

[dasher8604]

I understand what you are going through. I was a wreck during both pregnancies, so I'm sure 80% of it is just hormones running wild. It sounds as if he is fitting in well, so if you are even considering adopting him, I would say let him stay during the post birth period, show him he is part of the family. You wouldn't send your bio kids away, so treat him the same (this is just what I would do). We are about to adopt our first child, and we have a 5 year old and 2 year old bios. I keep feeling bad lately for my almost six year old. We don't get much one on one time as it is because our toddler is high maintenance, and now we are adding a three year old to the mix and I worry about it. But then I remind myself why we are doing this, and that having my son shook up our daughters life as well, but we wouldn't have just given him up because of it. We will all adjust to the changes soon

[CalebAndJadensMommy]

Originally Posted by mom1mg Sorry we aren't adoptive/foster parents but I like to lurk here and your thread got me thinking... I had depression DURING pregnancy not after. I don't think it is super common because no-one talks about it but you really could be going through PPD already. For me I snapped out of it almost right after DD (baby 5) was born. I was never depressed during other pregnancies. I will send a little prayer that in a couple weeks you too will be enjoying new baby and new found happiness!

YES! I experienced Postpartum depression with my first child within weeks following delivery. HOWEVER, I started experiencing symptoms within the first trimester with my second! My OB-GYN said that it is very common and most women don't know that they can experience it DURING pregnancy. Definitely CALL YOUR DOCTOR ASAP. I will be praying that you find the answers you need. :-)