Reply Hey Mom! Learn more about the Gerber Life Insurance Grow-Up Plan!
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 08-21-2012, 11:46 AM   #1
evasimone's Avatar
evasimone
Registered Users
seller
seller
 
Join Date: Sep 2011
Posts: 2,015
SIL wants to take our baby name

I am 5 months along. DH and I have a boy and a girl name picked because we are team green. My SIL is 7 months along and is having a girl. My MIL told her our names and now she wants to use our girl name. I know she didn't choose the name randomly because my MIL told me her 3 girl names. Not to mention its a rare name. So I know MIL told her our girl name.

I am so upset. What should I do? I am debating on telling her that I am not okay with her taking our name, especially because we only have that name without a back up and we were 100% sure its the name we were doing. But then I don't want to create family drama.

DH seems to feel like we should just go ahead and name our child what we had already decided but I am not so sure about that.

Opinions?

Advertisement

__________________
E, wife to my rock, S 2009
Mama to DD 1/13
evasimone is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-21-2012, 11:48 AM   #2
escapethevillage's Avatar
escapethevillage
Registered Users
 
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Arizona
Posts: 8,351
My Mood:
Re: SIL wants to take our baby name

I would first ask her where she got the idea. Tell her that it was the name you chose, and if you have a girl, you are still naming her the original name, and both cousins will have the same name.

That might send her on a search for a new name.
__________________
escapethevillage is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-21-2012, 11:49 AM   #3
doodah's Avatar
doodah
Registered Users
seller
 
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: USA
Posts: 9,958
Re: SIL wants to take our baby name

I would ask her if she has decided on a name yet. Since her baby is due first, there is nothing you can do if she decides to for sure use your idea. You can ask her nicely to not use that name but only you would know if she would respect your wishes or not....maybe she is the kind of person to go ahead and use it, just to prove she can.
doodah is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-21-2012, 11:50 AM   #4
iwiamandaiwi's Avatar
iwiamandaiwi
Registered Users
 
Join Date: Sep 2010
Posts: 1,218
Re: SIL wants to take our baby name

Quote:
Originally Posted by escapethevillage View Post
I would first ask her where she got the idea. Tell her that it was the name you chose, and if you have a girl, you are still naming her the original name, and both cousins will have the same name.

That might send her on a search for a new name.
great advice. I'd do that. I'm curious what the name was?
__________________
Breastfeeding , Cloth Diapering, Babywearing Mommy, to Dylan Michael (September 2007) Aiden Edward (March 2011) and anxiously waiting for Katherine Sophia due in MAY!
iwiamandaiwi is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-21-2012, 11:51 AM   #5
misskira
Banned - User Requested
seller
seller
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Western Oregon
Posts: 7,162
My Mood:
Re: SIL wants to take our baby name

I would call her up and say "mil just told me your girl name! Isn't it funny that we have the exact same name picked out if our lo is a girl?!" and see what she says. I wouldn't make a big scene, as it won't get you anywhere good. There is a 50% chance it won't matter if you have a boy. If she seems adamant about using it, I would let her and pick a new name. And then know in the future to keep it secret until the birth day.
misskira is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-21-2012, 11:51 AM   #6
Lady_B's Avatar
Lady_B
Registered Users
seller
seller
 
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Missouri
Posts: 1,780
My Mood:
Is your dh and his sis close enough to where he can call her and say" hey we had that name first and we know you go it from mom telling you ours so we'd really like you not to use it"

However. You are team green and what if you have a boy. Then it's kinda a mute point kwim?

I'd call mil and tell her how upset you are too. Did you tell her not to tell anyone? Reality is there will always be someone else who has had that name before somewhere in the world.
__________________
Wife to a HOT MARINE since 01-05-2008
Momma to a sassy little lady since 2008 <3
and a handsome little man 01-18-2012 <3
Owner and designer of Butterfly Elephants, waldorf style dolls
Lady_B is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-21-2012, 11:56 AM   #7
MDever
Registered Users
seller
seller
 
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: Maryland
Posts: 6,873
My Mood:
Re: SIL wants to take our baby name

I am not nearly as nice as the other ladies. That would REALLY piss me off!! IMO this is crossing a line. I think your MIL needs to get involved since it was her big mouth. Also just because you might have a boy perhaps you will have a daughter in the future. I don't blame you one bit for being so upset. Do you see these people regularly?
__________________
Just in case.
MDever is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-21-2012, 11:58 AM   #8
squiddles
Registered Users
seller
 
Join Date: Mar 2009
Posts: 1,907
Re: SIL wants to take our baby name

.

Last edited by squiddles; 07-23-2013 at 11:13 AM.
squiddles is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-21-2012, 12:00 PM   #9
luvsviola's Avatar
luvsviola
Registered Users
seller
seller
 
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Central Indiana
Posts: 17,103
My Mood:
Quote:
Originally Posted by doodah
I would ask her if she has decided on a name yet. Since her baby is due first, there is nothing you can do if she decides to for sure use your idea. You can ask her nicely to not use that name but only you would know if she would respect your wishes or not....maybe she is the kind of person to go ahead and use it, just to prove she can.
This. I would talk to her, but ultimately no one owns a name.
__________________
Kristen
Middle school teacher by day, super mom by night
Mommy to The Boss~2007, The Energizer Bunny~2009, and The Princess~2011
My kids are no longer in diapers, but somehow, my computer keeps finding its way back here...
luvsviola is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-21-2012, 12:07 PM   #10
ktmelody
No Longer Here
 
Join Date: Jan 2007
Posts: 20,304
My Mood:
Re: SIL wants to take our baby name

When I was pregnant with my second (a girl) we chose the name Isabella....my mom told my brother and they called me and said I could not use the name because that was their name for their daughter (who they were not even pregnant with yet, and were not for 2 more years). I said fine, although it really pissed me off. I still could have used the name, but we found a better one anyways. Of course 2 years later my niece was born and named Isabelle.

I wouldnt say anything. She is further along than you, knows she is having a girl and no one owns a name. Sucks, but I sometimes wish my brother had never called me to say that...it def. put a rift in our relationship for a long time.
ktmelody is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump

Copyright 2005 - 2014 Escalate Media. All Rights Reserved.