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Old 09-10-2012, 12:29 PM   #211
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Re: Pregnancy After Loss (Sept 1st - 15th)

Those things are hard....Our 7yr old DD prays every night for a healthy baby that stays alive because she wants to know what it's like to take care of a baby.....

AFM....nothing much going on with me...starting to feel "Baby Doe", I think....feels like popcorn and flutters.....I.LOVE.IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Have a good day all!!

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Old 09-10-2012, 02:46 PM   #212
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Re: Pregnancy After Loss (Sept 1st - 15th)

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Oh.... kids just don't mince words do they? They are so clear and honest in their feelings. That's sweet though, that he is sensitive and hopeful for another little one in your family.

AFM: My appointment today took forever, but it was goodness (well, other than the FIVE tries to collect blood - my poor arms look beat up ). The u/s tech is so sweet. This is my second one with her and I really, really like her. I think she tells more than she's supposed to - the old one would make us wait until the doc was in the room (and this was with our normal pregnancy). But this gal is chatty and explains everything as she goes. Our little one was kicking and waving like crazy! I got 2 nice little face pics and a profile. We asked her to take a guess on gender just for kicks, and she said she would lean towards a girl based on what she sees now, but of course it's very early. But we all spent a good amount of time looking at the "goods" and she explained that because the bits were pointed more upward, they look like labia to her - where in boys she sees them pointed more towards the rear and are forming testes (sorry, that's hard to understand in writing... makes more sense when you're looking at the u/s as she's explaining it). I laughed because I have been saying that with all this drama, it's probably a girl!! I will gladly take either one though - really, honestly, and truly. I could care less as long as this baby is healthy and happy
Nope, he sure didn't. And that's totally okay. Cuz honestly? I feel the exact same way!

FTR, the kids still don't officially know about this pregnancy. I think they all suspect, because of my size, but they haven't said much and we haven't outright told them. I've talked to DH about it, but I don't think he's ready to tell them yet.

for a great appt!

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Oh, kids and their brutal honesty. I know you know he didn't mean to upset you, but that must have still be really hard to hear...and hard for so many reasons.
It wasn't really hard to hear - it was kinda nice to know I'm not the only one feeling that way! When I told DH he said "Did you tell him you hope so too?"

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AFM....nothing much going on with me...starting to feel "Baby Doe", I think....feels like popcorn and flutters.....I.LOVE.IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I can't wait to start feeling something here.
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Old 09-10-2012, 06:21 PM   #213
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Re: Pregnancy After Loss (Sept 1st - 15th)

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This little baby is with them for sure for 3 months, after that it all depends on what happens with the parents. It sounds like she won't be able to go home with them, but they don't want to give up rights and are going to fight things. So it could be much longer that she'll live with this family.

This year, after losing Elli, I don't think the kids could handle connecting with another baby and "losing" him/her, kwim? I don't know that we could either. And with this new pregnancy, definitely things won't be happening too soon.

AFM: Forgot to mention, but meant to - I didn't get a chance to respond to Zech, unfortunately, cuz it was a passing comment and Levi ran up to us, but we'd walked past a pregnant mama and Zech said "Mom, I hope we have another baby like Elliana... except, you know, one that doesn't die."
Oof. Kick in the guts. Right there.
Oh I totally get how it wouldn't be good for your family right now. We mostly have teenagers. The one toddler girl we had this past year made my husband look at me and say "I really want a girl". It was rough.

Kids are brutally honest, so they say it like it is and it is tough sometimes!

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I sooooooo know what you mean! Every little successful milestone feels like a small victory, but the marathon feels like it's just beginning for us. And even though I'm feeling better every time I see/hear our baby, I'm growing more and more anxious about actually delivering. I just want this baby in my arms safely!!

I have too, but I've always thought of it as something we would do waaaay down the line. I think foster parents are so amazingly strong, and my poor heart doesn't have the strength to handle some of the hardships that I would be afraid we would have to deal with. I have a hard enough time letting my foster dogs get adopted... I couldn't handle a human foster baby right now, not until my heart has some time to heal. Foster parents are amazing people in my book!

AFM: I stayed away from DS over the weekend, because I kept finding myself wandering over to read sad stories of loss and request for prayer. Weekends are the worst for me. I don't know why, it's not like having the doctor's office open that day would change anything, but I get uneasy with them not being there on the weekend .

My appointment today took forever, but it was goodness (well, other than the FIVE tries to collect blood - my poor arms look beat up ). The u/s tech is so sweet. This is my second one with her and I really, really like her. I think she tells more than she's supposed to - the old one would make us wait until the doc was in the room (and this was with our normal pregnancy). But this gal is chatty and explains everything as she goes. Our little one was kicking and waving like crazy! I got 2 nice little face pics and a profile. We asked her to take a guess on gender just for kicks, and she said she would lean towards a girl based on what she sees now, but of course it's very early. But we all spent a good amount of time looking at the "goods" and she explained that because the bits were pointed more upward, they look like labia to her - where in boys she sees them pointed more towards the rear and are forming testes (sorry, that's hard to understand in writing... makes more sense when you're looking at the u/s as she's explaining it). I laughed because I have been saying that with all this drama, it's probably a girl!! I will gladly take either one though - really, honestly, and truly. I could care less as long as this baby is healthy and happy
Yay for a great visit!! I think, as with everything, that fostering is just one of those things that has to work in your life.

I have to stay away from DS too for the same reason, cause I start getting negative and it isn't helpful.

A girl! We'll see A boy is just as great too, though.

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Originally Posted by Harmony96 View Post
That's hard. DD asked me the other day if she can hold this baby when he's born (since she didn't get to hold Jonathan at all while he was still alive).
Oh gosh, those questions are so rough on our hearts and minds.

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Originally Posted by finleyjudemommy View Post
Those things are hard....Our 7yr old DD prays every night for a healthy baby that stays alive because she wants to know what it's like to take care of a baby.....

AFM....nothing much going on with me...starting to feel "Baby Doe", I think....feels like popcorn and flutters.....I.LOVE.IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Have a good day all!!
Awesome! I'm glad you're feeling movement My son has asked that too, and prays for the baby often. He really wants a baby. I think my 4 yr old is starting to figure it out too, and the gleam in his eye is just a teensy bit scary.
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Old 09-11-2012, 08:14 AM   #214
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Re: Pregnancy After Loss (Sept 1st - 15th)

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Oh I totally get how it wouldn't be good for your family right now. We mostly have teenagers. The one toddler girl we had this past year made my husband look at me and say "I really want a girl". It was rough.
I don't think I'd want older kids - at least not while we have any of our kids still at home. That sounds bad... but I would worry far too much about the safety and well-being of our own kids with a long-term foster kid, kwim?
I would absolutely love to snuggle and take care of a newborn, though - and without all this pregnancy m/s and worry and fear to boot!
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Old 09-11-2012, 10:16 AM   #215
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Re: Pregnancy After Loss (Sept 1st - 15th)

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I don't think I'd want older kids - at least not while we have any of our kids still at home. That sounds bad... but I would worry far too much about the safety and well-being of our own kids with a long-term foster kid, kwim?
I would absolutely love to snuggle and take care of a newborn, though - and without all this pregnancy m/s and worry and fear to boot!
Most people don't want teens, so you're not alone in that. We aren't up for keeping them longer than a few days, but typically that's all they need because the kids are going to group homes. We have them one night, or maybe 3 nights, and then they're moving on, but most people refuse and I get it, but typically they're too scared to be a problem at all and my overly friendly kids love them to death so they feel really welcome.

One of my favorite memories of all time, was our first foster kid. 16 or 17 yr old boy, black (unfortunately that matters, people will say no), and he was a good sized boy, tall and everything. He got here, was so quiet, and our house was still in the rehab process so my husband asked him if he'd help him install a bedroom door (we were replacing ours) and the boy said okay, and the two of them worked on that, Jonathan taught him how to do it, and do it right, etc. We dropped him off the next morning and I spoke to his social worker a little while later. She just beamed and said that the boy had told her so proudly that he'd learned how to install a door! It's those little things that my kids will definitely take for granted, that other boys can only dream of- a solid, steady man who is there, patient, and wants to spend time with them, teaching them a skill. That memory is absolutely priceless to me.
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Old 09-11-2012, 12:43 PM   #216
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Re: Pregnancy After Loss (Sept 1st - 15th)

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Most people don't want teens, so you're not alone in that. We aren't up for keeping them longer than a few days, but typically that's all they need because the kids are going to group homes. We have them one night, or maybe 3 nights, and then they're moving on, but most people refuse and I get it, but typically they're too scared to be a problem at all and my overly friendly kids love them to death so they feel really welcome.

One of my favorite memories of all time, was our first foster kid. 16 or 17 yr old boy, black (unfortunately that matters, people will say no), and he was a good sized boy, tall and everything. He got here, was so quiet, and our house was still in the rehab process so my husband asked him if he'd help him install a bedroom door (we were replacing ours) and the boy said okay, and the two of them worked on that, Jonathan taught him how to do it, and do it right, etc. We dropped him off the next morning and I spoke to his social worker a little while later. She just beamed and said that the boy had told her so proudly that he'd learned how to install a door! It's those little things that my kids will definitely take for granted, that other boys can only dream of- a solid, steady man who is there, patient, and wants to spend time with them, teaching them a skill. That memory is absolutely priceless to me.
Sarah....that is so incredibly sweet. It's moments like those that should matter and most are few and far between....I worked for Children Services for 6 years and saw some horrible things!
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Old 09-11-2012, 01:47 PM   #217
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Been reading and thinking of you all. Have puked 3x in the last 90 mins. That's a lot for me. Usually it's just once every few weeks. I have a headache too, so I'm not sure if that's contributing. Even while I was hugging the toilet I was thanking Him in my head for this little baby. A bit awkward, lol.

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Old 09-11-2012, 01:53 PM   #218
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Re: Pregnancy After Loss (Sept 1st - 15th)

thinking of everyone today....I have a headache today I usually never get headaches when I'm pregnant, so I'm hoping that it goes away...I'm so ready (and nervous) for my appointment! One week to go....then maybe I can start to feel like this baby will stay with us! sad, but true...
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Old 09-11-2012, 03:08 PM   #219
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Re: Pregnancy After Loss (Sept 1st - 15th)

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One of my favorite memories of all time, was our first foster kid. 16 or 17 yr old boy, black (unfortunately that matters, people will say no), and he was a good sized boy, tall and everything. He got here, was so quiet, and our house was still in the rehab process so my husband asked him if he'd help him install a bedroom door (we were replacing ours) and the boy said okay, and the two of them worked on that, Jonathan taught him how to do it, and do it right, etc. We dropped him off the next morning and I spoke to his social worker a little while later. She just beamed and said that the boy had told her so proudly that he'd learned how to install a door! It's those little things that my kids will definitely take for granted, that other boys can only dream of- a solid, steady man who is there, patient, and wants to spend time with them, teaching them a skill. That memory is absolutely priceless to me.


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Been reading and thinking of you all. Have puked 3x in the last 90 mins. That's a lot for me. Usually it's just once every few weeks. I have a headache too, so I'm not sure if that's contributing. Even while I was hugging the toilet I was thanking Him in my head for this little baby. A bit awkward, lol.
Oh no! Sounds like you may have a tummy bug, too. Sucks to get tummy bugs while pregnant!

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thinking of everyone today....I have a headache today I usually never get headaches when I'm pregnant, so I'm hoping that it goes away...I'm so ready (and nervous) for my appointment! One week to go....then maybe I can start to feel like this baby will stay with us! sad, but true...
Headaches are the pits. I get migraines normally, and tend to get less while pregnant, but when I do get them they're terrible!
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Old 09-11-2012, 03:35 PM   #220
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Re: Pregnancy After Loss (Sept 1st - 15th)

uhg, headaches are the worst! I hope you guys feel better fast.
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