Reply Hey Mom! Learn more about the Gerber Life Insurance Grow-Up Plan!
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 04-03-2013, 03:31 AM   #1
maddies.mom's Avatar
maddies.mom
Registered Users
seller
 
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Pennsylvania
Posts: 440
annoyed with my "mom friends"

So a little of my background... I have a dd who will be 4 in May. I had 2 m/c's (one in 2010, one in 2011) and a very difficult time conceiving. I just hit 36 weeks.

I have lots of mama friends... I have hosted lots of "sprinkles" for friends 3rd and 4th babies and have spent alot of time and money over the past few years on gifts.

So, one of my friends set up a "playdate" last friday through facebook events. I knew it wasn't a traditional playdate because there were other friends invited that aren't in the same crowd (a couple of work friends and long distance friends)... I thought "how fun! I'm getting a little sprinkle!"...
well, I show up and there are only 2 Mom's there with their kiddos... and I have my dd. So it was 3 of us plus 5 kids. And they say - "it's a big sister party!!! we figured you didn't need anything, so we thought it would be nice to celebrate the fact that dd is going to be a big sister"....
and the gift... a stuffed animal.

Would this bug anyone else?? I was in tears that night about it!!

Advertisement

maddies.mom is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-03-2013, 04:17 AM   #2
nursenmom's Avatar
nursenmom
Registered Users
seller
seller
 
Join Date: Oct 2010
Posts: 648
Re: annoyed with my "mom friends"

I'm sure being 40 weeks pregnant myself right now that I would have likely reacted the same way if it was me. That being said, looking at it as an outsider, I think their hearts were in the right place. Both of my "sprinkles" have only had a 2-3 moms show up which is usually how most playdates go. When there are multiple kids involved, and especially this time of year we're lucky if half the people we invite to playdates show up, too many people to get sick, too much stuff going on. It was actually a creative idea, I think they were genuinely trying to be thoughtful but I would have been a little disappointed too.

By the way, do you know if you are having another girl? I could see this being another reason they didn't think you needed a traditional sprinkle/shower

Eta: I see you are team green, maybe they are waiting to get you a small present until after the baby comes and see what you need?
__________________
Currently a SAHM trying to be the best wife to my amazing hubby, and best mommy to my sweet girls that I can be

Last edited by nursenmom; 04-03-2013 at 04:19 AM.
nursenmom is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-03-2013, 07:37 AM   #3
Mom2Connor's Avatar
Mom2Connor
Registered Users
 
Join Date: Jul 2011
Posts: 3,283
I would have been hurt too! I don't know anyone who does sprinkles here, so I was a little hurt but couldn't let it get to me. There was actually stuff we needed too.

I would have been super hurt if it was the norm and I didn't get one.
__________________
Proud SAHM to Connor (8-6-10) and our little born 4-14-13
Mom2Connor is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-03-2013, 08:07 AM   #4
canadianbakers's Avatar
canadianbakers
Registered Users
seller
 
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: MB, Canada
Posts: 9,221
My Mood:
Re: annoyed with my "mom friends"

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mom2Connor View Post
I would have been super hurt if it was the norm and I didn't get one.
I guess if that's true I would be hurt.
But for me, here, it wouldn't bother me. At least they tried to do something nice for you, even if it wasn't exactly what you were hoping for - "the thought that counts" and all that.

My view on this is skewed, though. Noone has thrown us a baby shower for any of our babies, so I'd just be happy someone did something!
__________________
~Elena~
Momma to R (12), Z (10), I (8), L (4), P (2) & J (Apr 14, 2015)
remembering Elliana Lucy (2.7.12)
canadianbakers is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-03-2013, 08:32 AM   #5
MrsCrafty's Avatar
MrsCrafty
Registered Users
Formerly: mommy2wyatt
seller
seller
 
Join Date: Feb 2007
Posts: 5,882
My Mood:
Re: annoyed with my "mom friends"

I'm sorry If it was the norm I might be a little hurt, but it's still nice that they did something.
I think now that I'm married with kids I realize more how nice it is to show up at showers. When I was single I wouldn't always go, but now that I know how that feels to the bride/mom-to-be I definitely try to go or atleast send a card.
__________________
Denise, building a life with B my farmer, Mom to L 09.2006, W 12.2006, A 04.2013, and B 09.2014 and one angel 10.24.2013
MrsCrafty is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-03-2013, 08:41 AM   #6
Mom2Connor's Avatar
Mom2Connor
Registered Users
 
Join Date: Jul 2011
Posts: 3,283
Quote:
Originally Posted by mommy2wyatt
I'm sorry If it was the norm I might be a little hurt, but it's still nice that they did something.
I think now that I'm married with kids I realize more how nice it is to show up at showers. When I was single I wouldn't always go, but now that I know how that feels to the bride/mom-to-be I definitely try to go or atleast send a card.
Me too! I wish I got invited to more, I love buying baby gifts!
__________________
Proud SAHM to Connor (8-6-10) and our little born 4-14-13
Mom2Connor is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-03-2013, 08:59 AM   #7
maddies.mom's Avatar
maddies.mom
Registered Users
seller
 
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Pennsylvania
Posts: 440
Re: annoyed with my "mom friends"

I think more of it is the fact that even though I am married with my own kiddo, my own struggles, life, work, etc... I always either helped with the hosting or pitched in for a gift (one mama it was her 4th girl... and 3 of us went in on a VERY nice gift card to Joanne Fabrics for her because she is a sewer/crafter)... another one it was her 3rd baby, second boy and we all met (without kids) for breakfast, paid for breakfast, PLUS got diapers/wipes/newborn fun stuff... another one I hosted at my house - again, second boy and we did a Mom's night in with a pot luck dinner plus gifts... another was second boy and we all did a Mom's night out with dinner, pitched in for her dinner bill, plus gifts... It's just always been something the group has done. If it wasn't done for every other person... It really wouldn't bother me I suppose!

Being team green usually doesn't make a difference with these sprinkles... it's usually more of a fun time for just the Mama's to get together without kiddos. How in the world did I get the one time ever "big sister party"? I could really use the breakfast or the night out more than any gift!! Hanging out with friends is a rarity these days!! I certainly appreciate that they did something, but c'mon... a stuffed animal? We have so many stuffed animals and toys and crap!
maddies.mom is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-03-2013, 09:35 AM   #8
mibarra
Registered Users
seller
 
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 8,975
I've never even heard of a sprinkle before

Except for my work, no baby showers after my 1st baby. I do have a few close friends that we get each other little baby gifts for subsequent babies but that's it. Based on your description I'd be hurt too. The problem with being the organizer is there's no one to organize for you! They did make an attempt at least. Sorry mama!!
mibarra is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-03-2013, 09:52 AM   #9
canadianbakers's Avatar
canadianbakers
Registered Users
seller
 
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: MB, Canada
Posts: 9,221
My Mood:
Re: annoyed with my "mom friends"

Quote:
Originally Posted by maddies.mom View Post
It's just always been something the group has done. If it wasn't done for every other person... It really wouldn't bother me I suppose!
Now, reading that - yes, I would be hurt. And angry. They love it when you do that for them but won't do it for you? Not cool.
And a stuffed animal would really bother me. I hate stuffies. We have TONS.
__________________
~Elena~
Momma to R (12), Z (10), I (8), L (4), P (2) & J (Apr 14, 2015)
remembering Elliana Lucy (2.7.12)
canadianbakers is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-03-2013, 01:01 PM   #10
bai18176's Avatar
bai18176
Registered Users
seller
seller
 
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Oregon
Posts: 716
My Mood:
Re: annoyed with my "mom friends"

Quote:
Originally Posted by canadianbakers View Post
Now, reading that - yes, I would be hurt. And angry. They love it when you do that for them but won't do it for you? Not cool.
And a stuffed animal would really bother me. I hate stuffies. We have TONS.
That stinks.
__________________
Brook, wife to D, mama of S('05), I('06), E('08), E ('11), Adella & Bria (4/16/13)
bai18176 is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump

Copyright 2005 - 2014 Escalate Media. All Rights Reserved.