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Old 09-17-2012, 12:52 PM   #161
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Re: babywise

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I'm sorry I was misunderstood. I didn't mean she said everyone else was doing it wrong. I was talking about the tone of the book itself.

ETA. I feel the same way with books that say AP is the only way. I don't follow anything to a t. I take buys and pieces from several places and follow what my instincts tell me.

I have also already said I am glad it works for others. I Juliet don't like it claiming to be the only way.
That's for explaining that. I agree that BW, as well as the Sears AP books, and many other parents books make it sound like its right vs wrong, good vs bad, all or nothing. Scheduling is a tool, a framework we use in how we raise our babies. It isn't the total sum of what we do nor is it the sole determinant in how we parent. Its part, a huge part, for our infants, but by no means is it the whole picture.

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Old 09-17-2012, 12:54 PM   #162
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I don't think anyone said that, including myself. But I'm absolutely not going to take parenting advice from anyone, regardless of their philosophy, if they cannot sustain a relationship with their own children.
That seems pretty obvious on the surface but a) we're talking about getting babies to eat and sleep on a schedule here and not talking about what happens after toddlerhood (which IME is where I see breakdowns begin, followed next by the teen years) and b) it's not always the parents' fault when a relationship breaks down. It takes two to do that.
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Old 09-17-2012, 12:55 PM   #163
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My mil gave it to me. I threw it away.
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Old 09-17-2012, 12:58 PM   #164
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Re: babywise

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That seems pretty obvious on the surface but a) we're talking about getting babies to eat and sleep on a schedule here and not talking about what happens after toddlerhood (which IME is where I see breakdowns begin, followed next by the teen years) and b) it's not always the parents' fault when a relationship breaks down. It takes two to do that.
My mother lives with me in a duplex attached to our house. My dad? I talk to him on the phone 6x/yr and see him 2x. He lives out of state and is not a safe, well, "balanced" person. Has nothing to do with his parenting or how I was raised, but everything to do with his choices nowadays.
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Old 09-17-2012, 01:09 PM   #165
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Old 09-17-2012, 01:11 PM   #166
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Originally Posted by GEMQEMCABOOSE

That's for explaining that. I agree that BW, as well as the Sears AP books, and many other parents books make it sound like its right vs wrong, good vs bad, all or nothing. Scheduling is a tool, a framework we use in how we raise our babies. It isn't the total sum of what we do nor is it the sole determinant in how we parent. Its part, a huge part, for our infants, but by no means is it the whole picture.
Thank you I understand that about you. The fact that your babies are not left to cry a lot on there own is a huge difference from what I have seen of BW. My friends who use it do have completely different lives than I do but we are still friends and still get along because of our many similarities as well. Like - all our kids play and learn and do funny things and we all love our children. I enjoy debate and I feel it is completely possible to disagree with what someone else does and still love them and have a great relationship. If it were not for differences this would be an boring world.

The funny thing. Is you would think my personality would totally fit with BW. My whole life is scheduled. I love schedule. I have a master grocery list. I have a laundry schedule. I do the exact same thing every morning - shower, feed kids, make my bed, open all the blinds and help the kids get their chores (get ready) done. For some reason though I hate schedule with my babies. It is the one area of life I just let happen. Maybe it is my bit of relief from feeling like I need to control everything else.
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Old 09-17-2012, 01:12 PM   #167
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Re: babywise

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Originally Posted by mcpforever View Post
That seems pretty obvious on the surface but a) we're talking about getting babies to eat and sleep on a schedule here and not talking about what happens after toddlerhood (which IME is where I see breakdowns begin, followed next by the teen years) and b) it's not always the parents' fault when a relationship breaks down. It takes two to do that.
a) Even small portions of parenting is still parenting. Would you accept driving lessons from someone who's license has been suspended for DUI? Overall, they seem capable of driving...
b) If I were the book buying type, I probably wouldn't buy books on conflict resolution from their children either. Especially in the absence of convincing credentials.
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Old 09-17-2012, 01:14 PM   #168
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Re: babywise

dbl post!!
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Old 09-17-2012, 01:14 PM   #169
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Re: babywise

I'd much prefer to co-sleep and nurse throughout the night, than to be stuck in the house bound by a strict nap schedule. Nap time doesn't sound so thrilling if I am sitting around at home pumping and cleaning pumps and bottles at that time. No thanks.

I have been able to successfully produce milk for two boys, a total of 58 months now...and I've never once worried about my maintaining supply. They cry, I offer milk first, it's usually all that they want, to be fed or just comforted
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Old 09-17-2012, 01:21 PM   #170
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Re: babywise

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I PM you Gem
PMd you back Megan. Hope it helps. Very common phenomenon you described. Give your Levi a big snuggle for us, from this Levi's mom.
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