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Old 09-18-2012, 11:39 AM   #21
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I would have stepped in quickly and said that is NOT NICE or said something to the mom. Especially if he put his hands on my son. But in the moment you didn't realize and didn't do anything wrong.

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Old 09-18-2012, 11:55 AM   #22
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Originally Posted by earthflower
When ds was 2 we went to a bday party at Chuckie Cheese, my first time w/ a kid there anyway a older girl shoved ds off a car while it was moving and got on to finish riding it, her dad was standing right there and did/said nothing, after picking up my sobbing toddler off the floor I scooped the girl off the ride and set her on the ground. The dad was so pissed off and we quickly left the toddler area, I ended up crying because everyone said I was in the wrong even though the girl was too old to even be on the toddler rides( she looked around 6-7yo) So yeah idk I guess I shouldn't have touched the kid.
I can understand your frustration. I would have been so angry at the parent for not stepping in. However I have to agree touching someone else's kid won't go over well.
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Old 09-18-2012, 11:55 AM   #23
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Re: How would you have reacted?

I am rude when it comes to these things. I would have yelled - GET AWAY, KID! - as I walked up to him. If that didn't work, I would have yelled at the mom to keep her kid away from mine or I would physically intervene. No one does that to my son.
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Old 09-18-2012, 01:08 PM   #24
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Re: How would you have reacted?

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Originally Posted by Erinne View Post
My dd is a little younger and not quite as verbal, but I've told other kids "please leave her alone, she doesn't want to play right now" when things like that are happening. If they keep bothering her, I'll tell my dd right in front of the kid and parent to come stay next to me because that other kid isn't being nice. I'm sure it might hurt some feelings, but when it's happening repeatedly and the parent doesn't do anything, it pisses me off enough that I don't really care.
This is pretty much what I do. I try to start out very polite, but that doesn't always work. I'm a fairly reserved person, but I'm not afraid to be firm with kids (or grownups!) when their innapropriate behavior is impacting my kids. They should be able to feel safe when they're with me.

Don't kick yourself about it, though. Sometimes its really hard to know what to do in the moment, and its easy to beat yourself up about it later.
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Old 09-18-2012, 01:35 PM   #25
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Re: How would you have reacted?

At first, I would have let the mother deal with it. But by the time any initial hitting or pinching happened, I would have grabbed the child by the arm, put my finger in his face and told him 'no no no, we do not hit!' and then sent him to his mother. If he then came near me and my child again, I would have given him my very angry momma look to back off. If that didn't deter him, I would have taken him to his mother and then left the store.

My child is bullied all the time. I have no problem asserting myself as her advocate. Just yesterday at the park, some child was intentionally not allowing her up the last climb of the playscape, he was swinging on the bar above and sorta gently kicking her facial area. I first waited for him to move, then when I realized that he was doing it on purpose, I went and moved him and told him that his behavior was unnacceptable. and that was the end of it. He didn't like some mom that wasn't his telling him what to do and he left the area.

ETA: oh and if any parent out there wants to get up in my face about touching their child after their child is hitting, pinching, pushing, kicking my child - I dare them. Take care of your kid or I will do it for you. If you don't like it, you need to be better about doing it yourself.
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Old 09-18-2012, 03:10 PM   #26
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Re: How would you have reacted?

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At first, I would have let the mother deal with it. But by the time any initial hitting or pinching happened, I would have grabbed the child by the arm, put my finger in his face and told him 'no no no, we do not hit!' and then sent him to his mother. If he then came near me and my child again, I would have given him my very angry momma look to back off. If that didn't deter him, I would have taken him to his mother and then left the store.

My child is bullied all the time. I have no problem asserting myself as her advocate. Just yesterday at the park, some child was intentionally not allowing her up the last climb of the playscape, he was swinging on the bar above and sorta gently kicking her facial area. I first waited for him to move, then when I realized that he was doing it on purpose, I went and moved him and told him that his behavior was unnacceptable. and that was the end of it. He didn't like some mom that wasn't his telling him what to do and he left the area.

ETA: oh and if any parent out there wants to get up in my face about touching their child after their child is hitting, pinching, pushing, kicking my child - I dare them. Take care of your kid or I will do it for you. If you don't like it, you need to be better about doing it yourself.
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Old 09-18-2012, 10:01 PM   #27
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Re: How would you have reacted?

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Originally Posted by EmilytheStrange View Post

ETA: oh and if any parent out there wants to get up in my face about touching their child after their child is hitting, pinching, pushing, kicking my child - I dare them. Take care of your kid or I will do it for you. If you don't like it, you need to be better about doing it yourself.
I still don't think you should ever put your hands on another child. That could cause a lot of problems for you. I understand the frustration when it's your child being bullied but I can't really think of a situation where placing your hands on another child is ok If your child is being sat on? But moving a child out of the way because he/she is being a brat ... I don't know.
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Old 09-18-2012, 10:41 PM   #28
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I still don't think you should ever put your hands on another child. That could cause a lot of problems for you. I understand the frustration when it's your child being bullied but I can't really think of a situation where placing your hands on another child is ok If your child is being sat on? But moving a child out of the way because he/she is being a brat ... I don't know.
So if a child was physically hurting your child and the mother was standing by doing nothing you wouldn't physically remove the child from your own?

What about a 10 year old that has your child pinned to the ground hitting yours in the face? You still don't want to touch the other child?! Really? How long would you let it continue? What would be your plans of stopping it?

I just don't understand your thinking. It's never ok to touch another child?
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Old 09-19-2012, 01:24 AM   #29
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So if a child was physically hurting your child and the mother was standing by doing nothing you wouldn't physically remove the child from your own?

What about a 10 year old that has your child pinned to the ground hitting yours in the face? You still don't want to touch the other child?! Really? How long would you let it continue? What would be your plans of stopping it?

I just don't understand your thinking. It's never ok to touch another child?
I said if my child was being sat on and the only thing to do is touch the other child to remove them, that was the only time I could think it would be ok.

How long do I let my child get beat on?! The time it takes me to walk next to him/her and remove them from the situation!

Plans to stop it? I remove my child and touch only my child. I speak to the parent directly or leave the environment.

My not saying allow your children to be beat on to avoid touching someone else's kid. Not at all! I'm saying touching someone else's child when you easily don't have to to stop to the behavior COULD cause problems for you. That's all.

Think about it.... Place yourself in the other moms shoes. Imagine your child is pretending to kick another child's face (kicking the air) like the other mama's post said. And for a moment you aren't paying attention for whatever reason, your toddler just fell and scrapped her knee or you were helping a little one go down the slide. For that spilt second you weren't watching a stranger picked up your child and moved them. That wouldn't make you angry? I was literally assaulted as a child when someone picked me up, slipped a finger in and then let me down. A few seconds was all it took in a crowded area. I would FLIP if anyone touched DD.
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Old 09-19-2012, 01:51 AM   #30
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Re: How would you have reacted?

I would have asked the other child to please not hit my child. If he continued I would have taken my child away from the situation. It's my job to protect my child, it is NOT my job to discipline a stranger's child, no matter if their parent is doing it or not.
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