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Old 09-21-2012, 08:57 AM   #11
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Re: Basically it's Friday!

I need to clarify something for you Cheryl just because it will make me feel better that you are directing you anger in the best manner

My training that is this three days I will provide a brutally honest evaluation.

Now starting on Monday is my 3 day audit from that state...totally different from these 3 days of dumb training. And I just found out I am on the list of people that will be interviewed so you can count on my being honest about this system and the students lives.

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Old 09-21-2012, 09:00 AM   #12
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Re: Basically it's Friday!

That makes me feel lots better Jen. I'm glad they value your input!
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Old 09-21-2012, 09:10 AM   #13
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Re: Basically it's Friday!

Yo. Muffins made, dishes mostly washed, shower taken. Now to get Lydia cleaned up and go to town, deliver said muffins, and take Lydia to her meeting. DH wants to go with and then go to Milbank to go to Runnings for some reason. I wish he felt comfortable taking Lydia and letting me stay here to pick up. I've had a head ache all day and am really not in the mood to run errands and go out to lunch.
Cheryl, I think middle kids are wired to react more dramatically emotionally... Mari is all highs or lows, never just in the middle. Or when she is in the middle and I am enjoying it she suddenly realizes and reacts to some unseen trigger as either the worst or best thing in the world. I think it is ok that the rose wasn't accepted. I would worry she would start to think that she could negate the problem that she caused with gifts. I always tell the girls that they need to back up their words (apologies) with their actions. That just saying that they are sorry will not prove to anyone that they were sincere and they need to rebuild the trust that was lost.
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Old 09-21-2012, 09:20 AM   #14
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Re: Basically it's Friday!

Oh wow Cheryl.

I feel your pain....and am living it here with Derry daily. Only I get respite from the behaviour because of her meds. But off them Derry is just the same as Ginger.

IDK if you want to look into getting her evaluated again....but it might be worth looking into. You're in a different area and the doctors might just see more now she's older.

We're on to the next level of getting Derry evaluated. Her psychiatrist wanted her seen to get further testing done because of her behaviour that was outside of regular ADHD behaviour. We've always seen this behaviour for Derry but it's different now others see it too.
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Old 09-21-2012, 09:24 AM   #15
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Yeah, Jess, I've had two teachers tell me this is common with middle children. I've also had two docs tell me it is common with gifted children. IDK, I think if you have multiple children you are bound to have one that is wired this way. Simple math, LOL. And I did think about the gifts thing, I did address that when we talked about giving her the rose and that the important thing was to be extra nice and patient with the girl since SHE was the one that hurt her. When we do this when she wrongs her siblings or the neighbor girl it is a lot easier to come up with things she can do to make it up to them that are not actual gifts, with a stranger I haven't met and Ginger doesn't know well it's a little more difficult.

It's also me trying to do damage control for Rosie. It's not easy being the sister of the kid that has trouble fitting in or causes problems, and she's at the age where siblings and parents are embarassing. And I told the story how this school does not have a cafeteria, but they are allowed to invite people from other classes to eat in their classroom with them. Evidently Ginger invited one of Rosie's classmates, and I don't even know if she knows her, and the girl turned her down (again, probably because she doesn't even know her, LOL). At this point anything to get Ginger some cool points/street cred would be helpful.
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Old 09-21-2012, 09:33 AM   #16
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You know, I talked to another psychiatrist about it, and they don't feel she's on the autism spectrum AT ALL (I was/am still concerned about Asperger's) but that she will grow out of it with the proper guidance. And when I talked to Ginger's teacher earlier in the week at the conference, she seemed to have the same opinion, that while it is more on the far end of spectrum of what 2nd grade kids do, she does understand when she is wrong and she has seen small improvements over time. That it will just take her longer to "get it" than the other kids.

Case in point, yesterday I watched her listen to a bible story at church, and she of course raised her hand, waved it wildly until she was recognized, and brought up some random comment that only minimally related to the story. Today in storytime, several kids did this, or just flat-out interrupted, or tried to tell long involved stories while I was reading, but Ginger behaved beautifully and only interjected once, when appropriate and after being recognized. Because she knows she can't get away with anything less with me. I think sadly she just pushes her boundaries with every teacher just to see what she can get away with, then once she finds out, she stays within the limits she can not get in trouble with.
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Old 09-21-2012, 09:42 AM   #17
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Work was good.

Although yesterday I got a call (we several calls from a private number) from work. I called back and found out it was the one person who I'm sure doesn't like me wanting to know where I'd put a new item in the freezer. Silly really because it was right where it's meant to be. If she'd just looked in the plan she'd have seen where it's meant to be and found it.

Anyway when I got to work today I saw her and told her that I'm happy to answer any questions but if they call and I don't answer they really should please just leave a quick message. I have answer machines on both my cell and home phone so I'm always reachable. The work phone says private number when they dial out. I cant call back if I dont have a number and I cant phone around asking everywhere that might have called me to see if they called. She said she would.

So I got on with my work. Doing as I do any other day. Walked around. Tidied up the freezers in the shop and then went out to the back to the storage freezer to get the stuff so I can start my working day.

Did my job and sorted out any mess that other workers/customers did when I wasn't there.....I've come to the conclusion it's pointless saying anything or expecting others to do my job as well as me. I just fix any messes as I find them, as I'm putting things away I'll fix anything to the left and right of what I'm putting away too.

I make sure I put the plastic in the right place, I put away all the boxes from my working, and food that is damaged and any fresh food that's been dumped in the freezer is written off and destroyed.

One of our co-workers is leaving today to go and work back in the shop she trained in. She isn't getting enough training opportunities in our shop. There are too many training at the same time and their just isn't enough for all of them to train on. So she made some flippant remark about how now she and one other worker are gone the best have now left.

I told her to see it as one door closing but another opening. She whispered later that she didn't mean it badly. But that she's a bit overwhelmed at how quickly the move is happening for her.


I said that it's ok, I'm happy for her...she should do everything she can to see that she get on in her career. She's young and has her whole future ahead of her. She's got to work hard to make more of herself. She has opportunities that I don't have and she needs to push forward and make something of herself. I don't have that chance any more but I still love my job; and I do! I really get a sense of satisfaction in a job well done.....no matter what it is.

My boss made a point of coming to me today and saying he's really pleased with my freezer sand how I've been working. I was thrilled
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Old 09-21-2012, 09:50 AM   #18
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Re: Basically it's Friday!

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Originally Posted by cherylchoo View Post
You know, I talked to another psychiatrist about it, and they don't feel she's on the autism spectrum AT ALL (I was/am still concerned about Asperger's) but that she will grow out of it with the proper guidance. And when I talked to Ginger's teacher earlier in the week at the conference, she seemed to have the same opinion, that while it is more on the far end of spectrum of what 2nd grade kids do, she does understand when she is wrong and she has seen small improvements over time. That it will just take her longer to "get it" than the other kids.

Case in point, yesterday I watched her listen to a bible story at church, and she of course raised her hand, waved it wildly until she was recognized, and brought up some random comment that only minimally related to the story. Today in storytime, several kids did this, or just flat-out interrupted, or tried to tell long involved stories while I was reading, but Ginger behaved beautifully and only interjected once, when appropriate and after being recognized. Because she knows she can't get away with anything less with me. I think sadly she just pushes her boundaries with every teacher just to see what she can get away with, then once she finds out, she stays within the limits she can not get in trouble with.
She is still young and has time. I know you know what to look out for so I'm sure you'd see sooner than anyone if she really did need more help.

Aspergers is what we're worried about with Derry too.
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Old 09-21-2012, 10:12 AM   #19
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Re: Basically it's Friday!

Yeah, the problem with Aspergers is it is really hard to diagnose in children, and girls in particular. There is evidence to suggest maybe it really isn't more common in males, it is just harder to diagnose in girls. So if she is still having issues after a year or so, I am going to probe about getting her evaluated again. Right now everyone is of the opinion no, and that just the change of moving/new schools could be driving a lot of the behavior. So until that isn't a factor anymore it's hard to argue otherwise.

I am so glad that you have a good work situation Janine. I envy you. I have been slowly looking at different ways to get back into the workforce here, and it is bleak. Jobs period are just really hard to come by here. I was hoping to get a night shift job stocking or doing custodial stuff a couple nights a week for a major company of some kind. You know, to get some kind of work history going, and then maybe try for a transfer to a different kind of job when all the kids were in school full time. But those jobs are few and far between here. Honestly the only way I could work night hours here would be homecare for seniors, because that is always a great need where I live. So I am contemplating that now.
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Old 09-21-2012, 10:51 AM   #20
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OMG I am so tired. I don't know what's wrong with me. I think I must be coming down with something, IDK.

I went to Old Navy yesterday, and they are having a pretty good sale right now. They have toddler boy jersey pants for $5, sweatpants for $8, chinos for $12. And those colored jeans/twills/cords for women are $19 right now. I don't dare try them on, but I love to covet them, LOL. I didn't look at the girls' stuff, because they don't need anything and I don't want to be tempted.

Rosie is pretty attached to a couple pairs of jeans that are too short for her. Do you think it would be uncool to add a ruffle to the bottom at 3rd grade/8YO? Maybe black lace or something? I would just buy her replacements, but right now the only ones that fit her properly are plain, and she likes the embellishments on her old ones. And they are not embellishments I could add.
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