Reply Hey Mom! Learn more about the Gerber Life Insurance Grow-Up Plan!
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 09-21-2012, 01:29 PM   #1
Kiliki's Avatar
Kiliki
Registered Users
Formerly: kr***y
seller
 
Join Date: Jun 2007
Posts: 9,397
CLEAN YOUR ROOM! I'm so mean...

I'm so irritated with my 5.5 /o right now. She KNOWS how to clean her room. I don't expect it to be perfect. I DO expect her to put her toys back in her toy box and pull up the covers on her bed.

I have tried EVERYTHING. She can clean it up easily. The issue is she won't. I've battling with her for most of the day. Her and her younger brother went and made a HUGE mess playing earlier today. I reminded them more than once - "You're going to have to clean that up later!"

Well, now it's time to clean up (and has been for a while) and I send them both in (after all, even though it's her room, they BOTH made the mess), they clean for 10 mins, then they play. I remind them to clean. 10 mins cleaning, back to playing. And on and on.

I've had to take toys in the past over this. And I told her she will lose any toys on the floor after the timer goes off... they've had AMPLE time now - over and HOUR, and I set the timer to 25 mins. I'm being TOTALLY reasonable. It would take them less than 10 mins to toss everything in the toy box.

I'm listening to them playing right now. And I'm SO frustrated.

I'm really sad she is going to lose her toys. I know she can clean her room, she CAN - I've seen her do it. She just refuses.

Thankfully 90% of her toys are just junk anyway, and we planned on getting her new stuff soon to replace her old junky toys. But still, I was hoping for a nicer way for her to part with her old toys than having them all taken away at once.

Oh well, she will still have the toys in the living room, I guess.

I hate being a mean mom. But I also know what a huge disservice it was to me that my mom never REQUIRED me to clean up my room and keep it clean regularly. I really want her to learn this. And I know she is capable.

Sometimes being a parent is hard. Stupid pregnancy hormones.

Advertisement

Kiliki is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-21-2012, 01:57 PM   #2
EmilytheStrange's Avatar
EmilytheStrange
Registered Users
 
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: Mountain Home, ID
Posts: 7,418
My Mood:
Re: CLEAN YOUR ROOM! I'm so mean...

I don't think you're the mean mom. Grab a bag, take the toys.

they will learn.
__________________
SAHM to Magnolia May (09/10) and Luke Russett (04/13) and wife and best friend to my airman.
EmilytheStrange is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-21-2012, 02:07 PM   #3
Kiliki's Avatar
Kiliki
Registered Users
Formerly: kr***y
seller
 
Join Date: Jun 2007
Posts: 9,397
Re: CLEAN YOUR ROOM! I'm so mean...

Quote:
Originally Posted by EmilytheStrange View Post
I don't think you're the mean mom. Grab a bag, take the toys.

they will learn.
Thanks

I ended up leaving her favorite beloved stuffed animal and I put most of her clothes in her hamper. But everything else that was on the floor went in the garbage bag and to the garbage can.

It was mostly old McDonald's toys, or other random junky toys that should have never been brought into the house anyway.

She cried and screamed. I wanted to cry too. But I said I'd do it and I did it. I gave plenty of time, plenty of warning. I let her have her fit in her room and shut the door when she wouldn't stop screaming. She's quiet now. I assume she's sleeping.

Ugh. I know it's the right thing to do. But sometimes it's hard to be a good mom.
Kiliki is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-21-2012, 02:33 PM   #4
coquelicot's Avatar
coquelicot
Registered Users
seller
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Tennessee
Posts: 1,403
My Mood:
Re: CLEAN YOUR ROOM! I'm so mean...

Something I've tried lately that's had good results--can you make it a race with a stopwatch instead of a deadline with a timer? My phone has a stopwatch option within the clock app. I tell my 4-year-old DD that we're going to see how fast she can clean up, and see if she can beat that time next time.

If that doesn't work, something else we've done--get the vacuum out and say that any toys left on the floor after xx amount of minutes will be sucked up by the vacuum. This only works if your kids don't realize that the toys are too big for the vacuum. This typically would get DD to pick up her toys.

But if it takes removing toys for your DD to get the hint, so be it.
__________________
K & B since 10/2003
Added our sweet little C 4/2008 and our baby boy I 12/2012
coquelicot is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-21-2012, 02:33 PM   #5
my2sweets's Avatar
my2sweets
Registered Users
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Texas
Posts: 4,910
My Mood:
I bet she picks her toys up next time
__________________
House Goddess & mama to 8 yr old princess L , 6 yr old mama magnet J and 9mos old love bug C

Swagbucks. Search. Earn. Redeem. Yep, it's that simple (I've earned $70 in gift cards and counting!).
my2sweets is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-21-2012, 02:39 PM   #6
Kiliki's Avatar
Kiliki
Registered Users
Formerly: kr***y
seller
 
Join Date: Jun 2007
Posts: 9,397
Re: CLEAN YOUR ROOM! I'm so mean...

Quote:
Originally Posted by coquelicot View Post
Something I've tried lately that's had good results--can you make it a race with a stopwatch instead of a deadline with a timer? My phone has a stopwatch option within the clock app. I tell my 4-year-old DD that we're going to see how fast she can clean up, and see if she can beat that time next time.

If that doesn't work, something else we've done--get the vacuum out and say that any toys left on the floor after xx amount of minutes will be sucked up by the vacuum. This only works if your kids don't realize that the toys are too big for the vacuum. This typically would get DD to pick up her toys.

But if it takes removing toys for your DD to get the hint, so be it.
I've tried both of those. They think the timer thing is hilarious and run around like zoo animals.

And my DD is way too much of a smarty pants to let me get away with the vacuum idea. Case in point - once she was acting up, and I said "If you keep acting that way, I can't let you turn 5. Five year olds can't act that way." (Man I thought that was so good!) She looked at me, then thought, then said, "Mama, how are you going to stop me from turning five? You can't do that, can you?" "No, honey, I was only bluffing." .... "mama, what's bluffing?" ROFL
Kiliki is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-21-2012, 03:22 PM   #7
lolson3's Avatar
lolson3
Registered Users
seller
seller
 
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Arizona
Posts: 507
Re: CLEAN YOUR ROOM! I'm so mean...

Anytime my kids start complaining about cleaning up I just ask them if they want me to clean them up. They immediately say "NOOOOO!" Because they know if I clean it up it will go into timeout where they have to earn it back. If it is just junk, then I would donate it/ throw it away. Or sometimes I say, "Feel free to clean up the toys you want to keep." If there are toys that no one wants to play with and they get brought out so they can find the toys they really want to play with, then why keep them? DD (5.5yo) is to the point that she doesn't want more toys because that means more toys to clean up.
__________________
Laurel, SAHM to S 2/07 D 7/09 E 2/11 and I 2/13
lolson3 is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 09-21-2012, 03:31 PM   #8
chello's Avatar
chello
Registered Users
seller
 
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: Saskatchewan girl
Posts: 2,039
My Mood:
Re: CLEAN YOUR ROOM! I'm so mean...

Yesterday DD1 and DS1 made a huge mess in their rooms. I told them to clean it up (they're 5 and 3 and perfectly capable) and they didn't. dun dun DUUUUNNNNN! so we set a timer and said if it wasn't cleaned up they didn't get dessert. We had company last night which always means a good dessert those rooms were cleaned in record time!
__________________
4 in 5 years, what were we thinking? July 07, April 09, Nov 10, and August 12
chello is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-21-2012, 03:32 PM   #9
Kiliki's Avatar
Kiliki
Registered Users
Formerly: kr***y
seller
 
Join Date: Jun 2007
Posts: 9,397
Re: CLEAN YOUR ROOM! I'm so mean...

Quote:
Originally Posted by chello View Post
Yesterday DD1 and DS1 made a huge mess in their rooms. I told them to clean it up (they're 5 and 3 and perfectly capable) and they didn't. dun dun DUUUUNNNNN! so we set a timer and said if it wasn't cleaned up they didn't get dessert. We had company last night which always means a good dessert those rooms were cleaned in record time!
Yea... I took away dessert first. Then the toys.

Today I guess they were just on a cleaning strike.
Kiliki is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-21-2012, 04:25 PM   #10
GEM Cloth's Avatar
GEM Cloth
Registered Users
Formerly: michellemomx3
seller
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Arkansas
Posts: 11,953
My Mood:
Re: CLEAN YOUR ROOM! I'm so mean...

It's gonna be okay, mama. My 5.5yo son doesn't even have a bedroom.
__________________
Michelle, mom to DD (7/9/99), DD (11/12/01), and DS (4/17/07); wife to DH (8/31/96)
GEM (Green and Economical by Michelle) Cloth
~*~ REUSABLE CLOTH PAD SETS ~ BUDGET-FRIENDLY PRICES ~ WORLDWIDE SHIPPING ~*~
GEM Cloth is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump

Copyright 2005 - 2014 Escalate Media. All Rights Reserved.