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Old 09-29-2012, 06:38 AM   #111
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Re: Lil Shamrocks - Week of Sept 24

you can't say (p)orn on ds? REALLY?

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Old 09-29-2012, 07:37 AM   #112
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It will not be in his favor that he up and LEFT his entire family and just didn't come back. Make sure you document everything from this point forward. Phone calls, dates, times, what was specifically said, etc. It will help you in the long run. See if you can get the (p)orn records/payment info too. Sadly, I went through all this last year (separated for 10 mos). DH and I went to a lot of counseling and ended up working things out and were able to really let go of the past. He said some pretty nasty, hurtful things to me so I know how that goes. Will be praying for strength for you!

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Old 09-29-2012, 09:51 AM   #113
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Re: Lil Shamrocks - Week of Sept 24

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Thanks i can use all the prayers i can get.
I can't even imagine a homebirth alone. Jake was so high needs idk how i'm goign to handle a toddler and a newborn. he still gets up 4-5 times a night.
i only have two good friends that live here and they have lives so they're doing what they can but its really really hard.
i lost 9lbs and have been trying to eat but can't. Today i vommited all morning.
my heart is literally ripped out.
This is all so he can avoid responsibility of life and continue to use his internet ****, to the tune of thousands of dollars monthly. He lives in a fantasy and his family allows it. When life gets tough, he checks out. Praying he realizes HE is the one that will be lonely and sad int he long run.
thinks he's getting 50/50 of the kids and wil ship them to TN. I have a lawyer on thurs to consult.
Honestly I would tell him to lawyer up because not only is he not getting anything with that addiction but you will OWN him until the baby in your belly is 18. I watched my parents go through a nasty divorce and I got tossed around a lot, I can tell you from experience it is better to have the children with one parent full time. That was when I was the most happy. I can also say that counseling for you and the children is worth it's weight in gold. I think that is why we are all so well adjusted today.
I am so sorry you are going through this but I agree with the post below, keep a record of EVERYTHING, I would even tape phone calls. Find those p**n records to use in your case. Write everything down, when he left, when he called wanting a divorce, etc. I know it is super hard but finding that primal mama bear inside of you will help you fight on, get mad instead of sick. We are all here sending you good vibes and prayers.

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It will not be in his favor that he up and LEFT his entire family and just didn't come back. Make sure you document everything from this point forward. Phone calls, dates, times, what was specifically said, etc. It will help you in the long run. See if you can get the (p)orn records/payment info too. Sadly, I went through all this last year (separated for 10 mos). DH and I went to a lot of counseling and ended up working things out and were able to really let go of the past. He said some pretty nasty, hurtful things to me so I know how that goes. Will be praying for strength for you!
I am so glad it worked out for you in the end, just goes to show that healing can happen even in hard situations. Counseling can really help. You must be a STRONG woman!
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Old 09-29-2012, 11:27 AM   #114
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Re: Lil Shamrocks - Week of Sept 24

So sorry about your situation Stephanie, I'll be praying for strength for you and your kids!
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Old 09-29-2012, 12:55 PM   #115
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Re: Lil Shamrocks - Week of Sept 24

i pray he can come around/ do the right thing, but his famly/ addiction has SUCH a strong hold on him. all i can do is vomit and pray. lost 10lbs. trying to eat even a bite here and there. my 8yr isn't sad. she's more sad at the possiblity of moving, she loves this house/ her bffl lives next door. jake keeps asking constant for daddy but is so little he doesn't really know much.

He opened a new bank acct in TN, and i got the mail today. He also promised not to touch our bank account, i still opened my own/ transferred all but 238.00 to it, and he pulled out the last 200 today from an ATM. IDk what i'm going to do when he shows up demanding it.

Also found his 9mm next to my bed WITH THE CLIP/ box of bullets just in the drawer. I put it in a case/ hid it. I'm not going to be no murder victim.

Trace, i hope that will be the story for us because i do love him, he's just very very sick. Idk if he'll ever wake up. esp after all this business 'moving on'
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Old 09-29-2012, 06:30 PM   #116
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Re: Lil Shamrocks - Week of Sept 24

Stephanie....you are freaking me out with the mention of the 9mm....do you have any reason to think he might try to hurt you?? Sometimes people get a gut feeling about things like this....please be careful and if you have ANY reason to think your life may be in danger, please make a plan to get out of there ASAP and reach out for help! Please feel free to PM me if you don't want to post everything on DS....before I had kids I worked in the social work field and worked with people in domestic violence situations....I don't know everything, but could certainly try to help you figure out where to start with getting help if you are in danger.

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Old 09-29-2012, 07:03 PM   #117
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So sorry to hear about your dh, Stephanie! ((HUGS)) Definitely talk to your attorney about what you can do to keep your family safe, physically and financially.
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Old 09-29-2012, 10:14 PM   #118
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Re: Lil Shamrocks - Week of Sept 24

I agree with happymama1, if that thought even entered your head you need to protect yourself. Change the locks.
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Old 09-30-2012, 09:37 AM   #119
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Re: Lil Shamrocks - Week of Sept 24

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I agree with happymama1, if that thought even entered your head you need to protect yourself. Change the locks.
I agree. Better safe than anything. Also, that way you can make sure that he doesn't come in while you are out and take things that maybe you need to discuss. You can always give him the new keys if things work out (and I hope that they do). Still sending lots of prayers your way. I cannot imagine how hard this is for you, but know that you have a wonderful group here around you that will support you however is needed.
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Old 09-30-2012, 10:46 AM   #120
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Re: Lil Shamrocks - Week of Sept 24

Thanks, i hid the gun, he'll have no clue where it is. There is nothing i cannot replace except my children. he can take what he pleases.

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