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Old 10-02-2012, 06:57 AM   #41
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Re: Even when you save you just can't win

That girl is BOLD, and his family needs to get over their entitled selves.

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Old 10-02-2012, 07:06 AM   #42
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Re: Even when you save you just can't win

Quote:
Originally Posted by keonli View Post
Mini update:

10/02/12
Well, we finally got a new (to us) vehicle over the weekend. We traveled out of state to get a better deal and DH texted his sister and let her know that we found a vehicle and were willing to GIVE her our old Honda Accord. (The dealership actually offered us only $100 to trade in our car!!!)

We let her know that the mileage was high and that the transmission had issues, but that the car was perfectly drivable and had been able to make it over 100 miles a day for the past few years without ever breaking down. We even said we were willing to stick with the old car but it was a 6 cylinder and cost too much in gas expenses, but since she didn't drive far, she could definitely have it. We let her know that the car was due to be reregistered in another 2 weeks so she'd have to go pay for that, as well as what the state would tax the car at when she did the paperwork.

SHE REFUSED US. She said she didn't want to put any money into a car that wouldn't last (no one ever said it wouldn't last...) and that she would rather have us sell it and give that money to her.

DH had a moment of stealthy silence. Then he said "If you don't want the car and don't want to bother selling it yourself, then I'll keep it and profit from it for me and my family." He really emphasized MY FAMILY so she knew that he meant his own kids and his wife, and not his siblings.

He later on said that he did feel bad but he knows that it isn't his responsibility to provide for his siblings or his parents anymore.

Self-entitlement much, in laws????
Wow. Just wow. Like I said upthread, we've been given cars, and if I was in a position where I didn't have a working car, and someone gave me one, even one that wasn't in the best shape as a stopgap until I could afford a better one I'd be grateful. Girl has issues, and I'm proud of your DH for sticking up for himself.
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Old 10-02-2012, 07:06 AM   #43
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Oh good gravy. Entitlement issues for sure. Wouldnt even sell it herself? So glad dh told her to stick it. What an ungrateful brat.

Is it to much to hope for that she doesnt go whining to mom and dad and yall get an earful?
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Old 10-02-2012, 07:47 AM   #44
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Re: Even when you save you just can't win

computermama, I didn't get to read your response yet. Just got into work and logged on with the update. I'll read it now. It's hard to believe that people who act like this are so prevalent in the world!

My MIL is a quiet person and won't say much to us. My FIL might say something but he and DH do not get along, so most likely we'll be talked and whispered about behind our backs. DH and I have agreed to not discuss anything concerning finances about our new to us car.

ETA: I sympathize with you completely. We are working hard on what is really a modest income in our area. I have also had the pleasure (said sarcastically) of trying to make ends meet with a husband who has an unpredictable gambling habit. But we have made it work because we are willing to sacrifice and save. We appreciate any help we get and are grateful for it...but it seems like not everyone agrees with us on this.

Last edited by keonli; 10-02-2012 at 07:55 AM.
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Old 10-02-2012, 08:01 AM   #45
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Wow. You can sell it and give the money to me?! Who the hell says that? My grandma bought my first nice car for me. I was working to pay her back but after a couple months she refused the money and said just to keep it. I was 18 at the time and my parents never really helped me out so my grandma was like a second mom to me growing up. I have borrowed money from her recently but always paid her back. Most of the other grandkids don't pay her back because they feel entitled to it which really ticks me off. I would never even be upset if she refused to loan me money because it isn't mine to begin with.

I'm glad your husband told his sister. I would be livid if my sil said something like that.

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Old 10-02-2012, 08:06 AM   #46
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Your sister in law hurts my brain. My SIL had given my husband a few items when she was moving that she was gonna put in the dump. We put it In a spare room and it was great for filling furniture. Well dec our house burnt down by march she was asking for the money that the insurance was going to give us for it... We barely got any money from the insurance for our stuff... Let alone having to buy everything all over again. My husband just ignored it but seriously. Not to go poor us but our house burnt down. We got a new house sure but we still had to fill it with stuff and restart our lives from scratch. It was an extremely stressful time for us.0 plus the insurance didn't give us any money for 6 months as they were slow so we were living on credit cards. I was off on sick leave. My MIL even said well you guys got like 60,000 cheque I'm like um no. You live in lala land. They only give you what they guess the value of your stuff was and it was a huge battle cause they kept saying all our stuff was super old valuing beds at nothing. Plus when you start from scratch it costs a lot. Clothes and beds appliances and baby gear as I was pregnant with our second. Pictures for the walls even curtains and lost food!!!! It adds up.

Sell your car. Keep the profit.
Tell the spoiled brat to figure her own ride with her own money.

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Old 10-02-2012, 08:39 AM   #47
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Quote:
Originally Posted by keonli
Mini update:

10/02/12
Well, we finally got a new (to us) vehicle over the weekend. We traveled out of state to get a better deal and DH texted his sister and let her know that we found a vehicle and were willing to GIVE her our old Honda Accord. (The dealership actually offered us only $100 to trade in our car!!!)

We let her know that the mileage was high and that the transmission had issues, but that the car was perfectly drivable and had been able to make it over 100 miles a day for the past few years without ever breaking down. We even said we were willing to stick with the old car but it was a 6 cylinder and cost too much in gas expenses, but since she didn't drive far, she could definitely have it. We let her know that the car was due to be reregistered in another 2 weeks so she'd have to go pay for that, as well as what the state would tax the car at when she did the paperwork.

SHE REFUSED US. She said she didn't want to put any money into a car that wouldn't last (no one ever said it wouldn't last...) and that she would rather have us sell it and give that money to her.

DH had a moment of stealthy silence. Then he said "If you don't want the car and don't want to bother selling it yourself, then I'll keep it and profit from it for me and my family." He really emphasized MY FAMILY so she knew that he meant his own kids and his wife, and not his siblings.

He later on said that he did feel bad but he knows that it isn't his responsibility to provide for his siblings or his parents anymore.

Self-entitlement much, in laws????
Wow...just wow. And way to go to your DH! That girl has a lot of growing up to do, and lessons to learn.

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Old 10-02-2012, 03:47 PM   #48
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Wow. I am sorry you have to deal with inlaws like that.
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Old 10-02-2012, 05:11 PM   #49
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Re: Even when you save you just can't win

What? Maybe he should tell them that it would be good for her credit to get a loan and make payments. If she ever expects to be able to buy a house one day, she needs to establish a good line of credit and have credit history. If he words it that way maybe it would give things a positive spin? Like he's trying to look out for her in the long run? Just trying to come up with some ideas for you! Really, my opinion is even giving her one of your old cars would be INCREDIBLY generous. No one has ever given me a car!!
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Old 10-06-2012, 08:04 AM   #50
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Holy cow. She's nuts. Seriously crazy. Good for you guys for putting your foot down!
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