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Old 10-06-2012, 12:16 PM   #11
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Re: Frustrated with DH

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Old 10-06-2012, 01:42 PM   #12
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Re: Frustrated with DH

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My husband is mostly still that way but I'm working on him.
I told him as long as all the dirty laundry made it down the laundry shute that I'd do wash it all, dry it and put it away. The key word was "get it downstairs." If I find anything of his that he hasn't put away then I just chuck it into the bottom of his closet. It took him a week to figure out why he had no clean socks and pants, and about 30 minutes of searching the house to find them.
I do this. Anything IN the laundry gets washed, including belts, money, ID books etc. Anything NOT in the laundry gets shoved in the bottom of his cupboard. Anything lying around gets one week and is then trashed. He is learning in some areas. Others, he sucks.

I must say, as "problems" go. I would take this one over most. Its mostly frustrating rather then unhappy making.
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Old 10-06-2012, 09:22 PM   #13
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Re: Frustrated with DH

I do most of the cleaning over here. DH makes a huge mess when trying to do anything that involves water (dishes, laundry, mopping, etc.) and when he cooks he makes a huge mess that I will have to clean up so I don't have to clean up the mess from him trying to do the dishes. He will hardly ever put his clothes in the hamper and i'm always picking them up. He leaves cadny wrappes, pop cans, and etc. laying around as well. He doesn't even bother trying to sweep, cleaning up the dog's accidents, or taking care of the litter pan. If I remind him he'll take care of our recycling & trash (but not the bathroom trash) but he hardly ever does it without prodding. I'm also a neat freak and everything in the house has a specific place and he'll get something out and not put it back. I'm used to it now after 3 years of marriage but it used to drive me crazy.
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Old 10-06-2012, 09:46 PM   #14
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So excuse me if I happen to not wash ALL of your work clothes and you don't have anything to wear. Get off your a$$ and do something for yourself. I take care of 4 (soon to be 5) other people by myself. Thanks.
Amen!! I just started this policy. If your clothes are laying all over the floor, they won't get cleaned. If they're in the hamper they will. I'm not your mother or your housekeeper! Sheesh!!

Hugs mamas, and keep up the good work!

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Old 10-06-2012, 09:50 PM   #15
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Re: Frustrated with DH

My DH is somewhat clutter blind and I do most of the work. I would be irritated about him leaving a huge mess in the kitchen (for me to clean!) but the other stuff I kind of think, "don't sweat the small stuff" to me how he pulls the handle on the toilet or if he puts his clothes next to the bed would be small stuff.
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Old 10-06-2012, 11:40 PM   #16
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Re: Frustrated with DH

I do all house work here. Its an agreement between us. He pays for everything. I clean. What I don't like is him treating me like a maid. Finished with a soda can. Take it to the kitchen and throw it in recycling. Finished with a glass. Leave it where it is and I deal with it.

Its weird that a can and a glass are different to me, but they are. One is trash the other is cleaning.

I don't appreciate shoes left in the lounge. That is lazy. I don't do clothes left on the floor, that is disrespectful. So the long and short for me is, I have a job to do in this house. Its not an easy job. Don't come home and make it more difficult for me. I don't go into your office and trash it. Don't come into mine and trash it.

Day to day use of the house I will clean with a smile. Any more then that, I feel disrespected.
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Old 10-06-2012, 11:56 PM   #17
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Re: Frustrated with DH

I don't do my DH's laundry anymore, he's responsible for his own. I got ticked off after having gum or chapstick ruin my clothes one too many times. We got into an argument because he thought that I should be checking his pockets before throwing his clothes in the wash. Seriously? Even the kids know to take all their loot out of their pockets before throwing it in the hamper. Since then he's washed and effectively destroyed two cell phones, but has no one to blame but himself.

He's also the "dishwasher" in our house. He used to dirty almost every single cup and plate in our house on a daily basis (and we don't have an automatic dishwasher) so I stopped washing dishes for a couple days (the kids and I used paper products) and he finally had to wash them himself in order to have glassware to take his lunch to work. Since then he's taken on the dish responsibility completely. I absolutely hate washing dishes, so we've compromised. He does the dishes, yard work/snow shoveling, and his own laundry, and I do everything else around the house. It actually works out pretty well, because there are some things I really wouldn't want him doing.
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Old 10-07-2012, 02:11 AM   #18
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Haha, I must be the odd one out! I am the lazy one that doesn't want to clean in our house. Sometimes we will just both be lazy all week and I get feed up with the mess and will go on a cleaning kick though. But to be honest as long as there isn't food sitting out and our house isn't completely disgusting I don't see a need to make it spotless. We have a toddler and are expecting in March and our home will always have the lived in look as opposed to the spotless look. And I am perfectly happy with that!
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Old 10-07-2012, 09:33 AM   #19
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Re: Frustrated with DH

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Haha, I must be the odd one out! I am the lazy one that doesn't want to clean in our house. Sometimes we will just both be lazy all week and I get feed up with the mess and will go on a cleaning kick though. But to be honest as long as there isn't food sitting out and our house isn't completely disgusting I don't see a need to make it spotless. We have a toddler and are expecting in March and our home will always have the lived in look as opposed to the spotless look. And I am perfectly happy with that!
I am lazy too and my house def looks lived in! However, DH is a slob and will drop something near the trash and not pick it up, etc. It drives me nuts bc then it spirals out of control. However, on nights the teens aren't here (cuz then it's their turn), he does the dishes. He also washes all our laundry, towels and cloth diaps (just not the teens clothes).
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Old 10-07-2012, 11:13 AM   #20
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I'm all for lived-in versus spotless but there are certain things I can't stand. Clutter on the counter and odd things on the floor are two things that drive me crazy. DH piles trash on the counter rather than using the trash compactor, and routinely leaves trash on his TV tray. Or worse, brings his dirty dish to the sink but leaves crumpled trash on the dish instead of throwing it away. Really? Your counter-top trash pile is like a foot away but you leave it in the sink?

And DD's new thing is to pull everything out of the closet and strew hangers all over the floor. I HATE hangers on the floor. Might as throw some belts and a hair brush down there too and really watch my head explode.
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