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Old 10-10-2012, 11:04 AM   #1
Leanbh
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Say something to the teacher or let it go...

DS2 is in first grade, he's a shyer kinda boy in school(not at home!) and gets nervous to speak his piece or stray from the norm.

He is also a slow eater, which is a good thing, but not in school! So 9 days out of 10 he will come home with at least half his lunch if not more still left and say he doesn't have time to eat it. Then he is starving of course and eats what's left after school at home if I say it's still safe(no meat/mayo etc).

I allow them(Ds1 and him) to buy lunch once a week. DS1 loves it and it's a big treat for him. DS2 would love it, but he mostly opts out as he doesn't want to stand in line....hence taking away his precious eating time, plus I think he is shy to ask the lunch lady's for things.

Yesterday he bought lunch and came home starving. He said they are always late getting to lunch. Seems that the teacher won't let them go to lunch until they are all behaving waiting in line. So if the kids goof, then they delay, wait until they all behave. DS2 is pretty good and is not a goofer. So instead of the precious 15 mins to eat, they then only got 10 mins. And this happens all the time. So all he got to eat was some raisins and half a corn dog. He didn't even get to finish his corn dog as time was up.


He is now getting stressed about this and doesn't even want to buy lunch even though he'd like the food, but he'd prefer to actually have time to eat!

Do I email the teacher? He's gone from the house at 8.30am, not home until 3.30pm and that's all he ate all day yesterday

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Old 10-10-2012, 11:12 AM   #2
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Re: Say something to the teacher or let it go...

I would email the teacher, but approach it as 'what can we do?' instead of any 'my son says that they lose 5mins every day for...'

Just explain that you're concerned because your son is coming home from school with half his lunch uneaten and he explains that he doesn't have time and how he's very hungry by the end of the day. Ask them 'how much time does he get, sitting down, that he can eat his lunch if he brings it?' and if she says '15 minutes', subtly ask something like 'so you get to the lunchroom and then there's 15 minutes?' or something.

Actually stopping by and talking to the teacher in person might work better.

I remember having a snack time all the way through elementary, do they not have that anymore?
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Old 10-10-2012, 11:14 AM   #3
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Re: Say something to the teacher or let it go...

They seriously only get 15 minutes to eat? That is nuts to start with. I would at least mention it to her nicely and see how she reacts. He needs to eat to be able to concentrate imo.
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Old 10-10-2012, 11:27 AM   #4
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Re: Say something to the teacher or let it go...

We used to get only 15 mins in Junior High and it really wasn't enough. By the time we got to the gym to eat there was only 10 mins left. You'd have to scarf down you sandwich and drink and that's about all you'd have time for. I'm sure your son is not the only one. Maybe talk to some other parents. If most of the children don't have time to eat then the school needs to change their policy and give them more time. It's not healthy. A child whose hungry isn't going to be able to concentrate to learn.
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Old 10-10-2012, 11:32 AM   #5
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Re: Say something to the teacher or let it go...

Thanks, I'll email tonight then and see how today went. I know it's not a once off as it happens all the time coming home with his lunch.

Wasn't an issue with DS1 as he can eat fast if he needs to.

I can't stop by and talk to the teacher anytime soon as DH is away and I'm on my own this month, no babysitter. Plus I think with an email I'll be less likely to get overemotional and .....he said this and that.....


I know it's hard trying to figure out lunch for the entire class and it's not just him to take care of!

Oh, DS1 gets a snack in the morning this year as he is one of the later grades to go to lunch, DS2 is one of the first. Last year DS1 also got a snack, but in the afternoon.


His teacher is a 7 yr teacher of 1st grade, really good, but maybe she doesn't realize how hard it is for slow eaters like DS2. So I'll approach it as you said Emily, more inquisitive then WTH?
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Old 10-10-2012, 11:38 AM   #6
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Re: Say something to the teacher or let it go...

Quote:
Originally Posted by chandni3 View Post
We used to get only 15 mins in Junior High and it really wasn't enough. By the time we got to the gym to eat there was only 10 mins left. You'd have to scarf down you sandwich and drink and that's about all you'd have time for. I'm sure your son is not the only one. Maybe talk to some other parents. If most of the children don't have time to eat then the school needs to change their policy and give them more time. It's not healthy. A child whose hungry isn't going to be able to concentrate to learn.
This!

15 minutes is ridiculous especially for a young child and even more so if they have to wait in line to buy a lunch or end up late or both. I would definitely find a way to say something and I think asking the other parents if their child has the same issue is a great idea.
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Old 10-10-2012, 11:50 AM   #7
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Re: Say something to the teacher or let it go...

My son's school gives them 10 minutes to eat. It drives me insane, my son comes home starving every day. I hope you have good luck talking to the teacher!
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Old 10-10-2012, 11:54 AM   #8
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Re: Say something to the teacher or let it go...

If they are actually only getting 15 minutes a day, per school policy, I would begin working to change that policy. Address it with the principal, the school board, whereever that sort of thing goes. That's not long enough to eat at all! To be honest, I DO agree with how the teacher is handling things like goofing in line and such. I don't think that's the problem, I think the real problem is the policy of a 15 minute lunch. I think that's what needs to change.
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Old 10-10-2012, 12:04 PM   #9
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Re: Say something to the teacher or let it go...

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If they are actually only getting 15 minutes a day, per school policy, I would begin working to change that policy. Address it with the principal, the school board, whereever that sort of thing goes. That's not long enough to eat at all! To be honest, I DO agree with how the teacher is handling things like goofing in line and such. I don't think that's the problem, I think the real problem is the policy of a 15 minute lunch. I think that's what needs to change.
Gotta say I agree with that.

Also, ODD gets 30 minutes for lunch in Kindergarten here, and STILL comes home with half or more of her lunch uneaten and she is starving. Not sure what the deal is, but I can't imagine she just doesn't have time to eat.

My neighbor complains that her 8 and 10 year olds do the same thing - they just get busy talking to all their friends and "forget" to eat. If being hungry every day doesn't convince them to start actually eating at lunch time, there isn't much you can do!

And one last story. DH tells me all the time about how he only got 20 minutes to eat lunch in high school and that he was such a slow eater... he had to learn to eat FAST, and now he scarfs all his food so fast he barely tastes it... Ugh. It is ridiculous.

Good luck. But my bet is that the teacher sees a LOT of students that don't eat their food, and certainly can't force kids to eat. You will likely have better luck trying to get them a longer lunch period to begin with.
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Old 10-10-2012, 01:21 PM   #10
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Re: Say something to the teacher or let it go...

Well we are switching schools/moving house next year so not sure if I want to take on the school lunch policy in this school....I'd also rather approach the teacher and get her take rather than going straight to the principal/school.

I do get that the short period is part of the problem, but I would also like the teacher to be mindful of this and try to let the kids get the full time. Maybe they need to leave earlier.

It's hard as I know her plate is full too trying to squeeze in all that she needs from the curriculum. For example, DS2 was out for 3 days two weeks ago as he had strep. So woke up with strep tues, couldn't get him into the ped until weds, then on antibiotic, so "contagious" until thursday mid day. Sent him back to school Friday. Well she sent home ALL the work he had missed. It literally took us an hour to two every day for the next week to catch up. He had about 10 math pages, 5/6 vocab items plus his homework, plus his work from the following week. So they have a heavy load, but like pp said, if they can't eat then they can't focus.

I do see that kids also goof around in the lunch room and don't eat, but I don't think this is the issue. He is a slow eater and is to the point of getting upset about this whole lunch situation. Maybe I need to focus on high protein foods that will fill him up quickly...
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