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Old 10-31-2012, 09:56 AM   #1
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Is there something wrong with my baby?

Or am I doing something wrong? I'm at my wits end...

Let me preface this by saying I LOVE being a mom but seriously my dd (3months) cries ALL the time. I know it's not reflux cries bc we finally have that pretty much under control and these sound different. She barely sleeps during the day and when she does it's in my arms but it's not even a sound sleep, she's wiggling/moving sometimes grunting. If I put her down she's up within 15 min but she is soooooo tired constant circles under her eyes. She sleeps at night from 10ish-7am waking up about 3x to nurse, I have to cosleep with her in my arms in order for her to stay down. I don't want to cry it out since she's so little but she has GOT to learn how to sleep! I'm ok with cosleeping for now but I'm tired of not being able to put her down for any type of nap or the fact that she can't even fall asleep on her own. I don't know what to do or why this is so hard for her when all my friends babies sleep on their own all the time! I'm afraid she is falling behind developmentally bc she's held a LOT.

I'm not sure if she's crying because she's tired but I think lots of our problems stem from that. She does have severe reflux and has only been on a good protocol for about 2.5 weeks now, before that she was always in pain so that's what I attributed the poor sleep to but now? I'm not sure

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Old 10-31-2012, 10:09 AM   #2
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Re: Is there something wrong with my baby?

mackenna was the same way until we upped her reflux meds.
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Old 10-31-2012, 10:39 AM   #3
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Originally Posted by shortcake2386
mackenna was the same way until we upped her reflux meds.
TL is on benethechol every 6hrs, maalox every 8hours, and prevacid 2x a day I'm just not sure how much more medicine they should give her. She's stopped arching her back though when she cries.
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Old 10-31-2012, 10:44 AM   #4
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Re: Is there something wrong with my baby?

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Originally Posted by kaia.aline View Post
TL is on benethechol every 6hrs, maalox every 8hours, and prevacid 2x a day I'm just not sure how much more medicine they should give her. She's stopped arching her back though when she cries.
hmmmm never heard of the first but we do the other two. when mackenna got really fussy a few times we did tylenol and that helped, but it doesnt 'fix' anything its like a bandaid. is there a chance somethine else is bothering her? no ideas but something ike food sensitivities???
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Old 10-31-2012, 11:00 AM   #5
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I don't think she has food sensitivities, lately she has had really runny poop with no seeds but it's been like that since she started the benethechol so I attributed it to that.
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Old 10-31-2012, 11:18 AM   #6
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Re: Is there something wrong with my baby?

Just a few comments...

1) Since you are nursing, have you tried an elimination diet? With my lo, who also had reflux, I had to eliminate ALL dairy and ALL soy, including hidden forms, until I stopped nursing. I would start with dairy and soy elimination, and make sure you eliminate the hidden forms of soy (and you'll find soy is in virtually every processed food out there), and see if that helps. Give it a few weeks before you pass judgement.

2) I haven't heard of the first medicine, but maybe you need to change medications instead of upping what you are already giving her? We were fortunate that Zantac worked for us, but some things work for some babies and some work for others. You might ask if you can try switching to something else (and do one at a time).

3) At 3 months she is not going to be behind in development just because you are holding her a lot. Floor time is important, sure, but you're not going to mess her up by holding her.

4) Do you baby wear? If you don't I highly recommend you start. That will save your sanity for the daytime naps, and may help her to nap better because she will be upright. It will allow you to move around more freely, as well, which means you can get a few things done, or go to the store, or just walk around the neighborhood!

5) If you haven't already, try raising the head of her crib or you might try a product specifically designed for babies who need their heads raised. I believe it's called "nap nanny" That will help minimize the reflux

6) Can your DH help you get a break (or another family member)? A crying baby is maddening, and everyone needs a break from the constant sound.

7) It's very normal for a 3 month old baby to not fall asleep on their own. My 27 month old doesn't fall asleep on his own. CIO is not appropriate at this age, in my opinion (but I don't advocate CIO, ever, so I am biased). Particularly when you know the baby has reflux. If you need to put the baby down and take a break because you are losing your mind there's no shame in that, ever, but don't do CIO because you think it will help with the sleep issues.

8) If it were me, I might ask your pediatrician if you can see a specialist.

Hugs, mama.... It is SO hard when a baby has reflux issues and can't sleep. I've been there! But, believe it or not.....they do grow up....and honestly and truly--as bad as it is today---you DO forget and pretty soon all you can remember is how sweet and cute they were!
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Old 10-31-2012, 11:26 AM   #7
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Re: Is there something wrong with my baby?

Most 3mos olds do not cry all the time. I haven't experience with reflux but perhaps can assist with the sleep .

So night time sounds good. 10-7 with 3 feeds is great. I would expect soon to see a 5hr stretch without eating but regardless that all sounds fine.

What time do try to get her to sleep for her first nap if she is 'up' at 7am?
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Old 10-31-2012, 11:33 AM   #8
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Quote:
Originally Posted by dancermommy1
Just a few comments...

1) Since you are nursing, have you tried an elimination diet? With my lo, who also had reflux, I had to eliminate ALL dairy and ALL soy, including hidden forms, until I stopped nursing. I would start with dairy and soy elimination, and make sure you eliminate the hidden forms of soy (and you'll find soy is in virtually every processed food out there), and see if that helps. Give it a few weeks before you pass judgement.

2) I haven't heard of the first medicine, but maybe you need to change medications instead of upping what you are already giving her? We were fortunate that Zantac worked for us, but some things work for some babies and some work for others. You might ask if you can try switching to something else (and do one at a time).

3) At 3 months she is not going to be behind in development just because you are holding her a lot. Floor time is important, sure, but you're not going to mess her up by holding her.

4) Do you baby wear? If you don't I highly recommend you start. That will save your sanity for the daytime naps, and may help her to nap better because she will be upright. It will allow you to move around more freely, as well, which means you can get a few things done, or go to the store, or just walk around the neighborhood!

5) If you haven't already, try raising the head of her crib or you might try a product specifically designed for babies who need their heads raised. I believe it's called "nap nanny" That will help minimize the reflux

6) Can your DH help you get a break (or another family member)? A crying baby is maddening, and everyone needs a break from the constant sound.

7) It's very normal for a 3 month old baby to not fall asleep on their own. My 27 month old doesn't fall asleep on his own. CIO is not appropriate at this age, in my opinion (but I don't advocate CIO, ever, so I am biased). Particularly when you know the baby has reflux. If you need to put the baby down and take a break because you are losing your mind there's no shame in that, ever, but don't do CIO because you think it will help with the sleep issues.

8) If it were me, I might ask your pediatrician if you can see a specialist.

Hugs, mama.... It is SO hard when a baby has reflux issues and can't sleep. I've been there! But, believe it or not.....they do grow up....and honestly and truly--as bad as it is today---you DO forget and pretty soon all you can remember is how sweet and cute they were!
This. Great advice. Baby wearing saved me in the beginning. You can ne ver hold your baby too much.

And 1 other thing with my daughter sometimes if I wait til she's overly tired it's so much harder to put her down. I have to really watch for her very first signs of being tired and put her down then, as opposed to waiting till a certain nap time. I still have to nurse her to sleep nap time and at night though...
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Old 10-31-2012, 11:52 AM   #9
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Re: Is there something wrong with my baby?

do you swaddle for naps? if not, that could help.
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Old 10-31-2012, 12:09 PM   #10
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Re: Is there something wrong with my baby?

My dd was much like this and it got exhausting at times, but she outgrew it mostly and is on track or even a bit ahead developmentally at 1. Still needs a lot of holding, cosleeping, etc but plays on her own for stretches and is generally happy.

I agree with babywearing as much as you can- this really saved me so many times when nothing else would work. Aside from being soothing, the upright position can help with any tummy troubles or reflux. And if she'll stay asleep or calm in the car try some drives to get her to sleep. I agree that she is too young for any kind of sleep training. Just use whatever means possible to help her sleep and be comfortable. Get some help if you can because taking care of a high needs baby is hard and you need a break sometimes!

Previous poster had some great advice and I agree with it all. This will pass, but in the meantime know that you are doing everything you can to meet her needs and give yourself as much rest and grace as possible. Hugs to you mama!
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