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Old 11-08-2012, 03:31 PM   #1
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Calling all allergy mamas (with kids in school/daycare)

DD has maintained a rash around her mouth for a while (search for the thread if you want). It is much better but still flares up. The dr suggest we start an elimination diet starting with red dye. I told her school about this when she started in October. No one (school or my family) were holding to it. Family would 'forget' a lot. With Halloween approaching we just said eff it because I walked into her class as they are handing her m&m's and jelly beans

On Friday of last week I talked to the assistant director and told her what was up and that I wasn't worried that it wasn't being followed thus far but I wanted to realy eliminate red dye after Halloween. She was on board and gave some great suggestions.

Tuesday morning I drafted a detailed letter and even provided snacks for them to give DD. I stated in the letter I wanted them to only give her food I send because it just cuts down on the confusion. I sat there with her teacher and the director and went over the letter and told them that if they wanted anymore food/drinks for her to just let me know and that I wanted this to be easy as possible on everyone. i also told them to please share the info with any teacher who would be in the position to give DD food.

First off, on Tuesday DD came home and said they gave her a white jellybean. Today, I picked her up from extended stay because I had to work and she had orange stuff on her face. I asked her what she ate for snack and she said cheese balls and graham crackers (note: for extended stay they are not in her classroom, there were two teachers in there like in all the classes, one was Haileys teacher, the other wasn't). I asked them what she ate for snack and they said cheeseballs...then it dawned on her teacher. She was like "I forgot"....uhhhh duh! What if this was a life threatening allergy? Would she forget then? What happens if this is what is causing the rash and it progresses further to causing mouth/throat swelling? What if the allergen is something else that we haven't thought about yet and they feed it to her? I told them we need 6 weeks of it eliminatd to see if it is indeed the allergen. I will be one mad mother if we get to like week 4 with no dye and they eff it up! It's already hard enough with her going between 3 grandparents, her dad, and me and now school is added in.

What do I do? Do I need to talk to everyone again? I now have to provide snacks for them to keep in the other classroom in case she is in there again but how am I supposed to trust 4+ people at her school alone to remember not to feed her anything but what I send? I don't know what to do and I am still quite peeved off about the whole situation.

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Old 11-08-2012, 03:53 PM   #2
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Re: Calling all allergy mamas (with kids in school/daycare)

It is hard I know. For the first 18 months after my ds2 was diagnosed with severe red meat and possible peanut allergy he only ate what came from our home. I thought I could trust adults to not feed him meat at least and then he (at 6 years old) came home from daycare and said Mrs.T tried to feed me pepperoni today but I told her not meat. I called her and she "got confused" and thought he was allergic to chicken.

I have also learned a lot of people don't take it seriously. You will have to remind people constantly and it is very aggravating but necessary. I sent specific snacks for him and packed breakfast and lunch for him daily even if he went to stay with my mom or aunt I would pack a bag of groceries and he knew that it needed cooked separate. Just 2 weeks ago my mom tried to cook his turkey burger in the same pan as a bratwurst. Just stay consistent and you may need to send all her food with her.
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Old 11-08-2012, 05:01 PM   #3
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Re: Calling all allergy mamas (with kids in school/daycare)

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Originally Posted by TalkinBoutMyGirl View Post

What do I do? Do I need to talk to everyone again? I now have to provide snacks for them to keep in the other classroom in case she is in there again but how am I supposed to trust 4+ people at her school alone to remember not to feed her anything but what I send? I don't know what to do and I am still quite peeved off about the whole situation.
Without medical documentation they will probably "forget" again. We're lucky- I guess- because dd requires an Epi and no-one wants to administer the epi. You will need to talk to everyone again and remind them. Unfortunately you will have to be firmer then you probably want to be. Being THAT PARENT is fun- not. But sometimes its required.

You can buy buttons or stickers and put them on her every day until your done with the elimination diet. We have these on just about every thing dd takes to school http://www.namebubbles.com/labels/di...ertbubble.html . They are on her lunch bag, her thermos, all food containers. Ours says (under the allergy alert)- her allergies, "PLEASE DON'T FEED ME" and has my phone number. We have these for field trips and unfamiliar situations http://www.zazzle.com/dotted_edge_bu...09803680038934 . Those would probably work well for you- they are cheap and can be moved to different clothes. We have one of these too, but for your purposes probably not so good http://www.zazzle.com/don%27t+feed+m...llergy+tshirts . We also have a luggage tag on her back pack. Maybe a little overkill for you at this point, but dd's is life threatening so we want to make sure everybody sees her. Once your done then you should get documentation from you doc with what you figure out. With the buttons or stickers if they truly are just forgetting that should solve that. I think I saw someone recommend once to write it on their hands so the teacher will see it when they hand them something.
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Old 11-10-2012, 01:58 PM   #4
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Without medical documentation they will probably "forget" again. We're lucky- I guess- because dd requires an Epi and no-one wants to administer the epi. You will need to talk to everyone again and remind them. Unfortunately you will have to be firmer then you probably want to be. Being THAT PARENT is fun- not. But sometimes its required.

You can buy buttons or stickers and put them on her every day until your done with the elimination diet. We have these on just about every thing dd takes to school http://www.namebubbles.com/labels/di...ertbubble.html . They are on her lunch bag, her thermos, all food containers. Ours says (under the allergy alert)- her allergies, "PLEASE DON'T FEED ME" and has my phone number. We have these for field trips and unfamiliar situations http://www.zazzle.com/dotted_edge_bu...09803680038934 . Those would probably work well for you- they are cheap and can be moved to different clothes. We have one of these too, but for your purposes probably not so good http://www.zazzle.com/don%27t+feed+m...llergy+tshirts . We also have a luggage tag on her back pack. Maybe a little overkill for you at this point, but dd's is life threatening so we want to make sure everybody sees her. Once your done then you should get documentation from you doc with what you figure out. With the buttons or stickers if they truly are just forgetting that should solve that. I think I saw someone recommend once to write it on their hands so the teacher will see it when they hand them something.
All of this. My LO has a bunch of allergies with peanut and milk being life threatening, and corn being severe but not life threatening. She's still little so we aren't dealing with schools but I will be doing all of this when she is. I don't let anyone feed her unless it's been approved by me first. Even grandparents have fed her stuff she can't have knowing it can harm her.

I'd also be that parent, and go to the principal/director and point out that they are feeding her things she can't have. Not only will it probably get a reminder sent out to everyone about allergies, but them spoken to directly and they probably won't forget then.
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Old 11-10-2012, 07:22 PM   #5
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Re: Calling all allergy mamas (with kids in school/daycare)

My ds doesn't have an allergy but we try to limit gluten as much as possible. He's dye free at home but I don't force it at school since its not an allergy situation.

He's nonverbal so he certainly isn't going to tell anyone. What did help was educating the other little kids in the classroom since they are great at keeping track of that kind of stuff . I also kept snacks in the classroom that he loved and I sent multiple snacks each day.
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Old 11-10-2012, 11:08 PM   #6
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My child's allergy is life threatening but people still don't get it. I think for the most part people have the greatest intention but unless it is something that is personal to them they just don't get it.
The best thing you can do is educate your chid. My daughter was. 18mos when she was diagnosed, fortunately she was very verbal and we taught her to tell everyone that handed her food she was allergic to peanuts/nuts.
The school situation is frustrating, I have never had issues with school/OSC but my daughter wears a medic alert and they are both peanut/nut free centers. I send safe snacks for when birthday treats are sent in and that are homemade.
I guess I would just keep talking to them over and over, they will get it
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Old 11-11-2012, 12:31 AM   #7
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Re: Calling all allergy mamas (with kids in school/daycare)

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My child's allergy is life threatening but people still don't get it. I think for the most part people have the greatest intention but unless it is something that is personal to them they just don't get it.
The best thing you can do is educate your chid. My daughter was. 18mos when she was diagnosed, fortunately she was very verbal and we taught her to tell everyone that handed her food she was allergic to peanuts/nuts.
The school situation is frustrating, I have never had issues with school/OSC but my daughter wears a medic alert and they are both peanut/nut free centers. I send safe snacks for when birthday treats are sent in and that are homemade.
I guess I would just keep talking to them over and over, they will get it
DD will totally pipe up and ask us and family "Does that have red 40?!" lol but when I asked her why she ate the cheese balls she just shrugged and said they were good LOL She is good about remembering that she can't have red dye but obviously the yummy factor wins sometimes lol She cracks me up. I guess I'll just have to talk to them again...gah!
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Old 11-11-2012, 05:11 AM   #8
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Re: Calling all allergy mamas (with kids in school/daycare)

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Originally Posted by TalkinBoutMyGirl View Post
DD will totally pipe up and ask us and family "Does that have red 40?!" lol but when I asked her why she ate the cheese balls she just shrugged and said they were good LOL She is good about remembering that she can't have red dye but obviously the yummy factor wins sometimes lol She cracks me up. I guess I'll just have to talk to them again...gah!
The best way to approach that is to teach to accept no food- regardless- unless its been approved by you. Even asking if a food contains a something will not get you free. Most people don't know what it is in there food and don't even bother with labels. Again this is something easier (I guess) because dd's is life threatening and she knows that it is- yumminess isn't something she can play with. DD is trained to not even accept food from her teacher unless its been pre-approved by me- after her preschool teacher gave her something she wasn't suppose to. DD told me the teacher read the label and said it was safe- it was peanut free, but the teacher apparently forgot that dd has a dairy sensitivity. Like a pp said even the most well meaning person isn't going to be perfect.
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Old 11-11-2012, 07:56 AM   #9
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Re: Calling all allergy mamas (with kids in school/daycare)

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Originally Posted by jbug_4 View Post
The best way to approach that is to teach to accept no food- regardless- unless its been approved by you. Even asking if a food contains a something will not get you free. Most people don't know what it is in there food and don't even bother with labels. Again this is something easier (I guess) because dd's is life threatening and she knows that it is- yumminess isn't something she can play with. DD is trained to not even accept food from her teacher unless its been pre-approved by me- after her preschool teacher gave her something she wasn't suppose to. DD told me the teacher read the label and said it was safe- it was peanut free, but the teacher apparently forgot that dd has a dairy sensitivity. Like a pp said even the most well meaning person isn't going to be perfect.
In my letter, and I even said it to the teacher, I stated that I wanted her to only eat food that I send. Her teacher even said that she wouldn't feed her anything I don't send.
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Old 11-11-2012, 08:23 AM   #10
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We have school and my ILs to deal with.
Ds1 has a milk protein allergy. When he has it he is up half the night crying/tossing and turning.
His behavior is out of control to the extreme.

Im nursing dd2 and can't have dairy, beef and a number of other things. I have any dairy and with 5-8 hours her bum is a bloody rash.

The school has allowed him to have ice cream

My ILs are the worst!
He goes there and they feed him cheese whiz on toast. Ice cream sandwiches. Ect.
We went there to celebrate ds1s birthday for dinner. MIL made ds's birthday cake with milk instead of water and made the mashed potatoes with milk

It pisses me off because she seems to keep my nephews peanut allergy straight. Always makes sure things are peanut free for him.
With us she "forgets" though.

Eta you would think she would get it.
When he comes home from there and am up half the night with him we ask her what she fed him.
She will say oh he had some cheese whiz on toast !

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