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Old 12-05-2012, 01:52 PM   #1
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Baby who isn't affectionate

Just wondering if other mamas here have experience with babies or toddlers who seem to be developing normally and just aren't physically affectionate. My 1-year-old DD2 doesn't hug, snuggle, or try to kiss at all. Meanwhile, her twin brother has been doing all of those things for several months. I don't think there's anything "wrong" with her. She's starting to walk, says a few words, smiles and laughs a lot, expresses excitement about things like seeing her sippy cup, our pets, her big sister, etc... she just doesn't show any physical affection at all. She doesn't mind being touched and loves when I wear her in a carrier, so I don't think it's a sensory issue. I guess I'm just disappointed. When will my baby girl hug me???


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Old 12-05-2012, 03:00 PM   #2
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Re: Baby who isn't affectionate

DD wasn't very affectionate.. and still really isn't. She can be, from time to time.. but it's definitely not like some kids.

The other day, she was hugging the 'momma nesting doll' and I was really jealous.

when she was about 1yo, she was really not affectionate, but it has gotten better. When I super need her cuddles, I admit, I put on an episode of Yo Gabba Gabba and hold her on my chest so that I can feel my baby against me.

add to that that she didn't say 'mama' until about 21 months, and I was feeling pretty rotten for awhile. She would push us away when we tried to hug or kiss her.

I hope your baby gets more affectionate as mine has. I think it helped when daddy and mommy up'd the PDA level he was deployed for almost half her life and so she wasn't really used to seeing people be affectionate. but who knows, maybe she would have been the same either way.
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Old 12-05-2012, 03:26 PM   #3
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Re: Baby who isn't affectionate

DD2 wasn't really a cuddle bug til close to 2.
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Old 12-05-2012, 03:31 PM   #4
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Re: Baby who isn't affectionate

my 10 month old is the same way. I also cheat and put baby einstein on when he's tired so he will sit on my lap....he's my only one so i don't have any advice except sneak it in when you can. ie when they are sleeping!
Loving wife to my gaming, sports loving hubbie. Sahm to J 2/12 and L 10/13
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Old 12-05-2012, 03:39 PM   #5
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Re: Baby who isn't affectionate

Are you talking about my DD??? My DD was the same way, my son the total opposite Even as a newborn, she wanted to be put down to play and sleep (twist my sleep deprived arm). She pretty affectionate now but it's absolutely on her terms.
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Old 12-05-2012, 07:20 PM   #6
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Re: Baby who isn't affectionate

For my two girls, they only wanted snuggles/cuddling while nursing. Even now affection is on their terms, and they are 5 and 3. My DS, 1yo, started giving "baby" kisses and hugging right around 10mths, especially towards his sisters, but also to me and other family members. Maybe his nature is more affectionate, but it could be in response to how much his sisters smother him with hugs and kisses His temperament is much different than the two girls, who are more alike.
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Old 12-05-2012, 08:42 PM   #7
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Re: Baby who isn't affectionate

My 5 year old was always on the go and never snuggly. She's better now that she is older. But sitting in my lap was torture to her! She is a sensory kid, which we know a lot more about now that she is older.
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Old 12-05-2012, 09:12 PM   #8
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Re: Baby who isn't affectionate

DS1 wasn't a cuddler/affectionate. Now at 3 years old he'll hug and kiss me and want to sit in my lap. He didn't tell me he loved me until he was 3 years old either.

DS2 will cuddle with me.

just personality differences
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Old 12-05-2012, 10:33 PM   #9
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Re: Baby who isn't affectionate

My 10yr old has never been a very affectionate kid, even as a baby. It's just his personality. He's a very loving kid, don't get me wrong. He tells me he loves me, he always wants to talk with me but he's just never been very touchy feely
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Old 12-06-2012, 05:45 AM   #10
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Re: Baby who isn't affectionate

From talking with friends and family I've come to the very scientific conclusion that boys are way more cuddly than girls My dd wasn't and still isn't overly affectionate. DS however still LOVES to sit with me and on me lol. He loves having someone cuddle up with him at bedtime, he's almost 6.
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