Reply Hey Mom! Learn more about the Gerber Life Insurance Grow-Up Plan!
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 12-11-2012, 11:11 PM   #11
jessnic's Avatar
jessnic
Registered Users
seller
seller
 
Join Date: Feb 2011
Posts: 2,553
What are you sending for her lunches? What does her pediatrician day?

Where does her dad stand on this?

Advertisement

__________________
Married to my best friend, living the navy wife life, and loving every minute of being a SAHM to DS (born July 2011)!
jessnic is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-12-2012, 01:25 AM   #12
sisu
Registered Users
seller
seller
 
Join Date: Jan 2010
Posts: 7,367
Quote:
Originally Posted by harmoni247 View Post
Have you talked to your ex? I think the most important thing at this point is to get him on the same page as you. No matter what changes you make, she will likely have emotional food problems if it's not supported in both homes. After that, I agree 100% with the first poster.
I think you need to discuss this with her dad, too. From your post, I get the vibe that he may be stressing the idea that "fat is beautiful" to her... either in an effort to reassure her that she is beautiful no matter what (and of course she is, but it is obviously important to emphasize good health, as well) or because he has his own unresolved issues with eating/weight.
sisu is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-17-2013, 06:59 PM   #13
Pabas
Registered Users
 
Join Date: Dec 2012
Posts: 3
Re: My DD wants to be overweight?!?!

I know it's been nearly a year, but I need to come back here. I actually forgot this site existed for the longest time.

First of all, you can feel free you criticize me all you want because I deserve it. But after a couple months of fighting after I posted here, my ex insisted he was feeding our DD right, and my DD would keep throwing fits whenever she didn't get enough food. And in about Febuary when she hit the 100 pound mark I just gave up. And I gave in to everything she asked for.

So now here I am almost a year after I joined and her weight skyrocketed up to 138 pounds. But I came here for a reason. After coming back from the doctor yesterday I found out my DD is pre diabetic and is now technically morbidly obese. As soon as we got home I had a fit and threw out every single fatty snack we had in the house and I was crying so much that my DD didn't even ask for her snacks like she usually does. But there is a brightside. I talked to my ex today and he told me, for the first time, we need to work together and change our DD's health and weight. He even admitted that he thinks she's gotten too big now, which was a huge surprise to me because I always thought he'd let her get to 300 pounds if I wasn't around.


So the advice I'm asking for right now is a yes or no to the cold turkey method. Today was already tough. I was giving her fruits instead of sugary snacks and she had to have eaten 5 apples today, which I know is too much even if it is fruit. I just need to learn how to set limits with these healthy foods, and if anyone from experience knows if weaning or cold turkey is a better path to healthy eating. And it's embarassing to admit again and again but remember that this is a little girl thats been eating like an unhealthy adult for almost a year.
Pabas is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-17-2013, 07:11 PM   #14
tallanvor
Registered Users
seller
 
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Oklahoma
Posts: 13,354
Re: My DD wants to be overweight?!?!

I think cold turkey will probably be best. It will be hard on y'all, but the sooner she gets used to the new food, the better. I think I would start with just getting healthier foods in her, then start cutting back on the amount and adding in exercise. Make sure you do the exercising with her so she's not feeling singled out and try to make it all fun stuff. Good luck!
tallanvor is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 11-17-2013, 07:46 PM   #15
BeccaSueCongdon's Avatar
BeccaSueCongdon
Registered Users
seller
seller
 
Join Date: May 2012
Posts: 3,621
I honestly think the best route would be to find a registered dietician who can work with you as a family to come up with a pre-diabetes management sort of diet. And I think it'll be necessary to have her and you guys meet with a counselor. There are issues she's trying to mask/avoid by eating that way, and there's a dysfunctional dynamic in place in yor family that has allowed it continue. Changing her diet and lifestyle will help and are necessary, but it won't stick if the underlying issues aren't addressed. She needs new tools for dealing with her feelings/boredom. And you and her dad need better tools for supporting her in a healthy lifestyle.
BeccaSueCongdon is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-17-2013, 08:06 PM   #16
Tris's Avatar
Tris
Registered Users
seller
seller
 
Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 3,535
My Mood:
Re: My DD wants to be overweight?!?!

Quote:
Originally Posted by BeccaSueCongdon View Post
I honestly think the best route would be to find a registered dietician who can work with you as a family to come up with a pre-diabetes management sort of diet. And I think it'll be necessary to have her and you guys meet with a counselor. There are issues she's trying to mask/avoid by eating that way, and there's a dysfunctional dynamic in place in yor family that has allowed it continue. Changing her diet and lifestyle will help and are necessary, but it won't stick if the underlying issues aren't addressed. She needs new tools for dealing with her feelings/boredom. And you and her dad need better tools for supporting her in a healthy lifestyle.
This times 1000. You all need support in this, and toold and guidelines so you cant just stick your head in sand again.
__________________
J- sahm to Z~12.07, A~4.09 and J~ 8.13
Tris is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-17-2013, 08:15 PM   #17
mibarra
Registered Users
seller
 
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 8,975
Quote:
Originally Posted by BeccaSueCongdon View Post
I honestly think the best route would be to find a registered dietician who can work with you as a family to come up with a pre-diabetes management sort of diet. And I think it'll be necessary to have her and you guys meet with a counselor. There are issues she's trying to mask/avoid by eating that way, and there's a dysfunctional dynamic in place in yor family that has allowed it continue. Changing her diet and lifestyle will help and are necessary, but it won't stick if the underlying issues aren't addressed. She needs new tools for dealing with her feelings/boredom. And you and her dad need better tools for supporting her in a healthy lifestyle.
I agree. She'll really need to detox from junk.
mibarra is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-17-2013, 08:52 PM   #18
Pollypocket's Avatar
Pollypocket
Registered Users
seller
 
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: California
Posts: 297
Quote:
Originally Posted by BeccaSueCongdon
I honestly think the best route would be to find a registered dietician who can work with you as a family to come up with a pre-diabetes management sort of diet. And I think it'll be necessary to have her and you guys meet with a counselor. There are issues she's trying to mask/avoid by eating that way, and there's a dysfunctional dynamic in place in yor family that has allowed it continue. Changing her diet and lifestyle will help and are necessary, but it won't stick if the underlying issues aren't addressed. She needs new tools for dealing with her feelings/boredom. And you and her dad need better tools for supporting her in a healthy lifestyle.
This exactly. Especially the part about seeing a therapist. Just make sure it is one who specializes in dealing with young children.
__________________
Mama to L '07 & A '12
Pollypocket is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-17-2013, 09:18 PM   #19
Sarah-B's Avatar
Sarah-B
Registered Users
seller
seller
 
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 3,696
Quote:
Originally Posted by raymark
I would very happily provide any hungry child with more fresh fruits, vegetables, or air popped pop corn without added butter.

I would completely ignore her weight comments & immediately stop any and all weight references comming from myself. And, I would talk to her dad about getting her involved in any activities she's expressed any interest in (horse riding, ice skating, sports, dance, theatre, martial arts, music....). I would toss unhealthy snacks, load up on healthy foods, & let her eat to her hearts desire. I would also find ways to be active with her without it appearing as if you're trying to get her to exercise for weight loss (tickle fights, window shopping=lots of walkin, bike rides, crazy dance while cooking dinner together). I would also watch what she drinks. If you buy sodas & juices then stop buying them & don't tell her it's because of her - you can make an excuse of wanting to be healthier yourself or needing to watch your blood sugar. Buy her cute fancy water bottles she will think are cool to carry around & keep her hydrated with water. We all misinterpret thirst signals as hunger signals & eat less when we'll hydrated.

If she notices you're making a lot of health changes I'd take her out for a small portion of fancy ice cream once a week to make the changes easier to accept.

Do you have room for a large outdoor trampoline? No kid can resist a trampoline & they are really a workout?

Most importantly - no matter what her size, tell her she is beautiful & loved!
This is seriously amazing advice!!
Sarah-B is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-17-2013, 10:27 PM   #20
threelittlehoneys's Avatar
threelittlehoneys
formerly R***and**********
seller
seller
 
Join Date: May 2010
Posts: 7,009
What did the doctor suggest for diet changes?

I wouldn't go cold turkey to a healthy diet with small portions. That would be too hard on anyone. I'd allow her to eat literally as much fruit and veggies (fresh) as she wanted. Make sure the rest of her diet is as healthy as possible. And I would reward her, somewhat frequently at first and then cut back, with something indulgent but relatively healthy, like dark chocolate, a bit of natural ingredient ice cream,etc. Ime it's extremely difficult to change your diet and I wouldn't expect anyone to be able to just turn on a dime like that.
Kefir and granola is pretty tasty and very healthy.

I'd work on the diet first and then add in physical activity.

Theres no reason to panic though, The good thing is our bodies are pretty amazing and able to heal themselves. Take it slow and don't add extra stress, this is going to be very hard on her already.

Adding juice plus to her diet can help. Adding probiotics can help. Cut out every drink other than water.

Of course keep in contact with her doctor and I'd you feel she has underlying issues and needs to see a therapist do that as well. Good luck and keep us updated. I remember reading your original post a year ago.

Sent from my iPhone using DS Forum

Last edited by threelittlehoneys; 11-17-2013 at 10:28 PM.
threelittlehoneys is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump

Copyright 2005 - 2014 Escalate Media. All Rights Reserved.