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Old 12-13-2012, 01:34 PM   #11
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Re: Do your kids throw fits whenever they have to sit down to eat?

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Perhaps I need to allow at least an extra half hour to discipline them over this?
I probably would, until they stop with the bad behavior.

Or, you could do the natural consequence, which would be "you didn't eat when it was time to eat and now you have to wait until next meal time to eat." If you do that, you may want to let the teacher know when you drop them off, so she(or he) doesn't think you're starving them, and pack extra in their lunches.

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Old 12-13-2012, 01:52 PM   #12
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Re: Do your kids throw fits whenever they have to sit down to eat?

Do they maybe need more time to be awake before breakfast? My oldest prefers to be awake for awhile before she eats breakfast, but my youngest climbs out of bed and immediately comes and asks what's to eat. If possible, adjust bedtimes so they could be up a little earlier before having to eat.

Another idea would be to send them with something they can eat on the go, but I don't know if that would be a good option for you.

You could also explain to them that they have this set amount of time (using the timer) because of school and that if they can't eat in that time, they'll just be hungry until lunch time. And I wouldn't pack extra in their lunches. To me, that wouldn't get the point across that they need to eat in the morning without a fit.

Now, if they are the type of person that needs to be up for awhile, you might also talk to their teachers and see if you have the option of sending them with some fruit or a granola bar to eat as a snack.
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Old 12-13-2012, 02:08 PM   #13
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Or, you could do the natural consequence, which would be "you didn't eat when it was time to eat and now you have to wait until next meal time to eat." If you do that, you may want to let the teacher know when you drop them off, so she(or he) doesn't think you're starving them, and pack extra in their lunches.
This. If youre not going to eat, play, cry, or ruin everyone elses meal then you leave the table and you can eat at the next meal/snack. If you la-lee-gag around and dont eat but we have to leave, then tough cookies. Its your tummy that will be growling.
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Old 12-13-2012, 03:37 PM   #14
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School or not, IMHO they are old enough for this life lesson. If it were my child doing this, he would go to school hungry.
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Old 12-13-2012, 03:52 PM   #15
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Re: Do your kids throw fits whenever they have to sit down to eat?

Like a previous poster I am likely considered harsh. My kids are required to eat at least 3 bites of any food served. They are however not required to clean their plates. Whining or fussing will result in no food. They can wait for the next meal if needed. It rarely takes more than one missed meal to stop the complaints or tantrums. Unless it is ds1 he frequently just isn't hungry enough to care if he eats or not. He has often waited for the next meal quite happily.

Now if my kid had food issues this would change how I would react according th my child's differing needs.
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Old 12-14-2012, 07:05 AM   #16
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Re: Do your kids throw fits whenever they have to sit down to eat?

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School or not, IMHO they are old enough for this life lesson. If it were my child doing this, he would go to school hungry.
I understand the sentiment behind this and don't have a problem if other parents do it, but for me, personally, it feels like neglect to let a child miss an entire meal, especially when he will be away from me at school and should be nourished in order to learn.

we are working on it. no problems this morning because they liked the meal (scrambled eggs)- maybe that's my problem, I need to work on my cooking? LOL
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Old 12-14-2012, 08:48 AM   #17
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Re: Do your kids throw fits whenever they have to sit down to eat?

DS is in feeding therapy, so he HAS to eat breakfast. He also has ODD, so if something becomes a battle of wills, you have world war 3 on your hands. We don't subscribe to the "you'll just be hungry" philosophy at our house either. Some kids just don't get hungry. DS doesn't know what hunger is. DD could care less when/if we eat, and would never ask for a meal.

We start breakfast at 7:20, and the bus comes at 8:30 for the 5 year old and 8:40 for the 3 year old. It gives us enough time that if DS is being difficult, we have some wiggle room. It also helps that this way, the morning isn't chaotic and rushed. If things are stressful at home before DS gets on the bus, he will have a terrible day at school. So, we wake the kids up at 6:45 and carry them over to my bed, put on PBS and let them watch for about 15 minutes, then get dressed, and then go downstairs for breakfast. DS gets to pick yogurt or oatmeal, and whether he was colored sprinkles or "brown sprinkles" (brown sugar) on his oatmeal. We have the same choices every day, and it is routine to him now. He also has a banana with it, and 5 ounces of Peptamin, his medical formula. DD can pick oatmeal, yogurt, or cereal. I think by offering the same choices every day, it helps. And, since the kid picked, things go better.

After breakfast, we have time to watch a little more TV, practice sight words for my kindergartener's daily test, do hair, put shoes on, and go potty before the bus comes.
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Old 12-14-2012, 09:17 AM   #18
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Re: Do your kids throw fits whenever they have to sit down to eat?

When in their morning routine are they eating breakfast? Maybe you need to tweek the morning routine and give them a bit more time. Dd1 needs a good 15-20 minutes of wake up time in her room before asking her to do anything in the morning. So we make sure and wake her up and tthen give her 15 minutes to read - and the little kids have to leave her alone during this time.

Dd1 is a dawdler at eating breakfast - she just is. I have no good explanation for this other than she is just not awake enough to be hurried through breakfast. So eating a bowl of cereal can take 30 minutes so i've built into our morning routine 30 minutes for breakfast. After having plenty of time to read and eat she perks up and getting out the door goes so much smoother. If I rush her she'll just end up in a bad mood and we will be running late.

So maybe rethink your morning routine a bit and see if that helps any.
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Old 12-14-2012, 10:31 AM   #19
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Re: Do your kids throw fits whenever they have to sit down to eat?

I would send them to school without breakfast. Honestly, you probably won't have to do it very often. I have found that big punishments like this shock my son into straightening up. Ds always eats a good breaksfast. It's his best meal of the day. He can be a real turd about dinner though. I don't make him eat anything. But he can't have seconds of anything until he has eaten everything on his plate. Otherwise he would pick his favorite thing on the plate and eat only that. If he doesn't eat much, he goes to bed without anything else to eat. He knows if he's hungry enough, he has to eat what is put in front of him.
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Old 12-14-2012, 01:57 PM   #20
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Re: Do your kids throw fits whenever they have to sit down to eat?

Im having this same problem with my DS (4), over lunch and dinner.

But the problem is, he'll skip the meal, want something later, so I present what he refused and he still will not eat. Its gotten so bad that he has dropped from the 50th percentile to the 25th. I have just turned to giving him his favorite options. My kids are already on the small side and struggle to keep their weight up (our DD's eat anything and everything and they are still on the lower end of weight curve).

I think what a pp said about having the same thing (oatmeal or cereal) as options would be a great idea. Not exactly what I can do for my situation though, DH would die!
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