Advice on TTC..

[MyKzooFamily]

We are back and forth about TTC our #3. (Hoping for 3, 4 at most)

Pros:
A September Baby (weather is still warm before winter in December)
Children would be 18-19 months apart (we didn't like the huge 3.5 yr spacing)
DH wants to finish having kids ASAP
DH wants to have kids while we still have little ones, instead of large spacing

Cons:
DH's job is changing in June, and he could potentially be jobless
- However, PRO to this is we will have $ to get us through until he got a new one, and he would easily find a new one, might just not make as much

DS says he does not want to go to school, and wants to be homeschooled.

I do daycare, so I could potentially have a newbie, 4-5 young ones to watch, PLUS a 5 year old that wants to be homeschooled. That would be too much. On the flip side, DS could decide he likes school, and go. And I could have daycare kids drop between now and then (it happens a lot with parents losing jobs).


My Opinion:
The DH job situation scares me a little, however, I am frugal enough to live off of next-to-nothing, and we will have savings. I am also considering homeschooling DS, so if we had to move, no super huge stress on us. I have moved before at 36 weeks pregnant (with me doing lots of heavy lifting), so it doesn't scare me. I don't mind a 2.5 year gap, I think it would be perfect. But DH wants to be done with babies ASAP. I'm afraid if I wait, he will want to be done, and I will feel our family is incomplete. We want 4 kids, but we are ready to be done with the baby stage, it's hard on us. So DH's idea is - let's get it done!

I'm just not sure if I should jump on that train, and we will work through whatever comes our way (job, move, etc.) or if I should stay on the side of caution and try to wait it out until we are more secure with everything.

What would you do?

[Nickel+3]

I'd go for it! There will never be a perfect time to have a baby so why wait?!

[MyKzooFamily]

Originally Posted by Nickel+3 I'd go for it! There will never be a perfect time to have a baby so why wait?!

Thanks!!

No one was replying, I was getting nervous!

[ardeur]

A few words about homeschooling a 5yo: it's not hard at that age! You definitely don't need any kind of curriculum, nor do you need to spend 3, 4, 5 hours a days "doing school" at that age. Read a few books together, do a few minutes of math and vocab flash cards, watch an educational video, play an educational video game, do some coloring/painting/arts, or play an educational game. Have him learn to help prepare simple meals at breakfast/snack/lunch/dinnertime, learn a new chore alongside you, or talk about nature and any wild animals you see when you go on a walk. These are just some examples of you'd do at that age, and you can integrate these things into every day life.

But... DH being without a job would be my chief concern. We'll be facing that situation soon ourselves. I totally understand. :-(

[jenniferaj072806]

I agree with Nickel! There is never a 100% "right time" to try for a little one and you also never know how easy or hard it will be. It may take 1 month, it may take 10 months so I say give it a go !!

[Pixi6s]

I agree with others, I also understand the winter baby.... My son was born 1/7 and I really don't want #2 to be in the winter to. We are going to be stopping soon for a few months... but putting it off scares me too.

[MyKzooFamily]

Originally Posted by ardeur A few words about homeschooling a 5yo: it's not hard at that age! You definitely don't need any kind of curriculum, nor do you need to spend 3, 4, 5 hours a days "doing school" at that age. Read a few books together, do a few minutes of math and vocab flash cards, watch an educational video, play an educational video game, do some coloring/painting/arts, or play an educational game. Have him learn to help prepare simple meals at breakfast/snack/lunch/dinnertime, learn a new chore alongside you, or talk about nature and any wild animals you see when you go on a walk. These are just some examples of you'd do at that age, and you can integrate these things into every day life. But... DH being without a job would be my chief concern. We'll be facing that situation soon ourselves. I totally understand. :-(

Very true about the homeschooling!! And luckily I will have daycare kids I can watch, and he would get unemployment, his student loans would be deferred, and we would get food stamps along with Medicaid, so we would actually be able to cover all of our bills, and just use a little bit of our savings each month. And our savings would cover us (alone - no income or assistance) for 6 months, so we'll be okay.

Thanks lades, I appreciate the nice words!

[trying4more]

I say GO FOR IT!
Everything will work itself out!!!

[MyKzooFamily]

Originally Posted by Nickel+3 I'd go for it! There will never be a perfect time to have a baby so why wait?!

Originally Posted by jenniferaj072806 I agree with Nickel! There is never a 100% "right time" to try for a little one and you also never know how easy or hard it will be. It may take 1 month, it may take 10 months so I say give it a go !!

Originally Posted by Pixi6s I agree with others, I also understand the winter baby.... My son was born 1/7 and I really don't want #2 to be in the winter to. We are going to be stopping soon for a few months... but putting it off scares me too.

Originally Posted by trying4more I say GO FOR IT! Everything will work itself out!!!

[homebirthmom]

yep go for it. i get all of what you said and posted a similar post and got pregnant.
the summer/fall baby is so nice cause you get out and aren't depressed while cooped up in winter. I have 2 winter babies and gah, so not fun w christmas. LOL

good luck!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!