Reply Hey Mom! Learn more about the Gerber Life Insurance Grow-Up Plan!
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 01-15-2013, 09:18 PM   #61
FindingMercy's Avatar
FindingMercy
Registered Users
Formerly: Evie'sMama
seller
 
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Kansas City, MO
Posts: 2,479
My Mood:
Re: January 2013 Chat Thread

From the adoption consultant we used, I can pass along her info if anyone is interested:

The Barker Foundation is seeking an adoptive family for one-month old African American twin boys. The precious boys were born in mid-December at 31 weeks gestation. We are only seeking home-study approved families who are open to adopting the twins together.

Baby Boy A has no significant medical diagnoses and has been discharged to one of Barkerís private foster families. He is ready for immediate placement with his adoptive family.

Baby Boy B has been diagnosed with Spastic Quadriplegic Cerebral Palsy. He is receiving outstanding medical care at an excellent neonatal intensive care unit in Washington, DC. In his current state, he is not able to sense pain, blink or gag. He will soon undergo surgery to insert a G-Tube and a tracheotomy and he will require use of an apnea monitor.

Advertisement

__________________
Married to Scott and Mama to Evelyn (5) Annabelle (3) and Abraham (1)

I blog about our family, trans-racial adoption, gluten-free cooking, and crafting

FindingMercy is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-16-2013, 11:04 AM   #62
Msheidiann's Avatar
Msheidiann
Registered Users
seller
 
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: California
Posts: 1,014
My Mood:
Re: January 2013 Chat Thread

Findingmercy...any news??? This is bringing back memories for me of trying to get bio MOM to sign. It's a frustrating/scary thing. Thinking of you and your family.
__________________
SAHM and Wife to Matthew
Forever Mommy to Thomas
Msheidiann is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-16-2013, 11:37 AM   #63
FindingMercy's Avatar
FindingMercy
Registered Users
Formerly: Evie'sMama
seller
 
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Kansas City, MO
Posts: 2,479
My Mood:
Quote:
Originally Posted by Msheidiann
Findingmercy...any news??? This is bringing back memories for me of trying to get bio MOM to sign. It's a frustrating/scary thing. Thinking of you and your family.
It got moved to tomorrow afternoon. Biodad just found out that we are White though and is pissed. The family is saying they want to fight for him back because White people beat and kill their kids. 0.o
__________________
Married to Scott and Mama to Evelyn (5) Annabelle (3) and Abraham (1)

I blog about our family, trans-racial adoption, gluten-free cooking, and crafting

FindingMercy is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-16-2013, 11:53 AM   #64
Msheidiann's Avatar
Msheidiann
Registered Users
seller
 
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: California
Posts: 1,014
My Mood:
Re: January 2013 Chat Thread

oh mama...I am so sorry you guys are dealing with all of this!!! Thinking of you and your family. Keep us posted. PM if you need to vent!!!
__________________
SAHM and Wife to Matthew
Forever Mommy to Thomas
Msheidiann is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-16-2013, 11:57 AM   #65
FindingMercy's Avatar
FindingMercy
Registered Users
Formerly: Evie'sMama
seller
 
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Kansas City, MO
Posts: 2,479
My Mood:
Thanks. It's stressful, but because he provided zero support other while pregnant and hasn't tried to see Abraham or check into what happened with him until now, he shouldn't have a chance in hell of getting him. I mostly feel bad for his bio mom. This is all super stressful for her and she's really worried Abraham will be sent to bio dad. He and his family are also harassing her about it.
__________________
Married to Scott and Mama to Evelyn (5) Annabelle (3) and Abraham (1)

I blog about our family, trans-racial adoption, gluten-free cooking, and crafting

FindingMercy is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-16-2013, 12:05 PM   #66
Msheidiann's Avatar
Msheidiann
Registered Users
seller
 
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: California
Posts: 1,014
My Mood:
Re: January 2013 Chat Thread

Poor bio mom...so frustrating. I am so sorry you guys are having to deal with it. It drives me crazy that bios don't do or say anything until it comes down to actually signing or TPR.

How is the formula going??
__________________
SAHM and Wife to Matthew
Forever Mommy to Thomas
Msheidiann is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-16-2013, 12:43 PM   #67
Kimmyann's Avatar
Kimmyann
Registered Users
seller
 
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: NJ
Posts: 3,506
My Mood:
Re: January 2013 Chat Thread

Quote:
Originally Posted by FindingMercy View Post
Thanks. It's stressful, but because he provided zero support other while pregnant and hasn't tried to see Abraham or check into what happened with him until now, he shouldn't have a chance in hell of getting him. I mostly feel bad for his bio mom. This is all super stressful for her and she's really worried Abraham will be sent to bio dad. He and his family are also harassing her about it.
Anyway Biomom can get a restraining order against any contact from them?
__________________
Adoption is my option!Adoptive Mom to Cory (6 years old)
Heartbreakingly long wait to adopt baby 2. (5 years waiting at this point with no end in sight) Please lord..end this wait soon.
Kimmyann is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-17-2013, 09:58 AM   #68
newmommy13's Avatar
newmommy13
Registered Users
seller
seller
 
Join Date: Apr 2008
Posts: 7,750
Finding mercy-i found a pic of Js dad online too. I googled his name and found his mugshots. He is a baby! And looks just like j. A baby and the father to 4+kids already. His mom wants to grt custody of j and the rest of the kids and has been coming to all visits but SW told me her living situation isnt suitable. Um...according to them our 2 bedroom home is suitable for 6 people? Her house must be a closet. Im afraid of their reaction when they find out we are getting the twins. They are pleasant but they usually drop j with me then the mom, grandma and other foster mom chit chat for a while and i just leave. I have not great social skills which doesnt help but i feel like the odd man out. I am the odd man out lol!

A-i cant believe your cw isnt keeping you in the loop better. How can she just leave you hanging? I feel very informed about our case and my sw answers my emails within an hour of sending when i have questions. Well i guess i will find out for sure at court in feb!

Quote:
Originally Posted by mmbreb

Yes thankfully I am good at the consistency but it feels like he is in time out or sitting on his bed half the day. we do Time Out (4 min on the bench) first and if he is still completely out of control he takes some time to sit on his bed and chill out. Keeping him in my sight is important but with the two little it can be harder than it sounds. Especially because my LO is potty training and we spend a lot of time doing the potty thing.

I am trying to be postivie with him and give him lots of attention. It can be hard at time because we are busy a lot of the time. I am not a fan of three day a week visits. I know it is important for them but it sure makes a mess of my week. (I know some of you mamas have it much harder but it is an adjustment for us homebodies over here!)



You are a brave woman! I feel like I am nuts with these three

I am so sorry mama!!!

AFM: Things are still pretty hard with X-Man. Every night time and nap time is a battle. I always lay both boys down together but the rule is if X-man screams or gets out of bed I take Little-man out. (It makes Little-man freak out when X-man does these things) Well almost ever night/nap time we go through the routine and than X-man cries for Little man. If he still can't be quiet I shut the door. (He has a night light and his screaming disrupts little man and my DS.) Usually this works out to be 10-20 minutes of X-man having a fit after I remove Little man and shut the door. I hate doing it because he cries that he wants the door open and his brother with him but its the only way he will sleep. He sleeps for at least an hour at nap time so I am sure he needs it.

Bio Mom is giving the boys Chetos Pop Bug Juice and donuts during visits. I heard her say today when the boys asked for the things out of the bag as I was leaving "No that if for closer to the time you leave. You cant have it yet." She is intentionally sugering them up and they act horrible when they come back. I am super annoyed! Otherwise she has seemed okay so far but I don't understand why she would want to make their day miserable. They suffer for it!!!

Little man and my DS fight over me holding them constantly. Its always "my mommy, my mommy". I feel bad sometimes because there is not enough of me to go around and everyone here needs my one on one attention! There is only so much mama to go around:/

Little man and I are really bonding. He really loves to be held. X-man and I are bonding but more slowly. He wanted to give me a kiss today which was a first. He is much more attached to his bio mom though than little man.

Today when I picked them up from meeting with Bio Mom Little man cried for me to hold him when Bio mom was holding him. It hurts my heart to know he can attach to me so quickly. It says a lot for what his life has been like

Lastly we are going to try to get X-man into pre-school. I think he will really benefit from some play time with kids his age. He needs to learn to be social with other children in a productive way and he really needs to work on some important kindergarten readiness stuff.
I asked if mom plans on giving lunch to the kids since visits are at noon. She said she always has lunch for them and pointed to the kids table pressed up against the tv stand. One big bowl of cheetos and one big bowl of cookies. When j picked up a cookie she said no no honey, eat your chips first. I hope shes eating better than this but i doubt it.
__________________
I, mama to dd A (3-08) dfs J (10/11) and in love with newbie dfd N! (10/13)
hopeful pre-adoptive foster family
newmommy13 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-17-2013, 01:55 PM   #69
zeotwoski's Avatar
zeotwoski
Registered Users
seller
 
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Upstate NY
Posts: 766
My Mood:
Re: January 2013 Chat Thread

Hi mamas. I'm new to the daily chat thread, just could use some company waiting this out! We are foster/fost-adopt and got licensed about 3.5 years ago. Had 4 respite kiddos then an infant we had for 15 months, then a newborn for a couple months. We let our certification expire after a heartbreak with the long term baby...then got recertified this July. Since then we have had zero calls (but they also knew we weren't quite ready as I was due in September with DC#4) until last week--we got a call for a 19 mos old which we agreed to take, but he ended up not coming into care. From what the worker said though it sounds like they're still working on it. We're so anxious now, and concerned for the little one and an unborn sibling as well. The last couple months I've been so strongly wanting a placement. Of course no calls means no need which is the best, but now that I know what I know about little one...can't help but worry.

Finding Mercy--praying all goes well today!
__________________
Cathy
SAHM to B, 6 and S, 4 , H, 2 and baby M. R, 2 and baby A Missing babies N and L.
zeotwoski is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-17-2013, 02:35 PM   #70
WynneBabies's Avatar
WynneBabies
Registered Users
seller
 
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: USA
Posts: 6,546
My Mood:
Re: January 2013 Chat Thread

Court was an absolute fiasco for many, many reasons. I cannot get detailed, but essentially dad got more time (he wasn't even there) to take a paternity test. If he does in the next six weeks before the next court hearing, they may be extending the case 6 months for dad to work a plan. By default, mom will get 6 more months when they were planning to file TPR next month. That's just the tip of our day. It was a surreal nightmare.
__________________
A SAHM to four long out of diapers (all used cloth for all or part of their diapering years) and a baby girl currently in cloth part time.
WynneBabies is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump

Copyright © 2005 - 2014 Escalate Media. All Rights Reserved.