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Old 01-09-2013, 12:37 PM   #11
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Re: I just found out I'm pregnant again. My baby is only 3 months old.

Sorry for the surprise mama. I would give the mama the donated milk and tell her it's the last that your baby might need it. I am sure she will understand. I agree with talking to DH about it hopefully his positive energy will rub off- if not don't beat yourself up about it. A good friend of mine had irish twins and they are super close and he was so young he didn't know any better.

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Old 01-09-2013, 12:49 PM   #12
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Re: I just found out I'm pregnant again. My baby is only 3 months old.

You will get there. This is overwhelming and a huge surprise.....but it will in the end be a surprise blessing that you and your children will love dearly!!! Take each day at a time. It is okay to grieve for a little while...this isn't what you planned, but don't dwell on it. This has happened to many women, babies, children, etc before and they have gotten through. your baby will adjust as will her big brother. In fact some of my closest were the EASIEST for the sibling to adjust to and cope...and they are the closest friends. Do your best!!
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Old 01-09-2013, 01:05 PM   #13
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Re: I just found out I'm pregnant again. My baby is only 3 months old.

I feel your pain. There ARE positives to this, though! My two youngest are only 12.5 months apart. They are SO close. They wear the same clothes. They like the same toys/things. They have similar interests, and they look out for eachother. It really IS a good thing to have them close together sometimes. Yes, it is going to be similar to raising twins. But you will see that it is going to be worth it in the end!

Don't feel guilty about mourning, or being upset. You have 9 months (well, a little less) to get used to this idea. You have time to adjust. If you need to be upset right now, be upset. It's scary, I know. Don't feel guilty about it.

As far as the breastfeeding thing... I can't help there. My breastmilk dried up, and I just let it. I didn't know what else to do, and I had a serious lack of knowledge back then.

If you need to talk, I'm here.
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Old 01-09-2013, 01:17 PM   #14
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Re: I just found out I'm pregnant again. My baby is only 3 months old.

It will be okay. My brother and I are 1 year and 2 weeks apart exactly. Growing up we were the best of friends..always had a playmate, did the same things together.
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Old 01-09-2013, 01:18 PM   #15
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Re: I just found out I'm pregnant again. My baby is only 3 months old.

I can't even imagine how you must feel.

As far as diet, just make sure you're getting lots of calories. They say an extra 300 calories/day for pregnancy, and an extra 500 calories/day for nursing, so that's about 800 calories for you. If I were you, I would also aim to get at least 100 grams of protein per day. The Brewer Diet recommends 80-100 for a pregnant woman, so you'd want more than that since you're pregnant and nursing. Try to get as much from calorie and nutritionally dense foods as you can.

If you see a dip in your supply, there is a supplement you can take from Motherlove Herbal that's for breastfeeding while pregnant. Here's a link to the product. It is completely safe to breastfeed while pregnant and your supply won't necessarily dry up, especially if you do things to help protect it. There's a blog called The Adventures of Lactating Girl and she nursed through pregnancy and has been tandem nursing her two girls. They're not so close in age as yours, but it might be a good resource to read about another mom tandem nursing. She has a few posts about it. There's also a book called Adventures in Tandem Nursing that I've heard and seen recommended a few times in various places to moms who are planning on or considering tandem nursing. When your colostrum comes in, both babies get the colostrum. It's a supply and demand thing to some extent, just like mature milk. Moms who have twins make enough colostrum for both babies (usually), so there's no reason to think that you wouldn't have enough for both your nurslings. When the new baby comes, you will of course have to make nursing him/her a higher priority than your older nursling, but that doesn't mean you have to wean. From what I've read in blogs by moms who've tandem nursed, the older one usually understands that the newborn needs it more often and are okay with sharing, especially since they aren't summarily cut off. If you do choose to tandem nurse, it might help your bond with your current baby, because you won't have to choose between the two babies, so to speak. (I don't know, really, just thinking in type.) If there's a LLL group or breastfeeding support group that meets in your area, it would probably be beneficial to go to that. LLL groups and LCs generally have a lot of good resources for a variety of nursing situations, including yours. Hang in there. You can do this.
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Old 01-09-2013, 02:19 PM   #16
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Re: I just found out I'm pregnant again. My baby is only 3 months old.

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Old 01-09-2013, 02:57 PM   #17
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Re: I just found out I'm pregnant again. My baby is only 3 months old.

that would be a shocker. But you know what? You couldnt give your daughter a better first birthday gift! Children love having brothers and sisters

On the pumping I would probably warn the other momma that she may want to look for other options because its very likely you are going to have a significant decrease in supply. You should be fine to nurse your own little one (I have nursed through 2 pregnancies) but pumping may not work. I would get on a really good vitamin and eat lots of healthy foods, oatmeal is supposed to help with supply and is good for you too. I ate it everyday through my dryer spells of pregnancy and we made it through, my daughter was 21 months when her little sister was born.
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Old 01-09-2013, 06:31 PM   #18
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Deep breaths....you can do it! It will ne hard for a little while nut they will ne the best of friends one day. Give yourself a break and relax....you have 9 months to adjust to the idea of a new baby oh and congrats
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Old 01-09-2013, 06:50 PM   #19
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Re: I just found out I'm pregnant again. My baby is only 3 months old.

It's ok mama What your daughter misses in time with you will be made up with closeness with her sibling. Perhaps you can schedule a time every day where your husband takes your son and you have some quality bonding time with your daughter. Or start a ritual with her that's just the two of you. A bedtime story or song or a morning time tickle or cuddle in bed. It'll all work out in the long run.
I also breastfed my daughter through into the second trimester. Now she was 10 months when I got pregnant and wasn't nursing as much but I could have gone longer but chose not to. I'd do what the other mothers recommend. Let that lady know what's happened and then keep breastfeeding your daughter and stock up some. Most women don't dry up until the second trimester so your daughter will be 6 months then, the amount of time they recommend exclusively breastfeeding. Make sure you drink lots of water and take the supplements others have recommended if you need to. Also, if your supply does tank, you can always pump when the next baby is born and give it to your daughter in a bottle or sippy cup. don't worry about the future what ifs. Take one day at a time. Today you just have two children to care for, today you can nurse your baby. Today you can spend time with your daughter. You'll find when #3 comes things will work themselves out.
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Old 01-09-2013, 07:08 PM   #20
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Re: I just found out I'm pregnant again. My baby is only 3 months old.

I'll be thinking good thoughts for you! PM me if you want to talk.
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