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Old 01-16-2013, 09:29 AM   #1
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Too early? Opinions and Disscusion!

I have a two-year-old DD that is beginning to potty training, and a one-year-old DS still in nappies. DD sleeps in bed with me, My hubby works third shift, so it is easier for her to sleep in bed with me. Although I would like her to sleep in her own bed, she is pretty adamant about being in my bed. We are getting her a new bed this week, you going to try to get her to sleep in a bigger bed since she is used to sleeping in one anyway. I am beginning to get the fever, do you think it is better to have children early in all at once, or spread them out more throughout the years? The way I look at it it seems better to have them all at once that way you get the craziness over with. And that way they all grow up around the same phases. Does anyone have experience with this? And what are your thoughts?

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Old 01-16-2013, 11:25 AM   #2
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Re: Too early? Opinions and Disscusion!

I personally don't know how you do it already with a 1 and a 2 yr old. I would go insane! My DD will be 3 next month and I am due with DS in April. I think 3-4 yrs is a good range personally because I don't think I could handle that much chaos at once. More power to ya!
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Old 01-16-2013, 12:12 PM   #3
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Re: Too early? Opinions and Disscusion!

Mine are 18 and 19 months apart, ages 3, 2 & 7.5 months. I ready and willing for another any time, trusting the Lord for the timing. I love it!
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Old 01-16-2013, 12:22 PM   #4
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Re: Too early? Opinions and Disscusion!

Closely spaced children can definitely be done, if you and DH are (physically and mentally) ready and willing. My mom had a baby in Feb. '84, June '85, Jan. '87 (me) and July '88. So it was boom, boom, boom, one right after another. Although, some prefer more of a space, but then there's also those that don't have a choice. I was hoping that DS and the next would be about 2 years apart but I didn't have a say in the matter.
AFM I had a chemical in September, would have been due in June which would have made them exactly 2 years apart, and then had a miscarriage in December (I was 12 weeks). So sometimes you can do exactly what you want, and sometimes you just don't have a choice and have to accept what ever you are blessed with.
I hope things work out for you as you want them to.
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Old 01-16-2013, 12:24 PM   #5
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Re: Too early? Opinions and Disscusion!

My 1st 3 are 2 years apart and the last 3 are 15/16 months apart. I like them close in age. Its kinda split now with 3 older and 3 younger but we can still enjoy family stuff together. The kids are close and they all play well together. Im hoping to have another child soon but the closest it would be to my youngest is 17 months.

I say go for it now. The only downside to waiting imo is you never know howlong it will take to get pregnant/deliver.
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Old 01-16-2013, 01:02 PM   #6
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Re: Too early? Opinions and Disscusion!

My 1st 2 are 11 yrs apart and that was easy. My 2nd 2 are 15 mos apart and very hard. Add in a 9 mos old (makes 3 & 4 2 and 3/4 yr apart) and it is even harder. I rather had 5 yrs in between, but had infertility and am old.
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Old 01-16-2013, 01:12 PM   #7
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Re: Too early? Opinions and Disscusion!

I think if you have a DH that is able and willing to be a major help then closely spaced will be no problem I have 2 that are just under 12 months apart and am due in May with my third. And honestly, it's been a little boring around here (talk to me in 4 months lol!)
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Old 01-16-2013, 01:19 PM   #8
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Re: Too early? Opinions and Disscusion!

You know I was all 4 splitting them up. My brother is 6 years older than me and my husbands sister is 4 years older then him. We planned to do about 3-4 years apart. But Now thinking about doing #2 i understand for the first time while people do it all at once. I always heard people say "to get the diapers out of the way" well diapers don't bother me so I thought that was a stupid saying.

DS didn't spend a night away from us until about 2.5 years old. Since then we have gotten away from a few evenings and a weekend. We are planning a week trip away soon. So what I now see about starting over is another 2.5 years before we can get away again. Though it may be easier asking grandma to take a 3 year old and a 7 year old over a 3yo and 4yo though so though we have to wait again at least it may be possible again someday.

That being said I think I would have gone insane if we had then much closer together. I love me son, but I like to say it doesn't come easy for me, I don't have the best patience.

We also were thinking about 3 years apart and now with it not coming easily it's looking like it could easily be 4.5+ years apart.....

I have heard that its harder to choose family things to do that makes everyone happy. I didn't find it an issue growing up but maybe I should ask my brother....
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Old 01-16-2013, 02:58 PM   #9
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I am so thankful for so many responses, and all across the board! I am exclusively a stay-at-home mom and husband is the sole income. So I suppose that I would rather have them as close together as I can. Diapers don't bother me either, I have plenty of them. Considering they are both in them right now, well at least one is exclusively serious. But with one on the way in potty training I figure it might be a good idea to start so those extra diapers get used up ;-) I know this may sound selfish but I would like to have them close, so when they do get older my husband and I can actually have time together again. I know the season of chaos will seem very difficult at times, but if the Lord wills it will make me stronger woman of god. I asked DD if she wanted another brother or sister, and her reaction was a very excited, yes! I suppose it just depends on each individual situation. And usually you don't think you can handle things, until you are thrown into them. Some people think that it is crazy, to have a heart to only trust in God for your "birth-control". But ultimately, even if you do use birth control, he is in control of it all! But I do get nervous about the regression stage when a new baby comes along, especially with sleeping situations. I can't remember the last time DH and I actually slept in bed together. Needless to say the living room or is our go to place for intimacy, LOL. But with babies in the house, you take what you can get!
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Old 01-16-2013, 10:31 PM   #10
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Re: Too early? Opinions and Disscusion!

We have almost exactly (ten days over) 3 years apart between DD1 and DS. We are now going to have almost exactly 2.5 years in between DS and DD2 (to be born any time now). This spacing has worked really well for us and I feel our family is truly ready for our new little one. I think spacing is truly a personal decision based on a family's needs but like other mama's have said a lot of times we don't have a lot of control over the timing, ha ha
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